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5 _' K7 M# _/ HWhy did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.4 P' e# Q9 [9 ]
2. Mostly to clean the house.
& ?; E, V: d h* q4 A1 s3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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How did God make mothers? 1 x; K# O: c b z+ A& ]8 g6 {. d S
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us./ \: ~% g+ l! _" Z1 u: d
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 4 H* Z" L! \& x* s( _$ v) k. U& t
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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What ingredients are mothers made of ? % i% z: h/ F* U8 h
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. # l3 Z ]( k0 T. l9 v: J
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. - u; w1 ]2 W; n* o6 p8 V" H
. z* Y0 i" [' EWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
3 V- Y5 h) o5 Z" h( t, d0 f1. We're related.' N6 M5 @/ k; @& A4 y& g8 X+ Z( V
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. 5 N' X8 s3 v) {5 B
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
3 j+ ^( A, d5 g h z' ^1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 4 f8 g* d' T, o
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
; e0 ^' d$ h' ?- I+ R3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
* J* X) v8 q& W/ I; |. o* n1. His last name.1 p4 Q- v1 B0 X6 Z
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer? }2 y V+ O6 }) s$ k- Y
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? $ V( @/ x) X: a d9 R; k
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Why did your mom marry your dad?
. l2 e/ p2 {( B" i- s1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
% N; K9 @- @0 k3 a9 b2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
2 E6 [6 ^$ c: N# p1 }8 E- ^3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. / M# u. q: i) v4 k# I2 M* n
/ C& A3 [1 i4 s! u" W2 R* Q( J+ I9 RWho's the boss at your house? " e: U9 ?0 v- t& E) c
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. # u' V7 H7 Y7 C7 d
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.7 f9 O) J9 C3 C& ~4 m
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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! j$ \( K. T) z6 A9 q1 pWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
% [7 c5 W+ O7 [1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
+ P7 g. |! H- w: d* q- _2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.% e0 y6 E4 {- k. T1 b( x
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. # x- q1 ]2 j: c9 I
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. # T% D$ {1 L r" W8 E
9 B7 h; \$ I2 DWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
. o+ Q# \8 o( c2 a1. Mothers don't do spare time.- T9 W3 x% o% J% w) X
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. ) } r! B. B3 Q/ w5 i& J& W5 d
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
; Y+ @7 F, `1 i& C8 w- g5 \1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.6 N% u: v7 i, P1 S3 [
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 2 \$ i, p; v4 t% i, Z3 V
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? 1 K8 V$ A) p. `: C! e
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
( q$ Q$ k" D( J+ i$ ~/ e2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.4 f3 s$ k6 U% d+ u
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. / W, G- I8 L/ M5 R8 y2 m; C
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