 鲜花( 310)  鸡蛋( 0)
|
it's hilarious, but i didn't write it lol9 i9 k/ ?$ r6 g7 O4 N, Z
, Q# P: l! H: Y4 P9 X4 e4 t" X0 d. O4 t0 n$ V
( Z. ~2 C# i1 T5 P) X1 Z
Things to do at Wal-Mart while your spouse/partner/parents is/are taking their sweet time:
7 l% [) ~3 `, l( Z* Y" Q8 R# x% J0 Y g) s ^; ^: R, P
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in peoples' carts when they aren't looking./ b( k5 x7 ]9 M' G6 {
4 @5 L6 i0 ~' m; O, \$ }
: X! N$ w7 a6 [# S3 D2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
" H5 E' g4 [4 s' D' Y2 ~" P
. G6 N8 _& s* v3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.
7 ~* L' k+ g0 ?3 N& i9 k( l9 w5 u. @& S7 g" I" }% U9 A
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in housewares and see what happens.7 _! W! N% s9 `+ f& l0 ?& f
! l' g; w. p% l* C3 e0 w }$ o5 t
5. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M's on lay away.
4 z8 Y! e+ K3 X2 ]: Y% V
, w( o9 ?* F; T9 B! T
& K- ~$ s# j$ u' [, P3 |' V6. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area, r- q$ i1 m! V- G3 W" H2 U: Q- Q
! a3 v8 B6 C$ p+ a' @9 T0 U9 J9 `! i
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring in pillows from the bedding department.
+ o( r' A I4 G; r8 B
0 x e2 z) a1 g8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask
L. C( q1 t( B3 V5 K H; G: Q'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'7 @3 f1 B& Q6 Y u
: i) B1 c1 [9 [: R. _6 E( p
9. Look right into the security camera; use it as a mirror, & and pick your nose.
9 H3 ]+ t/ F5 t) ^8 K' B$ C# }3 I% j( K/ Z( T; J
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti- depressants are.) L# n. P" @6 \* h0 t+ k/ q# x9 f
6 M% S9 b* k [: g/ E) Q& Z. i7 B
11. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the Mission Impossible theme.
% z9 u$ e( k: [+ J% ^ U; X
w' d/ g# O/ Q+ B4 I# s# t12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different size funnels.9 B# c0 A5 @4 }. c
) v |+ T! C' p13. Hide in a clothing rack; when people browse through, say PICK ME!* @3 `" M$ o! ]5 l/ P( K/ j
' _: s3 Y9 A/ t) T6 K; c9 J p! g
14. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!
1 z9 V# S' S0 a9 ^9 a1 a7 O
5 m0 L0 J! s; {And; last, but not least!), L9 g. v( ~$ ^9 h
15. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while; and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!" |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-12-20 23:57
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2009-3-2 12:30
