 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
% Q4 I# P. {& z& e请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.# W" [5 V* o% U, T9 ^
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫/ p/ A5 ]6 ^/ Y, b6 l
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
! Q$ H1 j( J& T" Q+ n$ pdown.1 A+ ^; j# _$ }
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
2 k3 ^/ v6 @$ {you
* ]3 j _' V: q5 D% g8 }9 u. [) Mleaving it down.
: T* D: p3 G- E D3 e( [% d J1 p. I6 X& E1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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" R' I1 z4 _& j& ` r6 K% ?1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
$ J! R3 p$ k8 X0 k! X, J# q: kLet it be.
" I; m/ E$ {- m% O5 n: h1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去+ M, {+ I/ }2 {0 @% U/ o
- o& G3 J& A3 f% T6 F0 ^, K9 A' W1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
* H9 F) g: A4 k( k: G& |3 athat way., V( g. J0 o" m, X
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！/ N8 v# _. N0 J/ o. F8 w8 C
. x0 q& K! K: C L m6 p* I) p1. Crying is blackmail.
s2 E2 @4 B! K( I1，哭泣是敲诈
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1. Ask for what you want.! i2 I" R: u8 [' }
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!: C9 R+ z _1 h$ a! b, W y
Strong hints do not work!3 t6 G. u( g7 k& P' Z
Obvious hints do not work!7 ~3 F" P6 s) Z- d2 p
Just say it!
8 d: {5 T- ^" S1，你想要什么就说
, A5 o: O+ q& |+ ]( p: p我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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3 V3 \$ o% }0 ? ?1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
" l6 i1 U0 G5 U! u% n% u2 kquestion.: u; K: t- n9 S6 R0 S& C1 ]0 W2 t
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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, q# y, T4 d8 g; a3 ~ N1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's1 |. n1 f9 Z6 M- m3 q5 G, B2 k5 {9 o
what we do.
" I% P2 r, P K/ F: f' t+ E3 hSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
; m: h' _. t: I r6 e4 D g1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。. k% {: j" q1 ^/ z/ ?* r4 J( M
7 a' z3 z5 J' J9 Y1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.. B) T1 R7 Z1 Q8 n( X, d; e
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去4 P7 g2 ]% P/ S* Y2 F2 R
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.! }; a! T; ^. I! U9 e& N" c! @
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
' p# w! g. t3 ]/ i% ^+ B我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了! X& e z0 S$ ?$ g3 L0 ~; m
9 \1 ]4 i \* X8 J: [1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
9 g* C; [' m+ H$ s9 T! u# Qto act like soap opera guys.
9 b% A* X) g1 K, M X/ H1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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8 G6 N* H9 ?8 F2 ^) N% w, m1 i1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
+ O' L; r0 c2 r1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们2 n; d- `1 h3 T7 {& U8 d1 |8 _' X
' ?! I/ l- Z. h. z$ {1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
, u/ Y: \1 }$ c. U; x; W& x0 fmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.. B3 S) l. B% Z5 b
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）$ ^$ }/ i+ l5 h/ n
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
9 m3 y: V7 \' y6 m6 }3 o7 ddone. Not both.# x2 n/ e8 w; \) r* c
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.% H: c Z1 k& r: ^
- Z; N3 {6 |! X$ t, c! F1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.8 N$ U' W7 Y* Q/ \+ s( j
: ~/ d1 `+ X0 U* Q1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
. t, p$ `. Z1 I# \, ^6 y" NPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.0 P3 |8 ]- W6 S) l! a! X8 [8 }
We have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that." b3 T0 H: z v$ h9 B
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like2 T/ K7 H0 W" m: I5 h9 S& ~# q
nothing's wrong.- j5 G. P3 n- [2 m
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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8 f! x' o3 ^" J6 V) X5 b1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
) g) e" k! T9 U7 I! a. n2 G: }you don't want to hear.
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% P! a+ X8 T$ T" Z/ [1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is+ T" W$ n# P5 T, l
fine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to4 h6 O0 L. Q% ]. r" ^
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.& O7 c0 {% a3 ]5 |( i8 }
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1. You have too many shoes.5 [# ]* b7 r; r% H$ G
: c& ]$ F) l# c1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
* l/ b' d5 N4 C" z. [1 d; {- kBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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' s5 U) F* W/ x1 K4 bPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.# \, F0 a* r/ v5 P
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
