 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!
' g! z5 W2 W. I3 r% m请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写- E+ R+ a3 q. {3 o h
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.
; }7 F5 q9 q! C b1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫- h h4 a) S/ {3 P( [3 n# h
7 j+ ]( T9 t) ?; Q. O1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
# n! Y3 w. S6 K6 J+ I. z0 Edown.
?$ T4 [$ p) E9 J7 kWe need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about * C& s' Q6 ^+ k1 L' P+ m# F6 v
you( P5 q5 Y4 m/ q5 V
leaving it down.% f# h! T) F/ [0 S6 E0 _2 A8 {
1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.+ \! n O( e, T+ T( @
Let it be.
* D" G2 v1 v! u$ J- `; |5 I3 x$ }1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去! \% a6 Y8 q( |
: K9 V8 F5 G* Y* {' Y1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it/ B; D; @# r& q+ z! ^, z$ l
that way.8 N; W/ g+ t [3 ^5 d# g! d
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！
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1. Crying is blackmail.
) J, ~8 X) T4 B& t& U1，哭泣是敲诈# F( e1 S. V; F" Y" r
( v! F8 s. R/ f, }* G" ~1. Ask for what you want.
. }0 a# a' H! FLet us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!! ^6 T; N: G& U3 }: |* g
Strong hints do not work!
7 H% Q2 W0 J7 t/ z) T' JObvious hints do not work!5 b9 L# ~- s1 M7 s9 l# I
Just say it!9 H0 d, d' Z1 E3 B
1，你想要什么就说
) u% N5 ] I( s" V N% C+ g我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！9 H* J- N( A. _; B) U
8 @3 N" Q6 E* n; Z# R# `1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every ) J* k' Z* r/ c6 X% ~8 C
question.
" a3 \ m$ J7 t) p1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）0 ~) {7 ~7 Z' d& n; W
4 c/ p9 K" c5 {9 |$ b' y1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's/ i$ g9 o/ }2 S+ [
what we do.
" Y3 }% l; ?9 l+ O4 k& D2 hSympathy is what your girlfriends are for.. C/ l( Z3 L! @& C4 {* b8 ~
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。, z1 ~0 h6 [7 q2 j9 b {
0 {# [! g( B4 c/ [% }8 P1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor." ^5 c. y9 d8 Z6 ~7 y/ b" d
1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去; p: [5 @/ F4 @0 c! @- {
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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
0 c* G: F8 u: D) A! `5 |) H2 m3 ]In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.& e0 u( r @% W4 p
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us/ V2 x7 h1 R+ x5 V
to act like soap opera guys.9 o, N! }4 R8 X% J) p+ E" [ c
1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们, S5 i; p# U( h$ W0 d% ~6 G0 z
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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
- d3 h( D& s& ^% n5 S1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们0 p: s2 t4 n8 ?! x" l8 G1 ?, V
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
, @" t% z5 t3 E2 H4 }makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.; }7 W' m8 v' _% [7 r
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。9 H6 h& E) t8 r. P: y
, Z1 X8 F( w. y( H0 p（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢）" X, R5 V, K9 d( y0 z `! |
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it$ X' h2 V4 V* @0 g. t$ F8 ?1 ?+ O: u
done. Not both./ o" d8 C( k7 Q' E9 z
If you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself.- ^4 ~4 W5 h0 C2 W$ h
2 u& \) {% `, D# M# o1 D1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during4 n" m% d* }# d: ]0 C
commercials.% v; W d5 h- Q' [1 j
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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.3 v$ h: ~, m* M- | s3 b* H3 L' c
% ~& g& o. u) ]( E9 R1 x' X( Z1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
6 n, {: z: _' A3 O. [Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
' ^9 I. W; a* s2 F9 I( E* aWe have no idea what mauve is., y; U8 O1 ^ d" `2 A/ ^; B
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1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.$ `- S5 F. a1 P! o5 x
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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like
$ U" c* a: J G- u7 Gnothing's wrong.- U/ y3 B0 A: P, J1 G; {9 L
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.1 k; s j2 f" N1 x$ K7 [0 o, d
) P! `# C1 [ `! d0 H1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer3 f% Z T2 Q& j- K' g
you don't want to hear.
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. x3 ]7 O& K+ {) t! L% v1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is4 x9 d6 q7 \! A$ M4 l* Y
fine...Really.
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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
% a7 ^ @: ^ O) \discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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1. You have enough clothes.8 m2 R1 b# Q2 ^2 l( H! \
, K& b2 }( J& Y* c* D: b3 o3 J) D2 r0 Y1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!9 h! R- w* T# j
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1. Thank you for reading this.6 Y* Y9 x, b K$ r
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
/ |, q: T1 ~8 R8 h+ L. y4 b9 PBut did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.+ E5 e& X7 ^ @# m( n) j
( [! @3 Z* n$ W8 r) x9 lPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.' z8 b5 l+ ~0 E" C8 T l
Pass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
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发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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