鲜花( 1394) 鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.: H* F% ]4 o/ u5 @
9 I, W7 n1 ~& ^; \1 F0 rWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 5 I7 |2 ^3 J. F0 o- W; x
6 u; k5 I9 p1 Q2 D% D) M. W xIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.8 H5 z3 g5 D9 u8 P) C
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
, e3 r. U, n9 }) h `make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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. u/ q& w! t$ i* `& H+ QGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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& y$ H" B" _0 K2 lWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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/ J6 j. w+ r# A& gCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..& X) n+ q8 Q' g3 T- L$ G
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. 7 s6 f1 R& k9 m. @/ c; H+ q. y
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. 3 C7 \8 C& ?2 ?
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Rinse conditioner off hair.8 _) g- Z# G0 C9 F" R, O
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Shave armpits and legs.1 s7 u `' Z: |# L+ k6 W) t
+ N, u1 }6 [+ v2 J8 B; TTurn off shower.
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( s, Z8 m/ }# M g2 W5 G; k) tSqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.) a1 U8 J: b0 g$ Y5 A
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 3 q' p0 E) x5 m$ G" w4 ~4 S7 a
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. $ y$ {- i) S' p* @# @5 g1 t
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. % Z6 o- D: }1 v
- i0 o0 X. i$ d% k- S) IIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. 9 b3 o* u, ?" b" d z+ V4 a7 t* Z
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5 D j" A& N) i9 g& B+ bHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 4 ?* ?7 ^5 ~2 m
' o- B2 F1 g! S8 \; K5 u" lTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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+ c& {1 Z7 X& N2 _# d6 ZWalk naked to the bathroom.
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. 5 `% e: o+ k/ \- C% e. x- \
& r' D; J" C `$ A H# t4 lLook at your manly physique in the mirror.
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& ]/ l9 @- r/ U e0 Z& rAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. # G6 _, z; M+ F3 ~
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. . e4 [! w/ ~& b1 z2 s
" l7 w- g6 @% XBlow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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5 k) w" n! q: ^Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. " \" o* X3 x7 y' R* i
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. . H2 K( ?# R/ }3 q4 R
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. ' x5 C: O) X! s; k( w
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off." j- q. p% p, V: |" x
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. ( Q+ P& D: ~! d! N! G5 a# j
. Y8 S# x# i/ N' t! u1 ^Admire wiener size in mirror again. 2 G2 P' V, {* |; u1 A+ a
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 2 C; e) q, ^. I% {" R" y9 u- S& _
1 X) i3 k7 T& b! j* f& oReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. G0 }8 }+ \% [# `9 M
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Throw wet towel on bed. 7 d2 ~; o H! k6 A5 ~0 q, D& U
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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