In the garden of my heart

Dawson

听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！

- }  N9 }# D2 ^" |! L4 v- QIn the garden of my heart
/ w6 ~& M+ G( R8 n' f8 IYou planted a tree
( e- N* t. e% ]. b6 s2 B1 f1 Q4 tFrom sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
2 n1 w' b% b$ W# v8 m# Y& \Nourished with my soul
Devoured my sorrow by thee

2 K  i  G- |# F, o( w1 X5 q0 I- yIn the memory of my life
You planted a dream
Should the sky fall down on me
May promises fade in the sea
Sewing back every broken pieces
. `- j% l- q- }4 V2 v* z. dBursting the love out of me
* d, \7 V7 S& B0 X' I5 n- P
[mu]http://penguin.spss.sd59.bc.ca/~mqiu/images/without.mp3[/mu]

云山水月

原帖由 Dawson 于 2006-6-25 01:05 发表
/ ~2 A! K2 _' Y! ]/ t. q听《All I want to do...》有感，涂鸦了这首小诗。见笑，见笑！
: V; t6 x6 ?! o
In the garden of my heart
; m# r: p+ O/ K! j' IYou planted a tree
From sunset til dawn
Through darkness to light
$ E1 n& T3 D) }0 B2 r- S+ YNourished with my soul
+ y: ?9 J5 k6 O) I8 Y, s1 f0 P) YDevoured my so ...

3 P8 Q: P- z; |. \; Y9 x
眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？
6 [0 t4 `7 f# M- a% ?
* [) d  R3 D# ?* ~; ~* ?* J; q写得真好。

" Y* x7 p* L+ W) T+ b加精加精！

Greatwall

哥们儿，你没喝多吧？没事就过来烧烟啊！

九月

汗！居然有２单词不认识。：（

Justing

原帖由 云山水月 于 2006-6-25 01:08 发表
眼没花哈。。。第一首本版的英文诗吧？
0 Z* C7 H! D6 }9 C0 I# H5 u$ U写得真好。
加精加精！

# t, Y% g; o4 S& Z1 m/ K. v  D( O我曾在本版也发过一首英文诗

五月

如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

微澜

原帖由 五月 于 2006-6-25 05:31 发表
& ]. p& O" w+ L; k. ^5 d如果能谱上曲, 夕阳西下，在海天相接的海边, 轻抚吉他浅唱, 定是首动人的心曲。

五月JJ这个意境，想想实在是罗曼蒂克，不过在爱屯，海天相接是没有了，只有在湖畔雪山了：）

朱顺顺

Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
+ u" u4 a! m# |' R, Z1 ?1 U
Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

Dawson

原帖由 红岫添乱 于 2006-6-29 11:06 发表
Should the sky fall down on me--- leave out "down", as is  no good here.
+ C4 f' ~# E1 c2 m, m6 K) g
# A. S! N. l9 R+ `  e" v! t2 ]Sewing back every broken pieces--- every broken piece, or all broken pieces.

% J: k7 Y+ [$ m' p5 S! mThanks for your insightful comment, however I have to disagree with what you said.
  B" v% y. A; G" W; s+ C3 F" o: y
1) Sky falls down on sb. is a very common phrase or idom that's been used in a lot of occasions, meaning end of the world. For example, it was used in Savage Garden's song "truly deeply madly".

  w. f+ P4 W4 @' J( y; Z( [2) Every broken pieces, hmmm, again broken pieces is a phrase, I know grammar wise it looks awkard, but that "S" at the end puts a nice rythem to the poem.

月光宝盒

红岫添乱 这喜滋滋的头像虽很农民，但很喜气！很有乐在其中的意境啊！

FCUK

thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。

* x, W' _9 e9 O! w) _+ o8 uShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

五月

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
thee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
  [$ o& W9 g+ d# V) I% t
Shall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

$ }1 H0 k4 R4 j3 P" ~' a' R4 c0 @诗歌, 重在意境和语感, 没有那么严格教条的语法要求吧.

Dawson

原帖由 FCUK 于 2006-7-2 10:50 发表
2 ~) |: c) Y7 u4 jthee 和you, 好像没有同时用的吧。
) L* R5 m* Z( L- f4 s6 @6 Z
1 M+ i, O2 C) o. }$ t- w8 b) m0 RShall I compare thee to a Summer's day?

有啊，有很多经典的例子。

比如Sharon A. Bryington那首著名的《While Waiting For Thee》
5 t/ s. r5 L& E: ^4 w8 k. u
) Y% A; E' \4 d: b7 CDon't weep at my grave
0 x& `  D; B: H1 f; b1 gFor I am not there,
2 `* s' x! a8 V( u3 l) U9 v7 d- N0 YI've a date with a butterfly
8 y6 T( N/ ]1 c2 U5 TTo dance on the air.
If I'm missed, find a flower,
- ?1 D3 P. v9 c% |$ a' HI'll be there too,
9 m1 ^8 ]2 P! C& F" I- LSniffing it's fragrance
8 ?9 f& Y. i# k1 m* e5 FRight next to you.
8 T) R: P# z: ?7 z! n9 j
+ j; L3 V* c6 n6 ^' RDon't be sad
: i) ?$ j, N6 P* N7 N% s# ~: ?; MWhen you remember me,
0 ~, E  E- ]* M8 N+ l5 MFor I'm singing in the sunshine,
9 h: a+ L7 ?6 U4 Q, P+ b; uWild and free,
" _8 q# t, C# k2 L9 f- M) NFlirting with the lighting,
: c  G0 }( F6 Q1 f3 q+ qPlaying tag with the wind,
Chasing the thunder
. o4 l) y6 V" m+ \8 z' [Time and again,
Soaring with the eagle,
" K) c5 |; o) W4 M/ l3 RSwimming in the sea,
Enjoying all of nature
While I'm waiting for thee.