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5 w! a% k* Y* S D4 K. e0 YWhy did God make mothers?, a( ]4 ]% F# i' n* g
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
+ e* Y& T$ r6 `& {5 {3 K3 J) A2. Mostly to clean the house. % Y2 f; Y# x! M1 u) B0 s
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. 9 G. [# R* A' p1 K) A& V+ M! G
% X" ^0 h* ]2 yHow did God make mothers?
B; E' d7 O( }) U1 V1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
& x; E o, [$ i: `2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. ! Z5 r/ v) R5 y! @
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. 8 h$ a- | M% Q, ~6 H* K
& S4 v" L/ J- y+ qWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? * J! |$ h, v' Y' ~
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 1 w+ B5 e" F3 D. Y; c6 ^
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
/ O) m p+ M* I- b3 P1. We're related.
I; B7 L: w7 W5 W: `2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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What kind of little girl was your mom? $ q2 M8 p: y+ Y5 [# }
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. 4 ?' C G9 X. E6 P: K
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
) E* j1 z5 X+ l; n# E3. They say she used to be nice.
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him? 0 T' o/ H2 E, I' N2 @! p5 h( i7 H( x! p
1. His last name.0 @- a' J) [9 ]2 U# O7 O
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
0 D8 u* V }" u8 o3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? % Y- u& E: |8 R6 A+ m7 D4 n
0 N8 u" S# [9 n/ B; b$ \* yWhy did your mom marry your dad? " b A1 [: P6 W( l0 G5 ?: z
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
3 x, H, \) {) o/ g$ Y/ J: p6 d2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
/ q0 E1 B" G. c! g. O9 q4 V3 A3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 2 ]$ ^6 z a5 O8 S
+ g! H; x2 X- N N$ MWho's the boss at your house? ' b+ G+ W5 z5 M) i
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball. 3 D' w1 F2 P. O _) j& ?8 i
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.5 }- a- B1 P0 t5 m
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. ) D( P- T+ k- }; V4 ?4 C- I
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What's the difference between moms & dads?
- s# U0 j& q% ]( v$ D1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. ! Q) C" L# ^( s$ p' f
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
, Q* U2 H7 Y$ d% S6 D( a0 _3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
8 x3 b% j* m! F2 K* f4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. " J. b# i, c, n9 ^3 `/ Q3 h9 X
+ B& J+ p( h4 E, r( v TWhat does your mom do in her spare time? 6 ^: H( A- ]6 [) q1 J
1. Mothers don't do spare time." R' t9 E' k) I% n7 T3 f
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.
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What would it take to make your mom perfect? 6 I/ G6 N. T2 ^$ q ]5 X
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.9 i, O/ q( v2 y6 e% C
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. : E4 R+ l C$ e* I8 P
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
# I6 `& G# S+ M6 G* C) ]1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
; |6 j) b: Y! N% c% \$ D2 z2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.7 d* q4 Q4 Z- m( t1 t& @0 R9 b9 k3 o& f
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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