 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!4 C$ I, \9 H( x5 T1 e9 {5 V
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写7 B0 L/ g% }! D: ^9 Y
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
5 j! g3 v6 P z0 j1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫/ ]) c$ u! F$ b- {
, l) m6 t! j# _5 f: w3 S; n1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
3 a4 u# c1 ~. K1 w6 wdown./ L; [* L# h7 n& n1 @. C
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about ) ^& v- _5 T; t, m1 v
you: Q& ]) X i1 U9 O
leaving it down.
5 Q8 x& u9 v; V |; Q: ?1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
9 o3 h' X* ?9 D) QLet it be.& o8 O" g! B' h( V
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it, U. u7 C! o" z/ m
that way.: d- ^) U$ p" S( |
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.
' d. q/ d; }2 q1，哭泣是敲诈
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" K: Q& }6 m/ ^. B1. Ask for what you want.
/ C) H, A* f* E- Z# Y0 x& wLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!* ^# g& {- p, s; N, ^( r- M$ y
Strong hints do not work!
2 h1 U. m) ]6 | a# wObvious hints do not work!% X# @. G" v' U, R% W3 D1 x, p
Just say it!
' k- e- t W$ h9 ]) U1，你想要什么就说: u) n0 a! c$ ?8 S: ^
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every 0 V4 S: A2 D5 r7 @7 Q) V1 q
question.
$ K3 t, g6 M8 ]( {& q1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
7 f7 A7 g& r- e* z5 J" nwhat we do.
% `. K: B8 c) w6 Y8 b, v" xSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.' p6 x/ i" s; U. T6 V, j) l4 r
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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) X9 D& e: S1 E3 Z/ M1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.7 L/ D1 @' ^4 c# H
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去3 u: ^7 z4 f: h# [9 E
8 D+ i+ i$ w' ] O8 W$ D1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.) L: m0 J& x: L0 v, U) L: a+ s9 Y, W
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
3 y$ D0 r3 W7 z" H) P* t1 M: T我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了0 Q @2 b/ r) X: b0 Q
0 N! A, r5 S! B/ {* M- W2 V1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us' g% Y% S- T. l' j
to act like soap opera guys.
5 p1 B0 E" S8 \, c: r& h! P1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.- X2 f3 y1 {$ t' S( k# V
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们; ], Q9 u" T0 n9 ]% e4 R1 f: x
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways# ]9 } E! G5 r6 a$ n
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.6 m8 f: G5 _8 Y. U& s
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。8 X( _: A& p5 X- o8 P
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
8 C6 t; M9 d" S! P& i# E a1 A1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it H1 p/ l+ x5 D, ?& _
done. Not both.5 Y/ B ^. n( Z; G7 i' q n
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
5 I/ l9 I9 m1 o# _! LPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
+ W& |% l# b) d4 |5 BWe have no idea what mauve is.* n; I* ` b1 g8 b, D! `
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.. y) ^* S/ H+ d/ n
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
3 E2 U7 X9 [: I4 d% ~# Znothing's wrong.) P7 R/ ]; A$ {9 i3 l4 }
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer w5 s* c2 r2 I) T0 @+ X
you don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
: T" z& }- b* [. O/ ?! U, V$ I6 b' ifine...Really.
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4 N- ^: b$ A# j L7 u# C2 `1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to) t2 f. \2 O3 a% u! v
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.6 t2 j/ G5 |+ W6 {
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1. You have enough clothes., L0 B6 m( a$ b% C
5 L0 l: g' i4 ]. o6 c1. You have too many shoes.
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( N9 Y" W6 |, v- M1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!+ z$ H& P. L+ G$ G
+ n* L/ ~5 D) k" G9 Z1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;. _+ T( g3 w! i! N
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping./ u3 e' Y v$ P7 v( r! ]9 [; N/ Z
5 n$ m: g: r! V$ T4 J! L. k- U( n+ ZPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.' v) R c2 c! _
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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