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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
: G" k/ K; h9 z" B" AEnglish is a stupid language.
/ N, L. ]& e! I- Y. c! l+ f, SThere is no egg in the eggplant
) \- C* }6 _! gNo ham in the hamburger6 H9 |* N8 m; W! D
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.' |: }- z1 e" o, t- V6 U2 }8 Q
English muffins were not invented in England! ~, x8 B0 S3 X$ \
French fries were not invented in France.
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: F; V( w6 ^! T; q* |$ aWe sometimes take English for granted) \& U* G; J' U3 b% p- L: N
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that, k& d/ ]! _: `
Quicksand takes you down slowly, |" \& I, C4 C( I) Z) w
Boxing rings are square
: d9 D5 M( {6 D% i' [$ MAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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* x) Z x4 O2 zIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.- b0 a# X5 ]7 v& E _* ]# p
If the plural of tooth is teeth
8 O4 i8 l6 j/ VShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
) P9 p. a" X4 X7 u: H" PIf the teacher taught,# U! L7 T4 i+ R- P- n8 X
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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: k3 t; X* @- P1 Z2 S# O3 S+ {If a vegetarian eats vegetables
/ h1 S! v8 z$ j8 pWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
% z2 [2 h8 `8 s( Y& ~3 RWhy do people recite at a play# I- s. ^) d# n7 H' w) m7 g
Yet play at a recital?1 _- a4 o; e$ K" _8 B! B
Park on driveways and- M; }* o* x$ ]6 v6 E+ Z
Drive on parkways, C- F; P! n9 Q7 L5 t3 q) o
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
, c* T( H& j8 W, }Of a language where a house can burn up as0 K# }$ h/ s! |" H1 d
It burns down+ g; I9 `2 p- G k$ Z
And in which you fill in a form g" B: [1 {5 v% b
By filling it out
P8 g; H- `6 Y9 M9 DAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers6 m6 c# Y! q: u0 m9 i- c. o
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
$ g0 V# { ^4 S, j5 e(Which of course isn't a race at all)% _2 w( k- O: Y7 z" R
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That is why
* b4 ]9 F1 z/ m. u$ T. X# _; G& Q2 LWhen the stars are out they are visible
2 v$ d/ f; Y, v2 e# }( wBut when the lights are out they are invisible
$ V9 g. t$ w- y- f& X; y/ u2 t7 JAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
+ M% r( b3 ], P/ ZIt starts4 Y& Y0 q1 |* S6 v* I
But when I wind up this observation,( K I! ?; N# J2 V! U
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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