 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
/ x( O7 t7 d8 w. f5 M4 \请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
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, n' H8 o v- A* b4 r0 Q7 w/ k+ i1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.3 i( V3 {8 B2 C c2 |; G
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫" A$ I! d% K" K) q* P" E0 f
) q* G7 o: A, G1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
: u, x6 |. w' H/ T2 b5 J! sdown.
- k4 E$ R1 t1 ]% yWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
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leaving it down.
; V; q) B: }! @6 V0 Z) \1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？; u* j; }) B1 K: Q( Y3 j1 t$ K4 N8 [
& J p. k; H' |# b/ y5 u5 D* d1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.; @8 @8 ^ H, `
Let it be.- }* `; b% F n- [$ z' B% a
1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去: {5 U2 `! F+ E ?1 H }0 M5 Z$ i) J
0 z, ?0 }. f) q8 G B1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
% ]1 J' [2 n" [9 I2 i; S9 hthat way.
9 T4 R6 t+ m7 G, n1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.5 Y* A' j9 K4 i+ A
1，哭泣是敲诈
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% D. B" n2 I/ p0 }1. Ask for what you want.! o" M, P( _0 _- Q
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
# U5 w5 L4 ]# N+ b8 ^: h" HStrong hints do not work!/ i6 i! [! u M* t! f3 T
Obvious hints do not work!
8 l! M4 x: }4 U) S0 `% `Just say it!
* `; Z o9 q! h9 E- q8 Y1，你想要什么就说
. x2 [% B' ]$ X' x: c0 N" h5 N* S我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！+ F! |1 x9 S7 g: [% B
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1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every & W. Z0 ?$ x; R% X# N0 P
question.! O. W0 a( N W2 [* h6 ?3 q
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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4 L% |- {' x% x9 j4 g; m2 j/ B1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's
1 P1 a; c: t3 f. Z1 z3 }8 k7 t8 ], Y5 m2 Awhat we do.
$ ^$ ?0 T% ]7 f, T, fSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.1 a3 z: ^" x3 s4 m+ M
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
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0 d1 l. {3 ]: e- M1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.$ U7 u7 e" A7 G, L2 w
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
! c, K# |8 s3 b3 ^0 z$ ~In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
" Y/ Z; V# o: `0 h我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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% E9 b ?. J) H5 |8 t" D1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
" }, Q6 k# F/ Yto act like soap opera guys.; o8 `/ Y7 S2 _& L+ x O5 o
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们# y7 b5 h9 o' ^" s2 {6 F+ d' G" ^
* x8 W7 u- i4 a ^, r9 u' [1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.$ u: ^4 G" W0 X+ {9 b" m
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们* A7 A) O$ }+ F+ [. H5 {; Q' h
8 k) w; j$ y5 r; n! E+ E6 G1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways$ F5 {! U. v- S) v: r/ q7 h1 w
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.! N7 ~4 N, F8 E
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
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7 b' _$ |9 C+ r（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
" f0 D, g# T; C2 s9 h1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
: Y# D7 ~/ u% u% K5 B5 F6 edone. Not both.
4 z, I! P% d F- _If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
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2 b" w& y: m h' j1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
% b1 @, g0 [5 A' ^! \* R6 u3 z7 ocommercials.
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.2 ?3 t& p$ x' a4 B7 l) W8 e
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.4 G# ]# D0 t8 ^( J$ V& q: s1 d7 x
We have no idea what mauve is.$ ~& K8 Y! y4 e7 b: Z {
0 W" `( r2 G% _1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.% ?, H) _1 H7 T. y
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
! H8 z: m: i( V8 G2 A9 [: P1 ]$ l: onothing's wrong.' U1 N: J' L0 R/ d% u
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle./ a- J* U/ E6 ]; P) v8 q
) G3 T) ^ n/ i/ E$ r1 X1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer" M1 ]8 `% @5 v: s4 N ^( E
you don't want to hear.& S2 j' G% ^& t4 _9 \
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is2 h. A4 a" X" w% R, { {, ?, d0 v
fine...Really., N/ n; P5 q$ l* n
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
) A/ D" ^9 Y5 u% X, r! L# \discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.' B7 \3 s J9 A2 f6 [! q) d1 j2 z
) A- s, d4 b! h) [5 E/ P1 S1. You have enough clothes.; K+ \* y! k: Z7 A4 [
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1. You have too many shoes.
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# O% I) w6 k p6 n/ I" N1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!9 K/ K9 s3 g% ? f" a. u: U
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1. Thank you for reading this.
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5 U# s$ x& M! C' Q+ u4 ^Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;! I. y2 D: \) d" Y
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
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) y' B& V* S% ]4 S- v& d4 zPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
- ?# z6 r$ y4 |* X/ y; r( }$ N& mPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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