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呼应海尼尼:一个男人的心声

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鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!* ~) U4 ]3 ^" V) }
请注意,以下序号都是1不是误写
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8 S- E6 A9 q0 R# U  N1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
, x, }8 D; {; L1,男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫- d- m' `8 k' b' N
; _8 ~1 L. Y; M
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
3 h4 e, z4 _4 h) D7 _9 ~" B* W5 mdown.' _, Z" o: I3 {2 c. \$ a% @( M) d
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
0 V; w/ t" q& I: }" ^# yyou) N6 {: y' n1 [3 t1 k* D+ o
leaving it down.  n" G/ `0 J/ o+ |2 j  p, H& }- f
1,学会使用马桶盖,你是个大姑娘了,马桶盖要是翻起来了,你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来,你们需要放下去,你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去?
1 I1 W2 I. L2 E! _! x# u
7 w0 M& {. H5 `8 `) g1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.2 X/ S5 z7 @* O, M  h
Let it be.4 y" s' k( o: ?0 I0 l. h: `- n7 j+ @
1,周日的体育,无论它像满月还是潮汐,随他去
, \& A1 k& d& |& g& q1 N- C1 n2 N: C0 G! p( N5 }
1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
6 v% ?6 r. E! X3 c+ z# m3 tthat way.
* A; v/ C" L  b; s" k3 u1,购物不是体育。不,也别指望我们能那么想!
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1. Crying is blackmail.# W& {5 j$ I8 ?! G' N
1,哭泣是敲诈3 P  h! A9 z) \4 a% u4 v
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1. Ask for what you want.
' {! e/ Y9 `3 g3 R' E& M8 o9 VLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!1 ]9 B# r" M9 a
Strong hints do not work!
7 D) Q" z- Z" h  q9 c+ O' JObvious hints do not work!
6 S9 r7 a: E; m& }* r1 L& xJust say it!: ~! ?) P" P/ z. [/ P
1,你想要什么就说6 o5 F) X$ I) ]& H6 Q
我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!! w, ^5 l8 r) U9 O
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every : T( B1 i, W) X3 J- x
question.
3 a  h1 J0 R' S7 s3 l1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 (意思是,丈夫仅仅说是,不是,妻子不满意)
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2 o  t" \, Z% t$ d0 z: v: n: n1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it.  That's- z# ^- T, z) c9 |9 D( f0 L
what we do.
1 N, H) m5 `( a9 ^/ T. sSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.' W5 t9 Y7 f: Q& b
1,如果你有麻烦,可以来找我们帮助解决,可是不要仅仅为了获取同情,那是你们女朋友的责任。
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem.  See a doctor.' ~% X3 B3 u& g
1,你要是头疼了17个月,那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.* l7 x* N! p# O$ H
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.8 |1 L1 G, J2 f6 Q* {4 ?
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及,事实上,我们说的话7天后就作废了( N& Q3 B0 O) q  a
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
2 }! U) H6 ^: o6 y. l7 i9 kto act like soap opera guys.
' T- ?, ]3 n6 L& J' j7 u8 D& o7 k1,如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密(性感品牌)的女孩子们,那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们4 w: W+ c- q6 M
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
7 `0 X* m+ y2 J+ J1,你要是觉得你胖,那你八成就胖,别问我们
( ~* h0 V6 f$ i' ?: Y" Q# Z
& `+ {  |6 r" f1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
! b6 L8 K3 j5 b: W+ J. A9 z+ Rmakes you sad or angry, we meant  the other one.2 \# n( w; F$ T1 a
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思,而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒,那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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(谁有工夫继续一下,谢谢)! g/ ^) v& h. C0 {* u) _4 o
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it4 u) @/ n5 {: P0 [3 A% w9 k
done. Not both.
  r2 H+ ^5 n& O; {: O7 qIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
  a9 ^% L) X+ o2 I5 V
" u6 Y+ N) c0 ?8 @1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
+ s0 z$ T( D& z2 U. V+ p5 j$ j0 }: tcommercials.3 I5 A! {  W' H9 @! w0 O) h6 {1 m
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.- r1 c8 F& N$ Q4 l
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
% K! K/ u9 p: N1 A' y1 }* hPeach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
7 A- O$ E6 d; a4 NWe have no idea what mauve is.. \3 M& W0 s1 M2 Q7 S

2 U! m! o3 }( w- e' ?7 J/ h- w1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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( F8 h$ i) I  b1 o4 X0 \% k1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
1 B0 R& H# u* q- y- T$ q% ]3 znothing's wrong.) v' S+ g/ f; W- T
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
! R5 e, d. j5 Q# Y. h8 |  O: y/ E4 \' ?: s8 ~8 w' I4 q+ C2 J: P5 D) v
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer; x- l) T; f! ^
you don't want to hear.3 p3 c1 E0 Y3 f% x5 i' M4 m

  [5 P/ U) m$ M# G) ]: m1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
5 _  |( @; j0 D1 |0 f; d3 k7 t" lfine...Really.( X$ N; z2 H; P# G3 o% ^

9 M- u  [( }( ?( O. R3 n/ e1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to; @1 a& C" l3 o( W
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.) s9 A/ |8 Z" ^9 v5 T

$ k% f, S! h; @# R8 {: R7 @3 M& {1. You have enough clothes.+ J+ b5 X1 }8 ?7 l" P$ B

5 Z& x) k# N1 P1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!4 w! w3 v- ], w1 Z# A  j5 {6 y
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1. Thank you for reading this.1 V* K* ?4 U0 Z, u6 \
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;* I( B3 k2 q$ q& _6 x( Z& X
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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0 l" f, H6 {. O- YPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
; y7 y- W3 h; h: g* C/ k0 @Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06 | 显示全部楼层
funny
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:10 | 显示全部楼层
试试哈。+ a- b; ?* E) {( @9 O+ R

& G, n4 W1 k- [0 g5 ]9 n& o4 _1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want itdone. Not both.If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.你或者让我们去做事情或者告诉我们你想怎么做,但是千万别同时要求我们。你如果知道怎么样做最好,那么自己个儿做吧。) r6 b% U$ y, b9 u' K
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?! z# s2 n, O9 y, g8 `

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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.( s: s! _6 j" {. |
我们和克里斯托福。哥伦布一样不需要指导!( p  Q' U0 E  F0 [; ^5 \2 I% R

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6 ], {' b9 R! @1 K# y1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is.6 V$ ~& c- a: V5 T, Y) [- `/ M" D9 C
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。. t7 \* ?; J% G, b" U9 N

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" H3 Y' d; ?8 L1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
! n) Y6 }! G5 u9 F0 n3 S( }如果痒了就挠挠,我们就爱做实事。2 o& h5 e- C8 u% Y  K  E

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- C2 o. M8 ^7 t1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act likenothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.! Q+ q* f+ D( R; t% s
如果我们问发生什么事了?你说没事,那就没事啊。我们知道你们在撒谎,可是那根本不值得讨论。/ C  ^3 D& o2 O" j: I) K$ Y6 i& m

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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answeryou don't want to hear.3 E6 D( i; T! r  `& S# ~6 N; e
如果你一定要问一个你不想知道答案的问题,那么就别指望能听到你想要听的答案。
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 04:10 PM:
9 D. W* v% }; yALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.Peach, for example, is a fruit, not   A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We have no idea what mauve is." \) c6 d- `% ]( P& T
所有的男人只认识16种颜色,就像没有背景的窗户(这个很生硬,不知道什么意思)。桃子就是种水果而不是什么见鬼的桃色,同理南瓜也就是种水果。我们更不知道浅紫色是什么鬼东西。8 O1 m8 c/ L8 [1 ^0 `
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这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置
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还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:26 | 显示全部楼层
1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Isfine...Really.. w5 a: R/ G' f1 P! p2 N
如果我们要去哪里,你无论穿什么都绝对很好。。。真的不骗你
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared todiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
' ?" R4 V) ~' R不要问我们在关心什么,除非你已经可以讨论诸如棒球、橄榄球或高尔夫等话题。
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1. You have enough clothes.& i/ s( U8 ^8 F& z4 \% p" j! a9 L! F
你的衣服足够多了/ ]) o* y" D; N6 M, R. s' v

" `" `+ b7 J* O7 b7 \' m8 X/ C1. You have too many shoes.. n) h7 J/ t& A& q
你的鞋子也太多了吧+ Y8 Y7 S+ O/ R

- k% _, M" n4 M1 ?: D7 Y1. I am in shape.  Round IS a shape!
+ L& P3 J6 g# P我很有型啊,你能说球型不是一种型吗?
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1. Thank you for reading this.
, f: ~, G8 h1 X' E# f, B多谢你能看完这个9 Y2 K& q! k1 O  [
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.. S3 u& k( N0 z4 C) N$ @" ~
我知道今晚我得睡沙发了,但你知道吗,男人们一点儿都不会介意这个的,不就是野营嘛。
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 15:28 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 三思 at 2005-11-11 04:26 PM:4 N6 s" K* _1 N% s  g& q4 q

3 s! o$ m+ n. ^0 E, {9 k( ~- ^这里的windows是指微软的窗口平台,default setting就是大家什么不设的普通颜色设置# K$ {( |2 ?5 Q

$ s( i7 W7 n: F0 Y, D6 ~; v还是海尼尼心眼好,办实事!

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应该说还是海妮妮心眼实,办好事。嘿嘿
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玩玩,献丑了哈
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 15:35 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
最后一句真绝阿
鲜花(1394) 鸡蛋(16)
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-11 03:26 PM:, d3 l. H: M: C, ^
1. You have enough clothes.
0 v' a3 m7 f0 Z' Z  i& i你的衣服足够多了
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) u5 d/ d% r& [1. You have too many shoes.
" Y' x1 c( D* R1 z: ]8 y: S你的鞋子也太多了吧

% J$ B- T3 ~' D1 b) B4 _, U- D这两句话我经常对LD说,但是她说NO。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 17:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
鲜花(634) 鸡蛋(5)
 楼主| 发表于 2005-11-11 17:38 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say duringcommercials.不管什么时候,能不能把你必须要说的话留到广告时间说?
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----这句话我劳工常说,我就。。。。忍了。尤其看《幸存者〉的时候,电话都不接。但是观看期间他可以跟我说话,不许我说
鲜花(10) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 20:39 | 显示全部楼层
1. Ask for what you want.0 _. W0 D5 R3 N4 l, z
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!' M0 r  N, v( a
Strong hints do not work!
/ S! e7 ]. [2 M1 z; Z. oObvious hints do not work!3 e) \1 U8 _7 e( Q
Just say it!
: Y( P- Z- c2 E% T( R) S% r* K1,你想要什么就说
* X; y# b& V0 z我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管用,强烈按时不管用,明显的暗示也不管用!想干吗你明说!
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$ ~9 W0 W* j, u5 q关于这一条,我老公只认准了一条hint,只要我在晚上洗了澡,头发湿淋淋的下楼和他说话,他就坚决认为我是在暗示他炒饭了!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 蓝海 at 2005-11-11 09:39 PM:& }; i4 ^8 W" f
1. Ask for what you want.$ L8 N2 Q. I  E# r3 H4 B- j( k/ ]  D, H
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
' ^9 ]  p$ i7 z5 XStrong hints do not work!
" u  T& {/ P# _" r8 {6 |! M6 v9 aObvious hints do not work!
  N) K2 N$ k# [, @* Q* xJust say it!
" W- h. u, o. }* M/ \, H1 ?2 l1,你想要什么就说
+ I: R1 B9 {4 h7 }* ~4 H我们再说得清楚点,小暗示不管 ...
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瓦赛
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 00:49 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 09:33 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 01:49 AM:
. {8 s  |$ C: d& r& l被呼应的那部分在哪?还没看过瘾哪!要不,哪位给个连接????
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7 F- A- [2 e0 L0 O' u. ^

: v( ~. t/ D! w  E咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿  b! E8 s  q( C0 g; e  e
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http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
鲜花(86) 鸡蛋(3)
发表于 2005-11-14 15:59 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 海妮妮 at 2005-11-14 09:33:
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, O* A& B. y" V. Y' W" k  b
2 K. {( t% G6 ?( _2 l& u咳,就是偶转贴的那个“老婆的心得”,在这儿
# S7 y" c3 C  `. m+ B9 P; B' @0 W6 j6 }; X1 p1 @3 n6 i
http://web.edmontonchina.cn/viewthread.php?tid=33628&fpage=1
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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。8 u! Z5 z9 d  O; F/ s
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还想问问你的体会呢!
鲜花(6) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2005-11-14 16:21 | 显示全部楼层
Originally posted by 今天闲着 at 2005-11-14 04:59 PM:! y: g7 e- f% w

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这个早看了,想起11来现在还笑得受不了了!以后有机会一定要试一下。, }8 k" J) P  u5 n. _
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还想问问你的体会呢!
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! [+ S$ e3 X* R( z. l1 U- I- A体会?8 w) R# Y2 |3 r) s

1 c4 R' h  ^. [9 j3 S6 J回答到那个帖子下面了
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