 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
' G0 W$ M5 K/ g' V; a, Y- ~请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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" ^* Q" J: j& J: @9 M- q/ m1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
* Y; q( o5 M" Y5 W8 s. {5 w1 }1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫6 [' F. v) L) w- F0 x
7 C8 l, R; {7 X3 m& Q, G& w! `' _1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it% l: @9 N0 P8 n% x1 v! S M
down.
7 P2 n6 V6 e' V7 e+ ?8 XWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
0 W! t; O; K* l. qyou
$ H- n5 W6 K2 rleaving it down./ j# ?3 j" x4 i4 G, X% b: z
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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/ v$ L- z& G2 V+ C6 S; t1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
: @+ p9 @$ W2 j" r, \! V+ ?3 `Let it be. r7 i; Y6 w+ |. {3 G% O( t
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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. F7 y8 w# ~' H# E0 Q0 @1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it! N1 a$ n+ A. h8 F2 G, ]
that way.+ Q* t) Y Q6 z
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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( S) @! o/ g4 a) B4 F1. Crying is blackmail.
4 C7 I8 x$ N+ q. R& I: J7 e1，哭泣是敲诈# ?# E( T" m/ p* X
1 }7 ?2 F/ p6 \7 F* @1. Ask for what you want.
0 Z& ~& M* n: ^; U' U# d1 D( _Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!" P! `* @. V" t( V2 Z) J3 r/ V
Strong hints do not work!
6 G5 |# p! ^* e) |- a) hObvious hints do not work!8 i9 M) r! W" J( S0 c: S" K
Just say it!# A+ l; h8 y7 K! [
1，你想要什么就说* c, a: _" ^: c0 O) b& N3 `
我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！+ [: q2 N# A4 \6 m) v. F' h
' {0 m2 ?% O2 u& S0 o1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
$ |1 `: \4 [+ Lquestion.7 ?' w3 J& v5 v4 ^
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）& ]8 r# Z; G; e! c' r# h
- y; ~0 J7 a" X4 u) h* c' f. f8 ]1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
* B6 C. n8 q" N, bwhat we do.
$ H% @% C9 ^) @! _7 V$ ISympathy is what your girlfriends are for.7 p8 F, G6 Z2 s/ T* Z
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。& Q e0 @% Q( n; M5 C u
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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.1 P# T" f9 A/ @' R4 V9 x
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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6 v. c- w* p% q0 S+ ]- a7 G1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
$ z* H; @+ F u8 H) Q& LIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.- O: Z" U# H0 s! \3 l
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了$ q* S9 _7 Z ^( p/ Z
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us5 W+ V4 v0 ?% ~2 }
to act like soap opera guys.2 o/ y& E4 p4 Q* }! n" j. v. X+ g2 ]" c
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们' ]) D7 ]: w4 y( ?4 \
/ F7 U' ^* Z- \6 N1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.( ^/ ]& m! o7 S" E1 N# e0 t
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
- |/ t% [8 t1 O$ `makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.$ C( L+ j5 [7 p" A+ U% e0 L
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。3 h0 n9 @: e6 U2 G
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（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）. R5 { ^; ^4 f, B
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
. @0 B/ @* |" Q9 e6 Ddone. Not both./ ?$ F; c6 U+ e3 w1 q/ m
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during7 N- ]& ~" N3 L# u) a
commercials.
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/ s! M- ~" Q$ m0 s: c4 |+ L1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
- ~8 f* m I# X' ]) H3 ?Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.) A1 y) r( [. U/ X3 C: Y* O3 u
We have no idea what mauve is.
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& z8 }/ K7 T7 V+ ~0 O1 H* t1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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, w/ @) V x* w5 r# |* ?6 r# M3 ?1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like6 l7 E5 Z! u% Y$ ^+ l1 K2 M
nothing's wrong.
0 M& _: X+ |$ W7 R4 S9 LWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle. `; M/ l+ l g+ @% g
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1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer) \. u* G) N7 I: Q8 p' `0 v4 q0 \8 P i
you don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is+ g8 A! K% T& B7 }2 V0 s* C: P
fine...Really.
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9 V9 d! O% f4 ^8 I. N% \1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to# l. d7 b+ O5 H* p9 v8 g0 n( T* z" ~
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.$ H- Z" }+ a9 v. ]# |! m$ V0 p
/ W9 G0 I* }* U5 V$ b) S# y& ^1. You have too many shoes.% f# C, v1 A+ \: G
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
, w7 V! l9 w1 \4 hBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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2 Y0 F: t/ j2 E9 T* @1 l% l$ X0 }Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
6 [; v1 i2 S f% d+ S! PPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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