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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA W% a0 A, b( N& r0 A5 x
) h/ u2 Q, u0 p1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
6 R, }6 M" f8 x- M3 }& H l& Y5 p: {2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
9 O8 J/ R# I: k' u3 ~! K3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
1 n7 @+ Y1 @0 h, j/ r; d ^4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. , c0 m9 P- f9 h
5. Weed
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA # J* ~2 b# @8 F2 Y# V/ {# [' g
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
9 ^% h5 p! H+ [3 C$ z5 }9 i @2. Ottawa who?
+ i: a2 |" D! b" F2 w3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. ) t1 d, s! V/ p' m7 n
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. ( n, ]: C( N- k: r1 z, t' B
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
& L4 e7 s# A$ p Q9 U! ]6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. ( W8 b& {8 z- m
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" G8 U# T2 h6 o, x2 A# Z% m! h; gTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN ; Q0 q4 A( p( d% f+ f
% _ K# p, y/ Z1. You never run out of wheat. ) e& V- d3 `' F" }$ C
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
7 W3 D4 R% ~) G0 A3 z3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
# T- `0 h% p* {) D4. People will assume you live on a farm. & g8 h+ Q2 |( y0 q
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA 0 H4 _/ Q2 X$ {
% |) S/ Z1 j2 C- [( B1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property. 2 C0 z$ l% n: `0 w$ Y) N9 \' c1 ~
2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. + x/ d( {/ \; S% i
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. " I2 s& L5 j/ I& r q2 A. C7 |$ L/ T
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. ) w, L- h$ U g& h# |
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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$ K6 P5 h% k+ Y1 y9 p1. You live in the centre of the universe.
0 ^- Q1 G' e7 N4 a# j0 g7 A2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
+ t% p+ X q, \2 O9 L" |* L6 T9 i3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. + d% B" ]4 E) i9 K9 u* x$ d
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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1 U& F2 N+ g; q' n, FTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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2 R& t4 _$ Y, j" q0 o" h; E1. Racism is socially acceptable 7 z8 C/ s1 P( p4 t( \( h
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
7 u; V9 Y( P$ _( X# Y3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada. * Y1 t/ F7 p% K
4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
6 t; F: n% i# A, zTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK % a" W1 D; a! p) P# _
, U5 p/ D- I/ e S- xTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK . r* S# p. J; W4 M4 q
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. 7 B# a" y1 N+ i R. ~/ z% s
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies.
* ]5 a1 L' c$ Q% Y! D/ _3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
) A& C8 P/ Q8 ?4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse. $ q& |! h5 O, [% \" K
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA
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1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. # t0 D+ a! G: K1 K5 O! T, O
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt. 2 P1 z( A6 \" ]; k+ ], d
3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. ( E! M. T; y/ s8 O5 U8 F& ^+ s% I3 [, w
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7 j2 G( g. Z9 sTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND . t; H) m! r/ i6 h: k- R3 N
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. ! h7 z$ Z$ e. V, v
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
* H1 S+ H/ T0 b! a# _) Y3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. 7 r# k1 `! U% k
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." 3 ~0 V$ I1 X K! s+ G: j! G+ g1 y
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from. ! T/ B0 e# t$ q3 R' `) F* d
6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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8 x' h- D# b8 K" Q" LTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND - ]4 m0 \; V. i* e+ g5 C
5 v5 r- o/ Q5 \: g5 J4 d1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea. 4 V! ~) x& S2 z
2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
9 n/ B6 B% `2 {/ a) v: w3. The workday is about two hours long.
1 @6 C0 S: B) i: y1 d+ ]( j/ z1 |( P4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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