 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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& n" }. \ ~; u2 dI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.+ h/ m% e( A7 l1 ?, W! G$ p- B& a
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.: ?2 Y; [" I% A/ H* r+ \ M4 J H( [# b
) I9 t3 Y. R) {& H- \I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:0 ]4 b; j9 z6 W
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"2 ^2 n# n* B O# A; x
1 a# N* l# @/ [, x: o0 R2 m' ?I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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( C" e% ?8 \: J0 d! A4 B+ ~- I& XAnd the second one was:2 k% n5 ^9 d" a# E% @) F. M
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?: ]& h' I+ y. H
/ D& `: t, `7 s- c1 j1 i" T"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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, {" T) K7 }3 k* s6 s8 fI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?% {, h x4 ^6 ^! v G) E* @1 L$ P
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!: i% Z1 }% I( z7 ?/ w% r
% x' G9 m. t i$ I8 HI just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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2 s" _5 b0 o" z; w' V+ ?Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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0 H; I! Q3 w7 V4 b0 zThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.1 b- v" a, t6 g* C* N8 k
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Thank you very much!! q# V. u# k/ J
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:9 J5 Q: R+ t8 e" w# a, H
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.5 K3 a% }0 X2 B6 a; J
7 G) k9 d: e/ ^2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.+ ?, R% |5 H u' a) m: n$ H
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".6 [7 Y+ D. z' p7 Y6 w3 [" {
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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The denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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