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The following is transcript of one of Carlin's program, not the above unfortunately, but it helps to read it.4 x+ Q% N P% ~1 H. G
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I love words. I thank you for hearing my words.
. w/ c: W5 _% u/ {2 y B9 U& ^I want to tell you something about words that I think is important.; f* F0 K: J1 Q4 b; c ]
They're my work, they're my play, they're my passion.- ~" J. @$ Q p+ V
Words are all we have, really. We have thoughts but thoughts are fluid.
) A9 l% d. v0 i$ |then we assign a word to a thought and we're stuck with that word for
/ J9 E. i8 w6 J: uthat thought, so be careful with words. I like to think that the same, m8 z2 T! P$ \6 i
words that hurt can heal, it is a matter of how you pick them.
# l+ X; |( ]" p! `6 ~There are some people that are not into all the words.% I) x( l2 i) e( _$ G( u% [2 e- n
There are some that would have you not use certain words.
0 D/ x3 [+ j' R5 P3 x9 r+ aThere are 400,000 words in the English language and there are 7+ T$ r3 x: G4 s: x. k0 ?; t
of them you can't say on television. What a ratio that is.
9 m: T7 p( h1 R$ O Q5 M! }7 u399,993 to 7. They must really be bad. They'd have to be outrageous
; i3 W7 |* G6 K' m; o9 g* A& Dto be seperated from a group that large. All of you over here,you 7,
) q' E4 j- r; `& dBad Words. That's what they told us they were, remember?8 A& j6 o; N: a: R1 \
"That's a bad word!" No bad words, bad thoughts, bad intentions,: @* C) w# y! s; X
and words. You know the 7, don't you, that you can't say on television?
% t$ u0 o& ~7 E7 F"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
4 D/ _7 n) ?9 j WThose are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that'll infect your soul," Z' P( D9 p+ i0 l$ l
curve your spine, and keep the country from winning the war.6 s. Z- n) H+ J, ~/ n
"Shit, Piss, Fuck, Cunt, CockSucker, MotherFucker, and Tits"
# J0 b. P- @* N$ P# UWow! ...and Tits doesn't even belong on the list. That is such a friendly; s: ?* L2 { S1 Y2 y
sounding word. It sounds like a nickname, right? "Hey, Tits, come here,& X1 l4 x" J" y: Z: D: M
man. Hey Tits, meet Toots. Toots, Tits. Tits, Toots." It sounds like a7 j$ i- V# L4 h' \2 `' V2 M
snack, doesn't it? Yes, I know, it is a snack. I don't mean your sexist
0 C' G& `. R- q8 {3 I1 W$ qsnack. I mean New Nabisco Tits!, and new Cheese Tits, Corn Tits,
: D) b/ {! p2 O; kPizza Tits, Sesame Tits, Onion Tits, Tater Tits. "Betcha Can't Eat Just
8 {6 a" P2 o' t( qOne." That's true. I usually switch off. But I mean, that word does8 Z$ @1 M' t" M
not belong on the list. Actually none of the words belong on the list,- S2 _& c' M" M- T; b: s
but you can understand why some of them are there. I'm not
- F: r+ d0 _" M! @completely insensetive to people's feelings. I can understand why* c- z% ?0 f$ z$ Z
some of those words got on the list, like CockSucker and
1 V2 n( t# w' X4 `MotherFucker. Those are heavyweight words. There is a lot going on
/ J% C' V- b/ Hthere. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling.
2 }: S; d J# j+ X1 _ |9 UI mean, they're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend
. ~% u' L; f6 g4 d" C3 f& v5 X8 c swith. And those Ks, those are agressive sounds. They just jump out at; s- w/ _# |: H
you like "coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer. coCKsuCKer, motherfuCKer."
3 n+ f' [/ X, P4 |1 yIt's like an assualt on you. We mentioned Shit earlier, and 2 of the* l: q5 p4 C' J6 d8 ?
other 4-letter Anglo-Saxon words are Piss and Cunt, which go
0 d& x5 [% f- b% c9 itogether of course. A little accedental humor there. The reason that
5 V \+ b6 Y/ hPiss and Cunt are on the list is because a long time ago, there were
8 B% Z$ N) G$ O& a2 _! wcertain ladies that said "Those are the 2 I am not going to say. I. m! G; K9 s o1 f. _
don't mind Fuck and Shit but 'P' and 'C' are out.", which led to such
: i, C& w3 E! q5 g; \- Cstupid sentences as "Okay you fuckers, I'm going to tinckle now."; |: H7 T/ \$ E" @0 L! [
And, of course, the word Fuck. I don't really, well that's more. t$ I$ P$ |. L0 j
accedental humor, I don't wanna get into that now because I think
" m: P" F4 @1 w8 Sit takes to long. But I do mean that. I think the word Fuck is a very% R z5 t% E r% t4 q
imprortant word. It is the beginning of life, yet it is a word we use to. X! o4 H) A" X
hurt one another quite often. People much wiser than I am said,3 a2 `7 ` M7 R
"I'd rather have my son watch a film with 2 people making love
1 q: n% w' H' d* i, C8 x( p0 ythan 2 people trying to kill one another. I, of course, can agree. It is8 P1 i4 D# D' G) J8 v
a great sentence. I wish I knew who said it first. I agree with that but
3 j/ M9 { m f/ u; v. b& _2 p ]% EI like to take it a step further. I'd like to substitute the word Fuck for
( p+ s' r4 P$ E8 ~6 ?$ Nthe word Kill in all of those movie cliches we grew up with. "Okay,# s& N' Z$ r ^: Q
Sherrif, we're gonna Fuck you now, but we're gonna Fuck you slow."0 w+ d" L( N" T- L6 b
So maybe next year I'll have a whole fuckin' ramp on the N word.
; E+ S. o0 x! f+ L. `! RI hope so. Those are the 7 you can never say on television, under any& r4 W8 X; v; K; _5 F7 z; s6 x
circumstanses. You just cannot say them ever ever ever. Not even& G+ k2 i3 k5 L: L+ x" w
clinically. You cannot weave them in on the panel with Doc, and Ed,' j( o4 y9 i4 l8 b
and Johnny. I mean, it is just impossible. Forget tHose 7. They're out.
% n$ ^5 i" e: h& B" f9 g2 rBut there are some 2-way words, those double-meaning words.
! T- E( a" K1 y/ ZRemember the ones you giggled at in sixth grade? "...And the cock
2 E Q+ e& D. N8 A0 [9 H# ^1 j0 oCROWED 3 times" "Hey, tha cock CROWED 3 times. ha ha ha ha. Hey, it's in
: s( k3 M5 [2 T2 d/ Wthe bible. ha ha ha ha. There are some 2-way words, like it is okay for
# l0 Y) q' [7 P/ n$ KKirk Youdi to say "Roberto Clametti has 2 balls on him.", but he can't
" u% B- y; n: |, O! c0 psay "I think he hurt his balls on that play, Tony. Don't you? He's holding
4 ^( A4 ?- N5 ]' O- u+ ]& r! _them. He must've hurt them, by God." and the other 2-way word that
" o% q+ c7 Z$ F6 H* W8 M' p: k- D& \goes with that one is Prik. It's okay if it happens to your finger. You
, I6 k3 i( o6 vcan prik your finger but don't finger your prik. No,no. |
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