 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
9 H* A- W! L5 D. y. S请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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: }0 P" T( p" W* V7 b1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.7 h+ L* @1 ~& r# @
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫( x. e6 v& ?- K/ o
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
8 G9 R: R1 X" g" A: o0 z1 k2 n( x; _down.
( c0 _4 ?7 [/ Q$ P' q/ ~ bWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down.
: t& C2 l% g% @. Z# B1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？" i7 @1 T N* H+ V
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
6 Z7 o% e( i1 u& mLet it be.7 l* b6 |0 ]: O% E6 @# B" H0 v
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it( X5 ~( U! E/ T' S
that way.
1 H7 s; i% e; Q. D* S1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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' S* X9 [, z2 a! Q* t% h& n1. Crying is blackmail.( A/ p1 x( Y; B" H9 J* U; q# {
1，哭泣是敲诈. C- d. l: N3 x* _* E
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1. Ask for what you want. U- Z" c8 `6 c" m% [( \
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!( |3 H/ w0 G. t, O0 k
Strong hints do not work!
_) ~% M$ v% j2 p, _Obvious hints do not work!( X( B* e. V& g& J1 w% V
Just say it!
- F( e2 I# o# o" A; [. f4 |; `1，你想要什么就说& V- s3 \' e" S
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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* |" Z3 U1 t8 z! L! N4 u1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
0 b! V1 A8 h; U0 B1 j+ p9 l# G& Pquestion.
% H* @" U% Y+ m) H8 {0 y1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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) p# r0 N3 ?6 t( g& N1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
/ N/ D( R% W8 U5 lwhat we do.
% g* m/ W, m3 Z0 \3 W6 RSympathy is what your girlfriends are for./ g$ {: y" q" ]1 j" O& k
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。, x; M! a6 q) P2 Z. R
6 J- N. @! J- `. o' J) y! ^1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
7 W; i8 s6 X' z1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去. _/ p5 j y" y S9 ]! f& ~5 |
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.+ N1 e! ^! V$ `& D, j8 G
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
0 @& A# P: d: m! ]6 k f; F我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了, C; J0 \0 ^ H* P' T. z" J* a
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us D5 Q S a) y: @, x
to act like soap opera guys.( I5 ]! x% I7 V4 K& g1 K" t
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.; S6 {3 q$ V# j8 D# k; h* |9 P
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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9 _( U$ W; r. C9 Q/ ?8 O1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways. C7 A+ _3 m: m; ~. r
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
' e+ W2 w& V1 x! D) Q' ^: F+ Y" u1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。: x' @7 v2 e5 K8 B( T$ f. d' I
; i0 @# A7 R2 }( g1 K& n* j0 \（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）6 ~5 d @+ N) o, b( [
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it8 o3 W4 L% d+ x F1 W; }4 r
done. Not both.
% d9 _7 |+ M! ]$ ^If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.! ?' K# ]' J% ~$ }' W& l$ s
+ Y! H R: [& F9 F# I8 i1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during- M0 h$ O7 I% G" m, E/ D' }
commercials.
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1 {4 a" B. a: U! B: x1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.2 c0 c' |( a' t( g. B6 `
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
- h5 u3 q# c8 A. V ?, Y% V" o: JPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
# c, R# t- P7 w" YWe have no idea what mauve is./ r9 ]2 J- k! p# e( m2 F. q9 I) e
" U: l% ~; B' d0 K' g1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.. z! D8 }6 G' ]
& ^- w0 M( W1 \* D) S6 b) L5 { e1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
( u) u, }+ [& hnothing's wrong.
5 Y1 }* l& [! H; @5 yWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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0 ^" @% R! V0 ~( \1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
$ |9 `; R3 X: `/ z9 n' Qyou don't want to hear.9 E4 p1 N, H A
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is4 K v& M v* [- F1 i8 l5 Q
fine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to6 r; Y( G5 ^( |/ o/ ?# \% [
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.7 t7 J, Q" R& y) s& Z1 f- Q7 F
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1. You have too many shoes.
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0 H/ F/ b" @% Y0 r! J6 d7 V- S1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!! h8 K5 O+ I; X
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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9 ?( g) M4 z) n7 M( n& NYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
0 n0 G: r1 S. \, ~* FBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.2 g' c7 q% [6 H1 P8 s9 u7 \
& ]8 p8 W J9 T3 T5 B2 ?Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
9 }& u% H+ h7 |* b3 R6 v. m6 p4 RPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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