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In the garden of my heart

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发表于 2006-6-25 01:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!
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In the garden of my heart
. T' A. a' n' S6 K3 O' k9 F! z( o5 vYou planted a tree+ `( ^7 L: c! B# M
From sunset til dawn
) N9 r6 f$ y" @9 m5 LThrough darkness to light) d5 \; A" F& N' M
Nourished with my soul/ M& i0 ^  Q& c6 ~
Devoured my sorrow by thee" d( U  `$ t0 Z0 K3 |2 z

4 c2 ?% T6 E5 r/ L/ W: iIn the memory of my life
; T/ y, M* b( `/ HYou planted a dream
  j' |6 Y7 w! n9 P6 fShould the sky fall down on me
6 y8 q& N: A- u" X! j8 v' `3 ?8 KMay promises fade in the sea+ f- t# a. v1 g( c3 t7 z7 l4 g
Sewing back every broken pieces
# W5 H( f- E4 sBursting the love out of me
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3 ^" E  `, a; G! [[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:08 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
/ b) {2 x/ o  P听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!
$ O/ x: J6 u1 s0 x2 ^! T! C! x5 P5 S5 f6 i! r+ M" k
In the garden of my heart
. R6 h4 v; _; q5 h, d. i9 r( KYou planted a tree) W) b: g% T6 H/ i  g
From sunset til dawn
5 K( U( h' a- ]8 f/ b: h- WThrough darkness to light
- `3 J& ?+ L: ~$ m1 S4 _$ iNourished with my soul* l! w7 S" ~. O7 e7 c* Z  n4 n
Devoured my so ...

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/ n3 i& ]1 O) \, C9 ^眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?0 W3 W9 I8 t9 V* @; N

" B( _9 _, l4 G写得真好。5 @0 q9 \* q$ R6 l
% v2 I/ ?6 V8 B1 z7 D
加精加精!
大型搬家
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:20 | 显示全部楼层
哥们儿,你没喝多吧?没事就过来烧烟啊!
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
汗!居然有2单词不认识。:(
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发表于 2006-6-25 03:41 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
7 O6 Q& a  q- f1 v5 C眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?) }2 R' }) m3 `4 L: U
写得真好。7 S2 R1 k) v) C5 o6 B
加精加精!

4 Y, r* i1 P3 q# n' L" ^; n我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗
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发表于 2006-6-25 05:31 | 显示全部楼层
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。
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发表于 2006-6-29 09:57 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表2 O+ g( ?/ Z& v  v8 T# o
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

0 p- E! Q! m9 c. k- t五月JJ这个意境,想想实在是罗曼蒂克,不过在爱屯,海天相接是没有了,只有在湖畔雪山了:)
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发表于 2006-6-29 11:06 | 显示全部楼层
Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
1 s5 Q, U3 L% `7 |$ q7 V' e! `( L  r7 I. A
Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-6-29 18:23 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表
) Z: j3 M7 `5 @Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.2 b& B" |7 Y  z; Z. Z
5 Z& r. Q. z9 u/ _6 Q. I* z
Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

' g& C5 Y5 t% f! Z  x# t. U' s; E  Y5 ~, [
Thanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.
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1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".
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2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.
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发表于 2006-6-30 01:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民,但很喜气!很有乐在其中的意境啊!
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发表于 2006-7-2 10:50 | 显示全部楼层
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。* e: `3 f8 x6 v/ ^

* x' `9 I8 |1 L/ ?8 L9 DShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2006-7-2 13:50 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表& g3 I" F. @7 w# B, W
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
( K5 d2 X% X+ T4 g" {
( G, X, v9 ^2 x8 d0 B! lShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

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诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-7-2 13:56 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
& `8 P6 c5 D4 Sthee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。4 `& N( m# s' A3 R4 Y- c( g& @  f

. k7 Z0 r7 \3 S  e. n, ]Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

5 X6 \1 X5 r9 V8 X
/ q- \- u  b/ S) E5 y; _. E有啊,有很多经典的例子。' e& }$ g) t2 n" X1 u9 s

% j* W/ y# K! `# G比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》" j8 [# E7 U: {2 q& J' @  D' s/ v
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Don't weep at my grave  J$ B& ]* R# f8 R7 U$ X; Y
For I am not there,
( y( c$ [$ i9 W+ \% lI've a date with a butterfly
: G0 X3 P' _& QTo dance on the air.
  Z( R0 j8 A' W; o  R& VIf I'm missed, find a flower,
( X8 n7 K( H# g* y6 vI'll be there too,, K0 z, e( F- U6 Y" @
Sniffing it's fragrance$ n, B+ f/ v/ g- m( m8 D+ i4 a
Right next to you.- G; p- F( ~9 B
: J! f! Z( o" w1 [) v, P4 ^8 S
Don't be sad
3 A) \# z0 v9 [6 q- [+ u% R$ MWhen you remember me,4 f6 H1 U- w7 |8 Z
For I'm singing in the sunshine,4 f& _1 D. A2 V) g
Wild and free,+ Y! i: g' t4 Y/ F. v2 O: C' }
Flirting with the lighting,4 |* Y6 _' s8 ~
Playing tag with the wind,
& [3 i; w: ]0 u" i+ r* `: uChasing the thunder( t) F5 ]  O: _9 e
Time and again,
/ K/ X$ r  c8 H) u- HSoaring with the eagle,
) {( q' e8 V$ I2 O* ^Swimming in the sea,2 R" c, ?* c# q: T) j" m, M, Q
Enjoying all of nature
* S1 Z4 ]# G9 k5 y0 k) g3 k% sWhile I'm waiting for thee.
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