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In the garden of my heart

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发表于 2006-6-25 01:05 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!
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( F" c- ^; l  b4 m) l8 @, wIn the garden of my heart6 Z  C% c) b9 Y( m
You planted a tree
! f: S+ o6 ]7 v- ~  z4 H. _8 \From sunset til dawn( ?# ~( Y: M4 y9 M5 e3 \+ }
Through darkness to light
- v* x: m, ?6 k( l* f) ]2 fNourished with my soul
, T- `5 ]- N. h2 pDevoured my sorrow by thee8 i3 Y7 n' L& J5 w

9 P$ E+ Y' [. P. @) b* JIn the memory of my life: x# i" T2 r, \# q8 X
You planted a dream
7 e4 O* R# J# n. \! S# {8 H6 iShould the sky fall down on me
& ?2 ]: r  |8 j5 |- PMay promises fade in the sea) y( Y( t: K& T, T$ y9 b/ i; c! W+ [
Sewing back every broken pieces; M/ p2 \7 E3 W* {
Bursting the love out of me
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[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:08 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
6 t3 t; ]0 Q, ~6 ]5 v听《All I want to do...》有感,涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑,见笑!2 {7 ~: j. O/ v( V/ }5 o
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In the garden of my heart6 h2 g" ]: Y. }
You planted a tree
0 c; D: Y4 A4 O! u& `; ^From sunset til dawn
* P4 X9 T/ ?1 E- GThrough darkness to light
, s* k: t0 h# w, B/ x3 jNourished with my soul$ u( b( z: L* A# s
Devoured my so ...

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) j3 A3 g; Y6 z$ }! {5 O$ s2 a6 U5 v眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?
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写得真好。
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加精加精!
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:20 | 显示全部楼层
哥们儿,你没喝多吧?没事就过来烧烟啊!
理袁律师事务所
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发表于 2006-6-25 01:26 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
汗!居然有2单词不认识。:(
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发表于 2006-6-25 03:41 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
4 z0 i, Q' L, U/ I5 A眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧?* s9 H$ S8 S8 X% ?: G$ l+ J
写得真好。7 Z$ J; g; I+ h* k) ^0 M
加精加精!

" v* s1 ~  F8 A/ W- o我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗
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发表于 2006-6-25 05:31 | 显示全部楼层
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。
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发表于 2006-6-29 09:57 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表$ d) X* L# }5 R% Q& v9 ^
如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下,在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

$ Q+ {' \" q: D8 l五月JJ这个意境,想想实在是罗曼蒂克,不过在爱屯,海天相接是没有了,只有在湖畔雪山了:)
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发表于 2006-6-29 11:06 | 显示全部楼层
Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.. i# j7 U2 `4 p' V
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Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-6-29 18:23 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表' y8 D  ^) }/ ?% e: W2 `; v& @
Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.) o: R: Q8 l/ ]$ N( d) D  g  j

4 r1 Z5 f4 P+ q7 kSewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.
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9 r$ ~3 }2 N' U! e- E: jThanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.
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* j8 D* ]: D% L: K/ ^3 i% q" [1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".
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2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.
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发表于 2006-6-30 01:17 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民,但很喜气!很有乐在其中的意境啊!
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发表于 2006-7-2 10:50 | 显示全部楼层
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
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Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
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发表于 2006-7-2 13:50 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表& ^0 q+ o& ?) g6 \
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
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Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
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诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.
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 楼主| 发表于 2006-7-2 13:56 | 显示全部楼层
同言同羽 置业良晨
原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表; H1 g, h; _# V9 @* C8 ?
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。+ ?; F6 m( S6 ]& x% y% P: _
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Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?
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有啊,有很多经典的例子。
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比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》
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Don't weep at my grave
) D- u% n0 ]" @" m& l. y( zFor I am not there,8 ~7 m8 {0 v* y7 @- K0 e7 E
I've a date with a butterfly
' ^# I. o  G) `) l! j% rTo dance on the air.
: l: M/ j2 X- }$ [7 B/ K  HIf I'm missed, find a flower,' B$ \% p& O2 W) f
I'll be there too,- A! Y- c$ A) M8 B" T4 N7 v
Sniffing it's fragrance
- v/ h+ f: _0 _' B! MRight next to you.
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Don't be sad
3 @, f+ B; w: ?9 d/ Z9 V4 hWhen you remember me,
- f4 D1 V6 b7 `4 Q. @2 v! r7 _For I'm singing in the sunshine,
5 |& {# y8 C/ Z- @Wild and free,' Y- d  `9 l* P8 U: H$ ], v
Flirting with the lighting,5 a0 e# g. q+ `: |8 q' k/ S0 b. t2 j  X  g
Playing tag with the wind,6 {5 Z( s: c4 V- J3 ]1 g
Chasing the thunder1 |; I' I6 f/ G/ _; N; J
Time and again,9 M3 y  X. Q- ]. \
Soaring with the eagle,, E! i; G, |3 [. s* O
Swimming in the sea,
1 k2 Y9 {' t1 B3 d7 D7 Q* nEnjoying all of nature
! B+ B, Z. C* Q- R: C! K5 S6 y& A0 n# mWhile I'm waiting for thee.
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