 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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$ T! Q1 M' D PTake off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.5 y, M1 g' }# T! t* G9 q
& R0 b( y. c8 Y# S( W2 L8 j; w* FWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. 3 |8 K0 r) d5 ]- @) k2 {* w
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- 5 I( Q+ I4 i { R4 } u
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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' K' _* U# w& B( t+ ~! F$ qGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. ! x/ [8 _4 i4 c' u" B7 P
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.$ Y* E m* _/ v+ o- u- w/ u
: z. W8 ]2 S5 R& ~0 I& FCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced... C0 p# e4 R' r5 \
- C1 Y" u& t/ X0 j% A/ Y& kWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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! r2 R i% P/ pWash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. " f* J) G/ l) F- |
5 u. F6 o1 g9 \/ B$ c9 L- ARinse conditioner off hair.
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$ ?. i0 g2 Z1 P( Z$ }/ H1 G+ iShave armpits and legs.
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. k' x! g# e3 I0 l" NTurn off shower.4 S/ ]$ U' R9 l F( l" G2 X) E* @
" K3 P# I$ d$ F. I; U3 E9 USqueegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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" d3 {/ H6 x. @/ d G9 p+ USpray mold spots with Tilex.
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7 c) N' _* q; ?4 V1 B- VGet out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. 3 n, A# [) `9 T
. \) n- A5 e: J, J" M2 V) q! bWrap hair in super absorbent towel. ) L+ E7 D4 _% w% U
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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3 V1 M- x" y3 C7 q; { N" D; GIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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' @& d8 O E/ S- w$ XHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 8 d* r) |& L7 q- K4 {
* M* F+ i2 r) }8 [9 f6 z4 e5 pTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
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Walk naked to the bathroom.* j; D: W6 u6 X) [
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If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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) z% W! b! V$ rAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. ' T% B2 f2 t+ S! p
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Y7 a* h# M/ Z! J6 y, Z
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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# I7 d6 s! l' j( }- rSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. ( n2 T8 H3 R, s2 O+ c9 Q* v/ J
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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y1 [8 E4 e+ Y3 XWash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. " _3 q) F% N/ F/ {' ~7 i7 _# i
; o$ e8 y" l8 oPee. 3 M8 H# f! \ @8 o7 A# \8 m
' t- G5 T" S0 s$ z* G& e" ~* H9 KRinse off and get out of shower. $ X/ C/ m: h3 y d' n
/ y; A+ J8 @) j" \8 F7 YPartially dry off., ?. ^& _% E% o, O. u
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Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. 2 l6 v3 D0 N2 D
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Admire wiener size in mirror again. " ]& V2 t+ I3 S2 b2 N
7 }& o( r7 s- [+ z. \: ?Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 1 Z6 V% Z; k1 w8 l% T
. B( j; Y H& S5 C3 Y1 O+ fReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. 4 A' ?7 t' j5 l4 v! V' U1 E9 u' C
% c" H/ F9 ]0 {5 y$ d. Q* [Throw wet towel on bed. 2 o6 y. L L7 r8 {1 w8 c
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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