 鲜花( 634)  鸡蛋( 5)
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Please note... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!* c" ?" n+ c6 y# w' b
请注意，以下序号都是1不是误写6 Z7 `# o( o$ D4 @/ |
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1. Men ARE NOT mind readers.( @( j( I7 t5 `5 ] U6 l& m4 J
1，男人不是你肚子里的蛔虫
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1 ~! s5 _1 m1 w$ D2 f4 _1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
$ b; z3 a4 Z. U4 W$ i9 s5 j/ Zdown.% d) A/ f. v M- V# _2 B
We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about 1 r. y6 d4 Y5 D5 |. e/ A _* R9 E
you
$ b! G9 b3 [" e3 G- [5 E( kleaving it down.
7 k! b9 n' V e3 A% T! W- X5 C% f1，学会使用马桶盖，你是个大姑娘了，马桶盖要是翻起来了，你就放下去。我们需要盖子翻起来，你们需要放下去，你们什么时候听骨哦我们抱怨你们把马桶盖放下去？8 i5 k/ W' N2 {7 V* z
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1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
- n& `1 G6 r# DLet it be.
7 F$ k, O$ Q# K9 s. ]5 e1 O1，周日的体育，无论它像满月还是潮汐，随他去
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) R" ]5 O7 ?8 C/ R4 o0 B4 U1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
! S0 ?5 j9 b( x8 L; }that way.6 `7 }# s9 }7 m$ \' L( O, P6 k/ @
1，购物不是体育。不，也别指望我们能那么想！1 A- o6 d9 r, b) @4 {0 {6 F1 R
$ p# n1 z. }4 y- i1. Crying is blackmail.) y- y, ?4 x l, k
1，哭泣是敲诈3 a. o& K" p3 `8 P9 A* a& Q
9 t& L# E" H7 o; x: j$ _1. Ask for what you want.8 U/ r# v( {0 _% L
Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work!$ c! r- {9 q" q% ~
Strong hints do not work!
# x9 L7 `9 U$ AObvious hints do not work!" {1 Z, A9 [' \- J+ M/ b8 f
Just say it!8 ^8 D) `$ Z2 Y. \7 D7 b ~, L4 y9 M
1，你想要什么就说
7 I: Y ` z! N# O6 y2 M我们再说得清楚点，小暗示不管用，强烈按时不管用，明显的暗示也不管用！想干吗你明说！
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+ c) v* R% z0 O) ?! Z0 i1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every
/ J- [2 |( w/ @5 w q: b \question.* U1 H: I0 ^& b3 `+ G; c
1, yes 和no 是回答问题的绝好答案。 （意思是，丈夫仅仅说是，不是，妻子不满意）
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1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's* G! N- [! Z: w% r; S* q
what we do.$ _2 A2 U0 v- y F$ y
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.) Q& u9 f; G, z7 J* e
1，如果你有麻烦，可以来找我们帮助解决，可是不要仅仅为了获取同情，那是你们女朋友的责任。/ I" M8 u! W# }/ o
K5 M8 K9 S5 F! A1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
2 y1 B5 y1 p7 F. ^* l1，你要是头疼了17个月，那你应该看医生去
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3 E& E: f/ k, O* }" ~3 Q: s: x1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
: Y8 A; z4 G0 b% \! |( T/ _& wIn fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.7 S6 ^0 [2 P0 u: P/ i$ m
我们6个月前说的话在争吵中不许再提及，事实上，我们说的话7天后就作废了
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6 \6 ]7 @- a+ N9 O1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us+ r* A: }6 ?4 ?1 p5 y- r# _
to act like soap opera guys.
4 S) j V3 q) f8 w1，如果你不能穿的像个维多利亚的秘密（性感品牌）的女孩子们，那么也别指望我们行为象肥皂剧里面的男明星们4 }- B4 x: o# m# ]" C- P
# M4 Y4 m- U' k1 |, j1 J2 y h1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
! y3 Q- j! H( c6 U3 J1，你要是觉得你胖，那你八成就胖，别问我们
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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
" p3 i5 J& a: l+ ?5 t1 zmakes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.* P. o2 I( M) n G; Y6 Z1 H
1 如果我们说的话可以被理解成两种意思，而其中一种意思令你们伤心或者愤怒，那么我们本来是另一种意思。* q0 W5 y* J1 G
' {/ k' u/ {# P! _（谁有工夫继续一下，谢谢） Q) l A+ s0 {$ ?$ X
1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it
7 I" ^; _* W& F( M; O8 gdone. Not both.
+ b$ _8 k" q7 |) H' PIf you already know best how to do it, ! just do it yourself./ L$ E h( W: R" d
$ m- n9 J3 r4 S( K* \! M1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
4 O; j! K3 a" zcommercials.$ t& V9 l9 x9 t$ L1 {
" ?: y4 k+ `4 n3 ]8 }0 K1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
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; H3 \/ j5 r4 i# N1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.% q" ?6 M( w1 y& N) C
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
8 D( z7 A" l; _0 a# wWe have no idea what mauve is.
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* K& D: Y% b+ E( U* o1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.
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: {5 D! o- z5 [& q4 \( w1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like( k9 t7 Z3 p% u+ ]
nothing's wrong." b" O8 v8 M. ~ h/ d Z% H( Q$ W
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
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2 g1 |& [, O$ q1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer" E0 ?+ O( j( V! J0 G2 J
you don't want to hear.
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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is0 V( }* g& v1 D P+ L0 b# D. {
fine...Really.& w# {: A; i7 {% d/ }# G0 g' w
* K: }% j2 ~/ G; x* {1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to
! t+ n# `2 W& Ydiscuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.
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( D6 o A+ A/ v7 V' u# R1. You have enough clothes.6 E$ O9 S9 |9 t' c
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1. You have too many shoes.
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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
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1. Thank you for reading this.! R- o( d% Z/ l, x! o: m
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Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;& R0 K/ I2 j6 ?% U7 L
But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.7 S# \) i3 @& z2 s: X
; Y: h6 \; w2 |& _) v4 lPass this to as many men as you can - to give them a laugh.
, @# I* y' s) c0 a* s! ]! hPass this to as many women as you can - to give them a bigger laugh |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2005-11-11 13:05
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发表于 2005-11-11 13:06
楼主
发表于 2005-11-11 16:47
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