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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
$ |* K# R9 b0 \( |6 Whour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
6 H3 C9 _+ T& n, mmorning.
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3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,. U$ l$ V/ m1 w+ D d+ [
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a8 d* m/ h! S4 e* S
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.7 T0 x% S8 I0 P6 @
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
1 x, N4 V7 j3 V) l+ j- P+ Hown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
6 D, o" @ r6 gmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires$ x5 O& T# ] ?2 m
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell
9 K, j* [% A8 r- }! m- W: c* Gphone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.; ^$ ]: a$ [% t( y
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5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,, P) y" S$ Y3 d, L( K
cussed out, and possibly shot.: F# v- y7 g3 }9 ~7 _; o# {
& V4 a1 [0 m9 A3 @4 n2 \! K) r% O6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can" j( T7 E( k3 b1 w9 e* U
get you shot.: s' e8 q: Y( F
- @! ?" s& M; t0 Y7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that
; i5 \, B2 F7 U- uhas turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at; r' ^( E. o+ F8 m) l& `
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot# O! q& h( Y5 M4 p7 j: z# J9 T
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first
! {5 |; m: { u$ Kvehicle through the intersection.' `2 f' i- t% f& A" X$ X
+ \+ j$ y$ x/ t0 e: F8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
v$ x( f: Q* d1 L! _$ Ubarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next, {4 W$ I7 f# I N
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and; }9 A4 N3 l5 w. ~6 K2 [
more construction starts everyday.
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
" t& G, q' I; v7 f1 l8 _. Ydeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
3 ~/ B. G% r7 o+ X) L1 i7 ksquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.% |/ J7 n+ q M+ @- b
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
9 Q4 d3 T5 p9 Z' e! i; Y' hroad. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye
4 \* I0 C4 e3 _/ K9 n1 E* M. z9 ^Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and ?. i) E6 @; z: M! e# P
66 Street are also the same road; got it?6 x/ u+ ^2 K+ M/ \
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the9 M% ]) Q9 K) _* M; x
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally$ U1 D7 A1 Y2 r) e7 E0 c
Activated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,. l8 y! r: \2 `" z' R; L2 _
you are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
F0 ?6 j" ?" ?: Yaccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.9 M7 S. Z6 B, p* A4 v, y) e
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur9 y- I% K) ?9 a1 s8 U
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and
" ?' y8 S6 Q! T, ~6 Nblankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
