English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

* U1 l( `9 t' S1 NLet's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
) l6 j- v* P* X% P( f7 @4 dNo ham in the hamburger
: Z: f, l) a0 [$ HAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
$ z  m% S/ W+ eEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
) L1 p' i+ m9 k( \" p
' \$ z1 W! A& g0 Q  l3 KWe sometimes take English for granted
2 M  L, J' a; _5 }; `0 c. L- SBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
# ?. g2 X" f  xQuicksand takes you down slowly
9 d& t. m2 D# V! U, oBoxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
1 q; e$ K( i9 [  U" `( b+ m' a
- J0 U. f. K# }( j' OIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
9 n' [( D1 J) E! AIf the plural of tooth is teeth
$ ^" {8 T& u1 f8 Z# ], n: X) q- zShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

# n% I, J4 I, ~# m0 V' RIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
3 C& g- ^/ ]' M& s* {7 q) u' NYet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
; \) q( \) j) Z' ?6 [, ]
! H# S# F. I' x/ E4 B3 BYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
# r: M, z! U. t4 \- L5 e% FIt burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
9 c6 Y5 b* ]0 y  A; e6 w5 \And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
1 j, `5 U; l# DAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
) @. I, H6 L) ~9 {3 @3 }0 hIt starts
But when I wind up this observation,
3 _5 y& j6 x4 }8 GIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
, ]  H: q7 U% ]! a9 u1 B( i2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
/ Q) ?2 t/ _- G0 a3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
$ j7 W0 s, F: g, @3 V* i4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
+ g, Q; }  x, X0 M: Y+ c5 Y我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
" I7 q1 L( S, w2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

- m/ a# A7 B) e4 b, Y谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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