English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
  @2 P; S1 t& h. R0 vEnglish is a stupid language.
, ]9 {/ G7 F6 X/ \" X; y3 E$ \There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
6 M2 P- F7 `% K/ \; EEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
' G5 Q$ @4 I( rBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
5 M" O; U; m# H2 s/ v4 T9 AAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

1 Q1 v# a: R! JIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
( _5 m# r0 E2 q! O. u& f+ YIf the teacher taught,
0 [4 D& X, a6 Y' M0 D' V3 z- S5 EWhy didn't the preacher praught.
/ {# X9 e& Z5 Q& F( ]+ {% v1 S
; v$ A5 L3 f* K  v; xIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
& c& C# t, b8 W' j; iWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
. M3 ]) B+ D2 `* ^( r! MYet play at a recital?
! V; ]5 ^* X  v/ D4 qPark on driveways and
  D  @3 U8 x2 `3 ~9 r) Z% B3 {Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
4 x0 n- _2 g3 b5 L  n# r+ m, _Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
9 K9 m% X% u) X5 PAnd in which you fill in a form
3 k! ~$ S- w4 ~By filling it out
1 n6 l0 H! t  X; c$ {0 QAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
' n  G9 |9 H% R$ [4 ^And it reflects the creativity of the human race
8 x3 P# ~6 j% w(Which of course isn't a race at all)
: D+ Q7 t/ |. Z9 P2 n3 ?2 w- v
That is why
6 ^; M  k4 ?& F% _* [. FWhen the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
" C+ W7 G" U1 Z3 D# ^9 L" I" G- w  c4 QAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
8 r0 G! t  }- r0 f% F1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
1 d1 R8 w1 C& E$ Y7 \. O2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
# j* }* n4 ^" u/ w# ^2 F3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4 o& S- t3 U. @  Q* s8 e4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
( w$ J$ H, j# C( a/ F其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
% p  L0 `! _0 V0 k我看了几行,就看不下去了.
3 {3 b& W' e2 e3 @! a% Z# J1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
) z' r& w! D$ K* f+ x9 ^! }2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
4 t1 y0 j4 F8 T7 P8 L0 a. E实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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