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In the garden of my heart

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发表于 2006-6-25 01:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!
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" I8 d5 g1 s9 VIn the garden of my heart
( ^) G2 _. }# z; i/ b3 r" o4 kYou planted a tree) }- x: j" m) c" y, G
From sunset til dawn" u: ^" j) |+ ~( X6 l# A- t
Through darkness to light. l3 ]8 \  W$ Q9 ]5 D+ L# i
Nourished with my soul9 l5 }4 P% F2 G' p% _+ k
Devoured my sorrow by thee- Y# ?% ~2 S$ y3 l9 B' D

' t! k& d9 z' Y6 @0 `In the memory of my life
) S8 G4 v, V  @You planted a dream* x# b: {9 C! M3 k# j2 q" l) y; e: k
Should the sky fall down on me, H+ S% O. A' q: m
May promises fade in the sea
9 W+ E  Y1 ?& u( X. LSewing back every broken pieces0 h: h+ q# A. e# O% U- q
Bursting the love out of me" M3 f% r2 }: b; ~# y

" k, \* U" y+ T$ t[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:08 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
3 H7 o- ?2 U# c* |9 {. N! w: e听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!
0 l. `% `9 y2 p+ [" m' P  X# x2 [: x3 S! }
In the garden of my heart( B" N5 M7 I7 p! f3 u
You planted a tree# t6 K: B+ G' T; G( g
From sunset til dawn
; S0 K( V1 V! c3 N$ C% R6 B7 JThrough darkness to light
8 @9 S8 n' S2 U% {  l+ q0 eNourished with my soul
) e' b* [3 ]! BDevoured my so ...

5 z1 P. h3 D7 D1 }( X4 W5 F: [8 c/ x/ g! D) u* w& a/ n4 n
眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?, B& `4 s, G) R

' C: h4 G  {, L写得真好。% s* h4 i- e4 o6 G0 b, d$ k
( s/ `4 N$ y8 \' M1 u1 H
加精加精!
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:20 | 显示全部楼层
哥们儿,你没喝多吧?没事就过来烧烟啊!
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
汗!居然有2单词不认识。:(
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发表于 2006-6-25 03:41 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表7 _% ]/ _0 A6 `5 O1 O( |
眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?# a( E6 K: x9 l" z* \9 J# g" ^  Y6 v
写得真好。
9 p2 W" J# L5 ]* B0 g加精加精!

. X* u4 F6 `+ Q我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗
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发表于 2006-6-25 05:31 | 显示全部楼层
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。
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发表于 2006-6-29 09:57 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表
1 a/ T% W0 S& {$ M+ k6 Z8 `如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

  t9 Y. ~. H9 s五月JJ这个意境,想想实在是罗曼蒂克,不过在爱屯,海天相接是没有了,只有在湖畔雪山了:)
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发表于 2006-6-29 11:06 | 显示全部楼层
Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
" J: n7 V9 a. Y7 M+ M' [/ O/ g& ^3 s/ O
, ^& z( g% K1 p  |" `Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-6-29 18:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表7 A$ C7 ]$ e( c6 l4 @
Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.+ T, G8 }* L; m0 }/ s) I% a2 }

/ K* W% C3 I7 ^% F. N0 l& rSewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.
3 s' |5 z% B+ F# j' ?4 X  o

+ F; T4 Z7 C8 K  k/ _1 W( |9 PThanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.
  \/ f, n8 {4 _% H3 }7 S5 h
, T* A5 S2 ~5 F; v- f: V3 Q( r1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".
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' {2 \% N6 r3 ^8 S( R5 U3 P2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2006-6-30 01:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民,但很喜气!很有乐在其中的意境啊!
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发表于 2006-7-2 10:50 | 显示全部楼层
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。7 w  t9 Q: B. L# T" N% s+ ?4 x
9 ?5 C; I: u$ m. M
Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
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发表于 2006-7-2 13:50 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
# x+ {+ _6 k: [2 ^thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
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Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

3 ?9 d- _# c3 l( ?& |- p  u5 o. w) P. u  ^& c. M- E, X3 k
诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-7-2 13:56 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
( s* ?/ S5 z  f3 l; `; c% K: D, T" b% Dthee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
6 b: ^2 D& G3 Z$ u& r: A( R' V5 G) b1 n8 U$ f; Y& n* V* r
Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
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; C  R! z$ K; q+ d) [- @' |有啊,有很多经典的例子。
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$ w, K/ {5 I8 l5 h5 {+ m) S比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》) Z9 S2 C/ L, D2 S- E1 w
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Don't weep at my grave
* y  e5 e$ x$ H# {For I am not there,6 b8 u0 `2 I' B3 [! `+ ]! r+ A- |
I've a date with a butterfly  h9 _$ e& ?( Y/ c) g9 U
To dance on the air./ e) r/ Z) x1 C1 }( E
If I'm missed, find a flower,8 E6 ^  {6 G  C& V* ~
I'll be there too,0 ?3 i0 P1 A( U( W, b. ~
Sniffing it's fragrance; z& c; x2 [: o- R1 j
Right next to you.( ]6 _) r' ?; v3 D  r/ `

5 c& Q% L) J* R, `Don't be sad8 P) D1 O% O5 T, J
When you remember me,8 \0 L% Y! n5 u
For I'm singing in the sunshine,
" e& G! h: ^7 y$ ]! L' ?6 y& Q+ ^Wild and free,
4 r1 R( ~" t( D0 R; N' N& KFlirting with the lighting,4 O3 H# |8 l8 K1 J) E& k7 Y
Playing tag with the wind,
2 e3 H5 y6 w: ]Chasing the thunder: j# v1 r9 T7 Z' u8 b/ h" w( `" _
Time and again,  P9 \+ z4 m/ f# z3 v
Soaring with the eagle,( }" y: z* h/ J/ D% g  N8 X
Swimming in the sea,
' N# F: ~% }6 u0 Q$ X9 a; B: I; }Enjoying all of nature& Q* }2 ?$ R: p! j4 |1 T: B. ?
While I'm waiting for thee.
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