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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush
, u# q: r0 a7 r0 d- K, [8 phour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday
+ O' ], A0 T0 X, @( V6 u6 imorning.
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" P% M# @# Y& n9 \' L3 M- d3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,
% I# A8 Z9 t; L3 l! q: Byou are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a
& L6 c9 F. s m2 ? P* ulanding at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.5 K8 U* A4 |1 i* r3 j7 a
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4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
& T( X& D( M' K$ ^& Nown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest
4 q5 T9 V) e9 {( `) g- I0 vmuffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires# X0 Z! _' H. d' n% N$ a5 G" R
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell3 k3 J" k) w' M" D8 e
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.4 ]6 R" x) u1 F; u3 Y
' D8 J& M, i' {1 D# @" c5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,- o0 H5 B U3 N4 B5 Q" S: N
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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0 {/ b. B9 d! Z& f) V- C6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can$ i$ }7 f1 w" R4 N1 K0 r
get you shot.! L4 j; ~' i$ t7 e( H q
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that% n& _( r( _. P3 r w) I
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at
" K$ K5 {, j+ a1 P: s p0 ]2 Tthe intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot
$ N- ^% z6 r6 h8 P# h9 Jyou as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first1 `9 ?/ W# m/ u8 W# o2 l& R
vehicle through the intersection., D6 [ R" X% ~8 `" _; y$ w; j
* A+ z8 {- g9 k, ~5 E! Q* c9 F8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour
5 ^. C a, b# K8 | b3 I" ~. g# Y& ubarrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next h8 S1 O H; j9 Q- z+ u
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and0 T' Z, P$ w# b# |" S
more construction starts everyday." e* a- a# u1 y R% C
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9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
H4 S% z- ~6 b2 Z! \8 p" @deer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,& z3 g) D! w& R2 W! N, u, Q1 s
squirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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* s" m1 {6 m* ^* O& l10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same
. h! ~9 q. ~$ N- c: @road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye3 A: ~6 ~, e% k$ | I6 `2 v8 |
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and! }% @3 p9 a, o
66 Street are also the same road; got it?
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* v, i" T$ F7 W Z11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the
* c0 n: S1 O$ cshoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
8 F& m- Z$ ^+ ?% ?4 }" {) k3 sActivated.'
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12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
+ y* j1 f9 i& }5 Z, D' ?% Nyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
0 r% @" A' R8 e5 j+ Haccordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.. n* B9 K$ ]! P2 v, n' ~- r
3 w- K1 D/ ^7 h$ W13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur; `* p: K7 K8 c
lined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and- \8 l* E# X$ o9 K3 s$ O
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
