 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.' m( P. o* p: d) q+ P" w" ^. f- [/ X1 v
5 F8 `) G, F& M. ?2 _+ T# jI'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:4 g5 i9 F$ [1 K
0 o$ h n+ x7 ?% v"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"* Q/ d, {1 y! T+ G: n
: P9 `: A# t0 D6 T1 H+ v+ k9 B- j" E# DI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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( v f4 ^1 e$ q X- T) HAnd the second one was:) i' J+ Q2 T4 f! r7 @! Q/ ~
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"What's the 2nd Amendment?". U. ~! Q3 o. o% z; r
4 S2 t$ N3 y/ t' wI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?4 w* r+ k) _/ D" W
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?' c0 r* o1 M7 @
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I have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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% n2 D! I5 g7 _8 U' P) \: v& [0 WSo I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"0 t5 o7 ~+ @/ n- i
2 k @3 B5 g& aNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”
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8 W4 Z' u# f' x5 {! lThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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Thank you very much!
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/ g, J a" F+ R/ R. p! k8 M* B0 WImplicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.2 z1 |5 b9 h1 | ~# N `
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2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".0 u! w3 B$ f1 U$ F/ H+ ^7 p \
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US. z/ d2 k% K1 n( F+ q# t
; E( G! h3 a( w7 x; C+ E% D Z! zThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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