 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
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# T* H0 s- Z8 \ C: e9 U- sWalk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. ! d4 W+ E' P) r. P
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.* c- O `2 \: {- Q
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Look at your womanly physique in the mirror -- / h8 T7 I: i" P7 S0 v, u
make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
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Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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$ a! X: [: `, [) e6 p) pWash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. 7 c5 H& H* t1 H. J V3 F
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Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced... T$ Y# A5 d9 O: H
6 s N. u1 o* Y: X+ [; gWash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. ' U/ m3 w7 F6 @
3 d4 N. \" C- ARinse conditioner off hair.5 v) n* z/ X% G$ x
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Shave armpits and legs.
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.$ T$ |2 n2 n- R5 q. Z) x0 }) [
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Spray mold spots with Tilex. 9 M$ _8 c9 G l! N y
6 C0 P4 v2 N5 G' r- `: |Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
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Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.
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- q. X2 i. R6 bIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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) p* g2 R" B+ H8 y- M. y0 {+ dHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
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: \) r2 T5 a t+ tTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. 2 u) s4 [+ h8 Q5 \7 B9 @2 u
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Walk naked to the bathroom." N% z4 v1 I2 i' x5 R. ~
- ]# D1 |# W3 z& y! P3 `4 S0 cIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. / B$ {, k- ]/ x$ K- g
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror. , i: P6 e& u5 S' L
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Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt. 0 R) Q9 z' }: N5 y
8 h1 y# E7 }5 l+ SGet in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits.
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+ n- j9 [, {) ~+ [Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. ! f0 R0 I3 Q8 e3 y
$ B9 O5 J c$ QFart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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) L3 f# l- X7 Z# e$ y DSpend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. 8 `3 X4 J8 ~' S$ K5 \% ]
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. ( [ @) S0 e* G" d0 B( }, F
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Pee.
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.8 {% b) A+ y/ V; u& b0 k7 D1 V
! p+ M: j9 `! ` D* Z3 n0 d& I* T9 IFail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. & j6 ?' m3 M$ u9 H( Y2 L
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
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Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. ( M( ^! J$ y8 T3 u; F, b
. W/ \1 t( S* _8 n: o$ q8 MThrow wet towel on bed. ' d4 k: K" X. e4 ` q0 y
$ k) d; K' ?0 I. I$ r/ DIf there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-2-21 08:02
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发表于 2008-2-21 09:03
