 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
|
Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!0 f$ A8 C8 B% @
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写
1 m7 `1 D4 G+ Q( Q4 Z
# y$ b2 w) m# @4 q% `" O* I! V1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
) {( _9 R( i- Q1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
4 |& }! [ C& z4 h8 b( Y7 ?' w4 T
1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it" N6 u+ y; T7 f3 K! U
down.# I& O+ y' n0 n/ Z- {
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about
7 q9 D" B; x1 ~% @0 r) A O. O pyou
9 F/ |# g2 t4 K6 c5 }# |" {( tleaving it down.7 V) c+ ^5 N/ ]4 O, O& _/ y# L
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
4 p) t! ]; c7 k/ h6 Q! G6 o7 a4 i, Z
1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
+ q, P, ~' J+ z/ j% [* z$ l8 @Let it be.
: B, ^4 a y: c0 a1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去/ b0 k' d& a# W0 z
( t7 E: M+ @0 N3 a% P: W1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it, M5 o# v. Z! z6 F6 V
that way.
) U. ]6 r& k! {, T* y* G) _6 J2 C! i% }1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！& R0 K' J5 z) u$ G- i
( X7 J% n- h# m* W5 s# s
1. Crying is blackmail.5 l- P! J% S& U- t6 M9 p
1，哭泣是敲诈
7 p4 n" E, { b) H9 f2 d
* o% D9 o) F+ W( ?1. Ask for what you want.9 d$ X. S' ^& A- {2 I! V* A) F
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!
- p" s2 I7 F, gStrong hints do not work!5 F( u: }; J, s5 U6 b
Obvious hints do not work!
( a) u7 v3 q. j5 BJust say it!6 B+ a* C# a- ?6 `4 T
1，你想要什么就说
$ D F1 O6 _; P; L; }; L( b X我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
) I; a" @* I6 c5 v0 D% O3 p
8 T+ a8 e/ c* W1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
8 ?+ L4 Z6 ^4 _; A# L9 b' }& d, }! Hquestion.
- T) M1 I* O; y& u1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
$ Q% w, F+ f8 H1 s! s/ G7 M) i2 y+ s( \
1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's0 ^: i/ p1 Q3 V [
what we do.
# U7 R x+ n9 T; q6 \7 Q' QSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
5 J1 u8 X2 d3 ]6 j9 E4 g" k6 _1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。
8 n, w" I+ e$ B* O7 i p' p" h% L" m
1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.) q; ^6 I% W' K( k, c* Z
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去9 `1 z. I, | }3 J6 r& v ~ X
1 g+ {4 x5 Y/ t4 z1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
9 }) Q/ |- G! F! @4 S$ Y0 A, qIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
7 t! \" O: n. h! c* h) g) \, a5 p% J: A我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
2 k( P; y& n3 m
9 J. m. _& q' S( h* j. w' X4 H1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us
1 Z7 L9 T/ T- G, h$ o: I3 k# M( _to act like soap opera guys.
8 ]5 U* _, l; z K( \1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们
0 E9 z9 _. Y/ q% m m( E9 U% U! [1 ~2 H/ X5 v2 T$ ^* b1 u# Y: q
1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.- l# j5 T9 Y. U
1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们8 Z3 \/ r5 D) M" ]3 z* M7 ]1 c
# b9 N8 J" R/ i& D9 m1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways- l& A7 W0 B, C& H+ }8 H& _
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
; X. W; D! j# A! N/ l7 v1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。
0 H6 O. A' _7 N8 b# M& D) a' s( f+ l
（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）
( K6 j% x6 y: J' u7 G1 }, ^1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it/ v# U. m$ Z+ k
done. Not both.$ ]& B2 Q" A0 r# b8 I
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.
2 S$ x/ R3 T7 Q' E
, o# D/ j( L7 R& H1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during- V6 {" m4 d/ Y F7 p! \
commercials.: B2 N" `1 a5 F3 L; c
- t0 f" R2 p; ^ ?+ {) L0 o1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
3 V! h6 J+ @' `) M! g8 F2 p; N* A
& P1 S. W+ V; \1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
. x8 x* b5 G% X: \. uPeach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.4 V! U3 S/ E- v1 m$ I3 ^) G! w3 r" z
We have no idea what mauve is.
' D' f' J8 f: j& q( R
( ~7 u4 V2 I6 {1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.0 J. Q) L$ V- y# {' x4 f
! B! J6 L9 O( B
1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
6 `- L( H" y( F" q# l6 fnothing's wrong.
9 ^/ [7 J% g$ LWe know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
3 p- L1 G' K) F K' ~' r1 g" x7 u; ?7 u5 ]( z: ?
1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer
' o3 X1 {1 U" }: p2 `2 M; ]you don't want to hear.
" J3 L$ h3 r$ u: k: c x U
0 K' T2 m$ l& e* Z1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is" K9 G/ P) y' N9 Q# w6 F
fine...Really.+ B8 ~8 \4 L4 R$ f7 }
1 O! A5 k, g. X) A8 G
1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to' `( X$ J( x: @- e4 D- E/ v3 J
discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
/ A/ `: z8 C' X/ L8 B; d+ q* X6 Y& j3 _) a; l5 ]
1. You have enough clothes.
6 \5 |1 J/ u0 `2 T0 W' y V, Y7 h, y. R# P e- k
1. You have too many shoes.
1 U( P" \: |4 p$ t& ^# \
- E4 M8 d1 I7 b1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!& K0 D4 B8 M" Q6 U" a& l" \
' n( e. N& w& M: N2 R+ H1. Thank you for reading this. ^4 I. h6 ^/ _* L" j
6 B; W, V9 w' I- eYes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;- x; _5 r, h) q: y% |7 D* v
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
; V% l+ @! N) p, Z4 Y0 [
% U% ]" j" h/ o) A9 r0 e1 \Pass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.+ C& G! I9 {( T2 j; `# F
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
( C8 z" U% X0 D/ e! h- \: n