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it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol8 F7 r& V; w) `. A- I, N M3 k. S$ o
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Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:! X d6 O! G+ {& ^2 X3 Y
& j4 d' {8 M+ a) s1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking.' N X& ]" p6 ?' M+ V" ~6 c
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2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. d9 X5 b6 U2 b& B/ [: v: w
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3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms., J8 I5 o" E; {/ l4 z
! @, _8 u0 j K4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.
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; ~6 ]' L" D" S1 x; ~" J. ]5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
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) A+ p0 ]) \/ N* o6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area
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7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.4 e( n$ q' a* Y& p' U! S
5 `$ I" U. g8 k5 a( z0 A+ d8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask9 G& g: {- Q1 k( x" l4 B& N5 ]: c
'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'9 u* p( ~& y5 t
9 w M% P+ D; t6 D1 N9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.2 _8 A9 i! p2 h, w7 u& J" X
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10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.4 p4 r+ E% Q3 y
( G3 E# ^ `" \! l* N! ]) z11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme. k3 \; z5 [( k0 d6 O; y
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12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.. i7 ]9 t" N/ Z! n) S
O0 R9 n* W$ o) |+ A13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!
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14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
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And; last, but not least!); I8 D1 u6 Z: c! N; K" p$ B
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
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发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
