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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA& p# \% e+ Q( Z& w8 A
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
6 m0 f. Y' D: F% a0 Q9 }) n, u2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
% U- m! k) W9 ], ]/ K3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
' y& r- y, q4 z$ G, G4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. % |; s$ d) b ?) Q$ l0 q
5. Weed / U) u1 R2 d% L# P
0 l, I" H. F ^8 WTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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8 `- [5 G# H5 o1. Big rock between you and B.C. " v9 k& o" C. M3 r
2. Ottawa who?
5 u+ d" ^+ F( I0 |3 {3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
' ? \4 g5 @! U; Y4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. $ j" F8 E" m( d- A
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. " @* v- [) T |0 P8 j" d) V4 R
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. 1 t0 j3 M; r; W4 d) A
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN ; g, a& Z4 E4 L* W
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1. You never run out of wheat.
0 G# C# h0 z/ [7 v& C1 Z6 z9 P5 T/ e2. Your province is really easy to draw. 1 X6 Y& ^4 z6 {: p% O. n8 G" ]
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
0 g5 o4 j h5 e4 }4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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; y5 v& @# H" g: g1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
8 C l- i% ~7 Z8 Z; r2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
0 s% q, v; c$ Z9 \. Z3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
2 `1 E& ?# J9 g1 x9 k4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. 7 W% K$ ^# h! {$ P% b3 `
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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9 O. w+ P" w" a2 p6 m! J1. You live in the centre of the universe.
" V! \9 X4 s9 M2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
$ y( R* f. T. u, a6 b- v3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. % ?. d" @5 f8 g0 }( f
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime. 2 d! _# y0 q+ K* i9 k) Z) A
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC ! v4 i; J6 E t4 q9 w3 w
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1. Racism is socially acceptable
7 ]# ?- l; ?9 c2 m+ z2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. & f' T0 v% ^6 F4 e& j
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. 6 n, U1 k( w; W g! v3 s \
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
4 s6 O- n/ N0 Y. R$ r( }2 W9 aTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK $ J! r9 j( S2 l4 \% d' x
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
1 e* E- A$ H' F5 J2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. : r; @2 K( J* E- T+ p
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick % u, c( \' s4 x- x) f/ U, j
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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5 h3 J, P! Q: S, S! T# g6 HTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA 6 `) G, ^* z2 e4 F* ?$ L! u
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+ a: B+ m9 o6 j1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
: h; ^* ?: Z6 t# _9 A/ |5 I. Q2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. / t8 Q t+ F" ~* h& ]
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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, F7 Z. ]4 K4 A% E; I0 a! H% L- j7 _+ V" [1 Y1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. ' X" I7 U" [4 m5 b' r1 W
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
/ {4 ^ Z6 g3 J- W3. You can drive across the province in two minutes.
5 t+ B! l, }' }3 j! W- z+ }4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
* T; U* V$ K8 b! F5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
5 s5 d" i, Q/ v- ^6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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& ^5 z L& M* ?5 DTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
6 a0 Y, E8 K2 p& x! a$ t2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. , C' q) L9 b0 u- @: o: Z. b$ o
3. The workday is about two hours long. ) C. h: `/ e |. N& j: \
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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