 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
) U+ _' P9 {$ ~ @) \请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
- i1 j6 q$ e S6 i& Y: @1 }1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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- p1 f8 m& K% c5 h, c+ [1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
$ }9 Y5 v2 b$ d6 Q. v* S$ L! ddown.
8 H6 b/ D. J4 H' M* rWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down.
: y5 m6 ~! @' X, t" }" t1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？7 b8 p6 g) l! v) A" Z5 ~1 [& c/ B* W
8 ?) e0 [ H [- M. g9 r1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
y! d* |: k2 s: n6 W2 E% ILet it be.
+ ]" _+ ?) {, R; u |' @1 \1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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, P" ], ^* M' s5 d+ A6 Z1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
; }. r9 s+ ^* n* Hthat way.
* v$ U& o0 _% U8 M" B1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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: q- b7 u7 S" B: |9 ~- n1. Crying is blackmail.( j* i" A$ E; o
1，哭泣是敲诈
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/ e; L2 Z- m2 p1. Ask for what you want.
4 U+ m7 N/ A4 K- P; k5 QLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!& x9 y4 [% w/ m3 G3 A
Strong hints do not work!
1 T/ u$ | i: m! \Obvious hints do not work!. |0 T6 H2 ~5 ^! {
Just say it!; [" H" q! f% q# j* G
1，你想要什么就说
( M3 [9 d8 d* k, Q; r我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！5 o) B/ k/ H0 ~) E5 l
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every 4 a2 i2 h4 E5 q+ y6 H2 {" P: z7 \9 v
question.
& o+ U l3 X Z; J' J; V! r% Z1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）1 f3 B4 P4 j! {! O4 Z' }
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's( x& \5 j/ q1 k" o& X
what we do.# R8 k5 @% P7 E) A: [
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
: w) s- p% r3 d( O% e1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。5 \" \& _6 Y$ M& V3 t
6 @& `5 z: |+ A& n' Z1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
U5 I- R8 Q, U' k2 P" d, r1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去& ?; \5 Q$ k7 T& W: b, G1 N4 g9 S7 G
/ S# J4 z$ Z, _ X1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.6 g2 v4 ]# o8 Y" U. |) S+ E: o
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
: M0 _& T6 v7 H& h6 e7 U, u我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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& E% P# @% ]! \# o1 \$ D1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us% F' O/ h. f X! n- P
to act like soap opera guys. B+ A$ q: a5 Y3 g
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们: c5 Y' i, r$ M0 X) w
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
3 H2 m6 l0 a- h8 P4 h0 K1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们6 V" Q/ b$ K0 w6 i
$ N1 S9 k7 r+ f+ P- n1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
/ t, J: G: R( zmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.: C1 z8 Z0 S Q& a
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。$ Y0 y& i& e% }1 i( y2 a
" N+ @& t8 U& t8 [6 o- R) I( l% F1 s3 A（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢） l- C8 |% W( d+ a
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
2 N7 c3 r e0 [. z) ]/ T' Wdone. Not both.
+ I! A: [5 }3 [& H& aIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.9 G* v0 c! z$ c# _* n5 s u; Z
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
4 m8 f0 d3 @; f+ m- Ycommercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we. v+ `6 R, ~0 @" h) j5 v/ \
4 v8 j- q$ X) ]7 P# o1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
* @1 y3 ?/ m% w/ W) _Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
& H0 F E5 U( D0 }; v. ~1 VWe have no idea what mauve is.
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that." m% Q' t0 E# c( C( B9 B& q4 ~
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
0 S: q* \ k8 u; p" x. ?nothing's wrong.: f, Q! y1 _8 P
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer D9 v: u- E0 z. i
you don't want to hear.8 A/ h4 |! X5 L$ E# B
1 P M( T, ~9 L) C0 _- B+ e1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is1 Z: e' U" j s6 N; p6 o1 v/ _* Q) f
fine...Really.( v( J( F8 V" H; Z: [) x. R
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
& h, J0 t2 C! t, ~discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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$ j) G& h9 b- J8 M( w4 w1. You have enough clothes., Y- d* P" f, i7 i K# w) q) t
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1. You have too many shoes.
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3 s. I3 `) _8 T8 o- o) J1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!. H. i. ]8 R9 T$ z/ U. ^3 o( F
( D$ {. c5 A- X$ l4 j, U. w$ W1. Thank you for reading this.6 n& j8 u* \6 q2 O" P s
% ^. @0 G& {0 Z1 j. P! sYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;7 S. q5 V8 c! t5 Z6 t. R
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
; m5 c4 L6 t8 h+ D" ~, W# ePass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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