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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?! p( Q5 w, t1 u8 ^5 ?0 P" m7 P
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Let's face it8 B" E+ e* S! g' o2 ^: |+ S
English is a stupid language. }4 Z3 \/ Y! q) O0 B3 H) Y# ] b
There is no egg in the eggplant% T k; s- ^% `
No ham in the hamburger( ~& K, i/ l) F+ \ u
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
( z: v$ r0 i, B# O+ lEnglish muffins were not invented in England
1 d- x5 K& N3 n+ j, K0 |French fries were not invented in France.! B6 N( v4 J3 ~7 O$ V$ e% A
' l4 ^2 D# M" r+ ^We sometimes take English for granted) k9 e) `. Z+ W5 f9 V- C
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that! [! ^4 d% @& {
Quicksand takes you down slowly
/ ]. |; J1 n0 ]9 l( {5 Q7 [1 q FBoxing rings are square8 M3 D: Q7 |" R2 z( d/ s- Z; \
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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& e6 r1 l4 T8 i) PIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
8 t; l% B( b) o, m5 _If the plural of tooth is teeth
; _. g7 U! H/ U8 tShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth9 M8 s& z; m9 K4 R
If the teacher taught,
0 c1 j% u' F, EWhy didn't the preacher praught.# a7 _9 n7 u6 M1 w% D4 z
8 f8 G, k" M! a( _( o+ ZIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
9 Q Q0 K, W8 K$ C: E* Z3 I, l4 F! eWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?/ A4 Q4 ?" U9 f; Q
Why do people recite at a play* A7 [$ M9 l- d: c) B" U' o( r
Yet play at a recital?+ Q' N( F7 o2 p: T& H* C
Park on driveways and
: r; ]( k9 h( u5 _. V' e+ N$ |Drive on parkways
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# q0 H. s# H+ x; L5 VYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
$ L. h9 e' k% j& I( U5 U' aOf a language where a house can burn up as- F/ z9 a- `+ W
It burns down7 B6 J% N1 ` {& p
And in which you fill in a form # r2 d: p& }3 L; p) S" z* [' F' k6 |
By filling it out
6 r/ X! \* w, v+ t/ kAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!+ {+ I% o; k$ l- d# s
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English was invented by people, not computers7 X* l8 n& J: T+ k* ~/ u/ l
And it reflects the creativity of the human race: ]- E1 O* o& y1 ?8 B. x& b3 T8 C
(Which of course isn't a race at all)1 ^4 m9 ^4 y3 ]! R( G
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That is why
6 W' w- t0 ]$ o( |4 lWhen the stars are out they are visible
, g, g# O5 V6 r) |2 kBut when the lights are out they are invisible
$ X+ p- D- O9 n7 y6 HAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch/ Y9 @+ Y/ o, _ u
It starts
/ X [! Y$ R; W1 CBut when I wind up this observation,
$ s. ]) }& I/ u Q1 mIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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