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In the garden of my heart

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发表于 2006-6-25 01:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!' G/ c/ H4 |* ]) L7 f; ^% D
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In the garden of my heart
3 V0 {/ j9 E) ?( FYou planted a tree9 i+ V4 _* d( k, {* g/ Q/ }
From sunset til dawn
! _4 n" n3 d% {3 |, b' fThrough darkness to light
* \/ y7 [5 K" _, }, H4 [Nourished with my soul
5 i) T3 A1 a9 p* X, `9 L! \  a6 SDevoured my sorrow by thee. K% q/ }- l0 P2 F. h5 b2 o
6 l4 s4 o: `3 e, L% k7 h  S0 p
In the memory of my life
' H9 K- D9 d' y. w, n# C( DYou planted a dream6 c; V9 m* \: [
Should the sky fall down on me
) E" @% ~2 F. J* y3 w! gMay promises fade in the sea
( o! l# Y- L$ o$ L/ U$ h0 Q9 MSewing back every broken pieces$ t2 G* [! I4 m4 s0 g
Bursting the love out of me; X3 j% y* v! \

& b3 z' R; |( q9 y- a[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:08 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
+ m1 D% N3 H: i. ~/ B. @6 k听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!3 s: P+ E. l2 R# W) i3 \% @7 T2 P
6 d6 k8 Y4 Q0 |1 L) r
In the garden of my heart% d5 z6 P1 w7 t( v& T( m- z
You planted a tree
% i) L3 U+ o" e, a+ o* jFrom sunset til dawn2 L* z4 k. @1 `, {! O
Through darkness to light0 o  n4 f' }8 a( _/ p
Nourished with my soul" C  J* Y- Y. a0 Z
Devoured my so ...

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眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?* X/ |; f* M2 z+ H
) L9 A! p% G+ M- ~
写得真好。
2 `2 v( K+ p! F, ]6 |0 K* P4 t% u9 w; d- c
加精加精!
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:20 | 显示全部楼层
哥们儿,你没喝多吧?没事就过来烧烟啊!
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
汗!居然有2单词不认识。:(
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发表于 2006-6-25 03:41 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
6 l3 c8 r& T; i6 r$ F眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?
; |7 q& Q8 }6 [0 o& u* W# e7 ~: _4 w写得真好。
2 x: B! h$ N* C1 g; Y5 `加精加精!

, y  S% H- \  Q* z( R我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗
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发表于 2006-6-25 05:31 | 显示全部楼层
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。
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发表于 2006-6-29 09:57 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表
; o0 t& [" C& e如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。
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五月JJ这个意境,想想实在是罗曼蒂克,不过在爱屯,海天相接是没有了,只有在湖畔雪山了:)
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发表于 2006-6-29 11:06 | 显示全部楼层
Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.3 ^: a* N* h  i" P6 S
. O5 M. B  G/ s+ @6 @7 R0 Q0 Q7 r
Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-6-29 18:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表
' `# D+ U" Z: W6 t/ @! YShould the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
- m& ?7 @% m/ L# ]7 k* o0 q7 `
- `, f* Y$ z. fSewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

6 Z- h) x$ m% N7 d7 s# }0 v+ T" f" U' ^! p/ W  t* o
Thanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.6 r" B, v" u5 l! s  V+ q8 K6 ?! U

3 K/ e. r$ C6 p; U1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".
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2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.
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发表于 2006-6-30 01:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民,但很喜气!很有乐在其中的意境啊!
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发表于 2006-7-2 10:50 | 显示全部楼层
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
* s; [! [  A/ k% k! a# k$ |4 Z0 x( F6 u6 Y# ]% K" }6 \; Z
Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
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发表于 2006-7-2 13:50 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表" X6 O8 V: t( a2 \# r( w6 @
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。2 V0 X' u1 q# ~7 O$ Y
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Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
% I" d5 M. F0 x- G# G, H

: L  t6 Z6 `1 h( T( S( n/ H1 a诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-7-2 13:56 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
( f$ z6 E( E% B0 ~. Tthee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
7 d# z+ b3 H* `8 z
( g' M- I+ U4 _* I3 z2 SShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
" e" w* B: d+ \6 d% `% T

! V5 a  t) e7 ]# |1 N* W有啊,有很多经典的例子。  v2 u2 [: ]( z0 s" t

& q* |' j5 I& w( x  b; G9 g6 B3 J比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》) A7 V' p! u6 O: F5 J6 v

7 V: Y& C0 ^/ b: @; QDon't weep at my grave( @/ R. o+ v8 F/ V3 \% z
For I am not there,
1 Y) k% t& p$ `0 @. SI've a date with a butterfly
5 H+ W" f6 [8 {' f& S& mTo dance on the air.
6 z/ Q" _+ ~0 p$ a8 q6 E9 aIf I'm missed, find a flower,! T0 L! Q/ l4 R  H( y
I'll be there too,
. D0 I+ M9 \( h! eSniffing it's fragrance% G6 R' P9 e. h% ?( s! `/ `1 d2 B
Right next to you.% ]( ~4 {6 u/ ~3 G( l4 H% L5 \
4 a) R$ b/ o- N1 T) D* T& J
Don't be sad
# V+ W& T, m' X0 `, aWhen you remember me,* E; j+ @8 A' O, W- ?/ F
For I'm singing in the sunshine,
: j0 K# N6 k  hWild and free,8 _$ o: H9 Z, o3 j+ o4 J/ z
Flirting with the lighting,: t& M0 ~9 k! E! x; `! {( Q
Playing tag with the wind,9 x/ e; ?( L+ ?, i' \
Chasing the thunder4 q# B! L, u( p( F  B* r
Time and again,, a( r1 \- v2 y, u( n
Soaring with the eagle,! Q9 s% j! r3 a3 [
Swimming in the sea,5 K" f* x1 M. ]' d- |
Enjoying all of nature
, n- x1 Y2 g7 r# y; t" s2 sWhile I'm waiting for thee.
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