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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
7 x/ D+ b( t+ i! t8 \- ]请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写* q3 }6 p5 G, w# W$ ]- |, h

& i) S8 l9 X$ c. k7 `) {% x* J1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
# I5 D- d' z/ A1 j4 c: o+ i" S1 L1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫4 ?& f% r6 W, J
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1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
. h4 r# U7 m. l0 n' T7 `+ H; Ndown.9 R+ s3 z2 k! y0 g
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
- b. U8 [' g6 L) Zyou. V3 {( ~, x8 s
leaving it down.
" ^3 v$ ^: i  w3 K5 c$ A; l1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.1 T3 x$ s$ ^! h
Let it be., }$ x9 N/ [* p
1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it8 e' i" Z' X: f" ?/ r
that way.& M8 x: Y9 T- k) R; x% @+ y! k
1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
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2 l6 i9 S: J+ f- a. o) E1. Crying is blackmail.
& j6 C: L5 W4 _8 H1,哭泣是敲诈% P6 Y' D9 g) k$ @! C7 E% Z, g

3 X+ |2 [+ d7 t% M: M3 P. y) {1. Ask for what you want.
; U# M  D$ v0 j1 x+ DLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
  R, \: _* [, [7 ~3 S2 ^2 yStrong hints do not work!$ V2 _+ @8 _( g% M; k
Obvious hints do not work!$ w- }( @; u2 O# F, t5 _( s' @
Just say it!
, o3 [0 e7 w9 c, \  u  \; L4 l1,你想要什么就说( J' r+ F6 _% _8 C: F
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
, s/ _& D( n; e; n" Y* qquestion.3 |+ e5 i, F) p1 p3 j) s/ q
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)) v# ]8 l& r. x" `) e- d5 b+ `
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's
4 A" @. Y  b! \6 ~- b* C/ |what we do.
5 ~1 F8 B) G. A" C! @Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.) ^3 a$ e0 @  A5 G3 C" E
1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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" c' B6 P7 ~! L6 n) J% j" |7 l1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.
. x( }& h7 H; n- n1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去' Y: p  \- @9 m$ a
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument., ^+ }" l( |9 U. `' ?, \/ L
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.* A" H9 G: L) I9 P2 Y# _
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了3 d- V  `: j0 G5 Z, N" V6 U* i

" V+ Y: v, e. y; N4 {2 O1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us4 Z: D& l, w1 G
to act like soap opera guys.7 ]# [, j6 `8 y, b' J- O
1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.5 z" E+ k* t! z/ Y1 _
1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们: ~0 H' Q* f' h2 p- J3 A, |
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways  t$ h+ J2 l6 B7 T( ~$ `" N: C
makes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.2 j. H) N; ]0 d/ ?+ |) E! ~
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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5 r. r! z) I* m/ Q  n(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)
1 I" d+ w) F" @  `& H/ {% C; i+ t0 @1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
# l4 }; R8 g6 jdone. Not both.9 i3 K: m# I2 s, t) l& [$ y
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.  F: M. q9 B' j) k3 v. X
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during# @! @8 t8 [+ Y1 q# G. ?( u2 v9 O
commercials.
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# s" `9 F( A/ Y9 w1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.2 E6 N8 P1 w8 L( z% u6 Q" K9 |
* {3 E1 r" }7 L5 w7 K" }
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
0 I8 h+ d" b* ~0 J$ z. `2 M) JPeach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
+ B: [7 b0 i3 Q. r, e% P$ iWe have no idea what mauve is." P" Y7 S' Y$ U2 U" B
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.+ w* _$ N& `& q

' j( V. X) r3 g" G) J# M1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like" P& g  d) [7 N9 E
nothing's wrong.
: O' Z1 ^' G8 n! |1 R* ~& q* r* e+ @We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.& A3 ~& ]! R$ A- b) V

1 r5 ]; _% E$ W. ]1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer8 c1 U9 U$ e3 @/ ~6 T" e; q, A
you don't want to hear.6 F% ^; f. U; u9 _

7 q/ x2 R) j+ w$ a* B1 Z' U1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is" ^; _, V0 Y0 u
fine...Really.
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; a, G" X! Y7 }+ I# J$ p$ }* a1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
" c. g: k$ G7 Y/ Z, r9 {discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.
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1. You have too many shoes.3 Q- {+ G) L& f8 \) u0 z0 J) z

; O1 F/ J4 U; L4 p& A* O4 G/ ~1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!  x# @7 u: _1 B4 U  X, \( ?

4 a# o" F; s; `1 U& @3 Z4 L3 {4 @1. Thank you for reading this.
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! A  I8 i9 f# J6 XYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
/ |( B- I, L/ D( O% l2 U' {4 l( {$ pBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
/ @+ ]8 u$ y2 y% c( vPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。4 w! D8 a) O' b; p! w; ~  J# }

+ X1 g5 E) t8 z% G) J% l% W; `1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。
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) V! r6 w; F, H( R1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
7 b" H+ Y. r4 }8 S1 W我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!
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. W7 d  g. p6 ?9 R$ A  z) l1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.- J" s; C, l  \  |+ _' s! S
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.. n7 d2 Z- i& V- @* J
如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。( b& i( F! k8 B$ U1 M4 w" U' G' {7 a2 S. T
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.; l* _5 `! n) h+ h
如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.* o( Y4 }* a' r. v) H0 v6 A
如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:
0 B* o' x1 y& g1 }ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.
; I4 @( p$ C% d1 K2 f5 \0 K所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really., ?. [: p$ s5 Z) H8 X
如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你- p* S; ?  n2 z. X: J+ b; B2 g

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* l* O+ B4 N: D4 S. c1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
0 Y" V8 z$ @& ]: ?- ?& p3 c不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。; O: n. N" }" a  F7 y2 X
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1. You have enough clothes.
" M7 S% }7 u* ]' }! b- O) R你的衣服足够多了" E( x8 @3 b! K2 p$ ^. H
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1. You have too many shoes.
/ X5 |. O3 M$ b你的鞋子也太多了吧
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. L; `: S6 E2 t; q3 x- |1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!% r" D0 s2 i6 A/ P  B
我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?
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1. Thank you for reading this.
5 y3 k6 m6 n, l1 t. J* u$ D4 Y+ Z多谢你能看完这个( ^* @1 J" h0 N. Z. S
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
7 u% a+ f" g' R% W& @/ p- [3 h我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:2 F& i' x! x! h& Y3 ]

4 g6 P* R: K( O- V& x  t# ?' S这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
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, ]' Z- B# G' d: N/ k7 ^2 g4 v应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿$ N( K- K: h" s# y" ]

7 H; @2 f: S, b% N  y, k玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:/ n6 Y* w) n6 p6 w
1. You have enough clothes.
; [- A/ R: F. B. Z+ k3 r/ M你的衣服足够多了
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1. You have too many shoes.+ K  ~' L# f* `. X+ g, C0 w+ ~
你的鞋子也太多了吧

' A: c1 f# O/ V/ H$ q这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
大型搬家
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
大型搬家
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?. v6 _9 M# U6 K8 B  ~5 q4 I
( a' M) |) h/ d: K/ T+ M
----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.) A( |1 r/ ~; Y* ]1 f
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!+ x, m1 @( I( Q8 O
Strong hints do not work!
% Q; C' n! I+ V7 N4 t: ]1 W2 DObvious hints do not work!
- ?; b+ x, }7 T6 _Just say it!5 j; b4 ]7 G+ f; V) h. v
1,你想要什么就说
5 ~2 |5 Q# k! W# M我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!3 f& e8 t  I  u* l
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关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:( z8 P- B; ~2 p# @2 j
1. Ask for what you want.0 g/ D! l6 R- {$ u$ O7 z
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
  t% i' Y/ ~# M7 oStrong hints do not work!) ]) l3 l, U- x- t1 ?+ ^
Obvious hints do not work!* Q1 c, a: K- m: E! L! g
Just say it!
7 c5 u1 V, j8 A( _1,你想要什么就说# Q( o% T: i- D1 I; r4 P7 e+ w
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...

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瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:# C7 @, Y6 G" N/ C; w, Y* W
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
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' \( {8 {" Y4 Y$ O$ }# x# V咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:- d- O( {# ?$ s9 q; L# P' R
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咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
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% w5 X& n8 }, Hhttp://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1

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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。$ g9 f# w8 X& T* _1 U6 h; S- U

! n& b# p( w) B: c5 m% K, ^还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:% Z: \: W& _' N) G: A+ T; f5 {

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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。4 \) i. e9 I  x/ P; C
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还想问问你的体会呢!
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, f7 a7 }: W1 q/ t9 p7 i6 g体会?8 n& N& X! J( z( k, F* x! C; Y5 R
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