 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Originally posted by shuishijie at 2005-6-24 12:15 PM:2 Z" q) }8 L3 ^% e1 ~& M! Z+ R# \
i sense a little tension here 4 b4 x+ z0 q& d# U
sorry, i didn't mean you by 'you' which is a general reference.
* V* _' r) a. `2 ]1 M' @back to our discussion, you are absolutely right.
) ?3 W! {% X: l% N+ i: }- wif she/he 有那金刚钻, ie. intelligence and self-control, then she/he 就能揽这瓷器活儿.
) i: B3 t% W) x; \" x7 w, m/ {7 L+ EFurthermore, if she/he cheated and is able to hide it for the rest of her/his life, then she/he has to bear with the guilty for the rest of her/his life.
4 Z! ^* j9 S# qIf both cheated and can face it very well, then both of them will be worried if the other will cheat again.6 m+ j& X. E- V8 y- o
If both are not worried about the other cheating, then is this a marriage you want?2 h/ \( U4 e: C, v- C. {
Not mean you here 4 }# }4 ], ^( @, E
! V; {7 _- @/ q- G没有没有,没有任何敌意, 随便聊天。8 z0 _/ B3 ^$ P
1 g* G+ N: `* C, d# [其实我只是说一种可能性,并没有道德评价,或者人身安插。$ T$ u4 @' A+ A$ |8 t$ ?
) O8 R& D# m. J+ Q h你后面的三种情形,不同的人,不同的情商,不同的原则,处理情况也不同,有的一样可以花好月圆,有的则是一团乱麻。所以我说的“金刚钻“的比喻,是说没有大家都搞定的本事(搞定情人老婆劳工和自己),就别冒险。
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比如前几天看到杂志里谈到“处理婚外恋“说得好,向你的伴侣坦白之前,先想一想,如果你只是想摆脱guilty感觉,那么向伴侣坦白,等于把自己的负担转移给你的伴侣而已,对你的婚姻毫无好处,那么不如跟心理医生讲述。除非这次婚外行为有性疾病的可能,你需要带你的伴侣去就医。所以还是说呢, if you can not take the heat, get out of the kitchen.& v! x" \# ^0 e$ o7 {; E( S$ S5 S
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我本人对夫妻远距离生存,各找临时情人,是持理解通融的态度的。我并不羡慕那些多年分离还守身如玉的夫妻。当然我也崇尚夫妻的忠诚,所以我更希望的是常相厮守。 |
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