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The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will- a' w% I" v: ]) l6 R+ W8 f8 U9 i
be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was
) q0 h; j) q. R7 `; bthe other possibility.! t/ c) P+ `/ t
) ?6 K. c: {) j* k; T( p" D. o# mAs part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English
; C! w$ y# T2 {+ F+ S2 yspelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5 year phase-in
+ z& B* g4 {' o/ O9 \: [plan that would become known as "EuroEnglish".* R! T) F; N$ L: e* G o
8 {: S7 P) d$ ~" C0 J: |7 nIn the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make9 F0 X6 Q: W: S4 ~
the sivil servants jump with joy.- L- l" W, z+ y z8 @% }4 f
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The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up
3 a. w( A( J3 w8 @/ j8 k2 Skonfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
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There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the
; n! E5 t3 ?, ?+ u, @, I% otroublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like( z3 O3 O1 x+ w$ m( g
fotograf 20% shorter.
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In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to
- S6 W/ g7 O) y3 ~& Wreach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.9 W! H& H( q! n p7 m# x
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Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always
" G0 J7 e* s0 b3 @ben a deterent to akurate speling.
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6 H* K/ Z0 Q3 ?Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is
' i9 {( p+ h0 xdisgrasful and it should go away.
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By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with0 |/ F4 R3 @6 Y% H" Q
"z" and "w" with "v".
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During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou"and8 `" G% C9 _5 y% i2 c3 `
after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
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4 m& e& L* ^' \7 d, s/ MZer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu t: h7 k# M5 b, q* f3 D" y
understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.5 f1 X$ I+ S" `+ b& s6 ^
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze
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/ b8 A/ y& g; c7 F9 U$ T! ]/ ]If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl. |
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