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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:3 \- b' _4 {, w1 r5 g! r' K* _# H
# E, {3 [( Y* f1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
6 @" c0 f+ m. v6 R( s4 H% g2 whour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
* r! F& x$ I7 w8 q# ]morning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,6 e9 x5 _! b( Y" H9 L3 H
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a+ c( l$ F4 x( m, D2 x! ]1 E
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.
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: K$ h _* ?, F/ d/ j: k! X6 {4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
7 Z7 Z, k/ q3 [5 yown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest0 X4 U0 u4 O" `0 r" Q& i
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires: Z5 N% n+ x5 j8 E3 r& S
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell' i( [# T0 K. h8 i$ d, C
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,
& E' L; J$ j+ i/ U5 b! Icussed out, and possibly shot.
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6 Z5 I8 T# p4 G6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
* b' [0 l1 b& K5 w5 cget you shot.. `: m0 B1 B5 I$ P
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that; M" D! ?; ]. z4 ?# y# }
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
7 F) y# Z# \7 b: }: F% L: }the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot- [, Y; a% T& H4 G
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
/ Q+ h( d" F' e+ D& n! cvehicle through the intersection.# @( b; f: E: x' ?
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8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
( L2 T3 w+ n9 i+ J& B- ybarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next/ @' j! i% q9 ^$ l
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and% S* ?9 \6 u+ _% ^1 n# t
more construction starts everyday.- G1 D7 f, s0 k
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
6 g! r# P5 x' } |deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,; q# C& y* P8 J6 ~. G4 S) s
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.7 B2 o0 l1 {) Z1 x$ Z' R. @
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
+ h# b% l( z$ a; F9 aroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye0 G# t1 J. n; h: N/ M9 N. q
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
# O) R3 [$ d" S+ s9 O( N66 Street are also the same road; got it?6 v$ Z& i& h2 k
: ?( d% E: r8 G( u u11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the% S/ O$ V( [2 [4 r' l! M! I
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
+ y1 P9 K0 b( D- d: i9 J: [: [0 qActivated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
: B( N0 R4 \$ _; f1 W- v" iyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
% f3 m8 T/ O6 {8 caccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur8 J4 [, t. z; F; ~& _/ R( n- S
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
0 y1 K! C% S, R# \0 vblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
