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The Washington Post publishes a yearly contest in which readers are asked to invent alternate meanings for various words. 7 b) I% i, e; K, k1 X0 }% ^% e
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The following were some of this year’s winning entries:
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1. Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon.
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8 Z5 l. o0 Y4 s9 s! [( n2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have .
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' r$ M' t' x# c$ y8 [3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach. ; }/ R: h) U) _4 k! R( b0 e1 x% l
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4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk. ' E- \ y: S- H3 n- ^
* Y, x, o8 s' a) G+ ^& V5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent , ~# o% P3 L; b; z$ J
& _1 R' i7 J0 a# s6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you absentmindedly answer the door in your nightie. 9 J7 z% H" A* P/ u% f
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7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
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8. Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavoured mouthwash.
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9. Flatulence (n.) the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you are run over by a steamroller.
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6 u4 [7 p5 P r( R10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
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$ q$ \1 k" F: z" N1 d0 j& U. q" F. f3 Z2 D11. Testicle (n.), a humorous question on an exam. ) B) |: o1 V4 v$ q& T
' j2 v1 q5 W5 c; l1 g12. Rectitude (n.), the formal, dignified demeanour assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you. 4 N* c, ] K! ]& M, e. a7 w4 P
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13. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.
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14. Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts. # D& S" D- t/ f+ k2 F
z& F7 v& C7 G( K5 E3 j( [! O15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), The belief that, when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck there.
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16. Pokemon (n.), A Jamaican proctologist. |
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发表于 2009-12-2 14:01
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