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黄西在David Letterman Show上的台词[英文]

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鲜花(19) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.6 h9 {4 D& q% J' H- T
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I'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.8 K  F8 P; b. O# Z7 y; J
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I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.; E  L  c9 M2 P( Z7 r2 g0 t- P
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I worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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"Who's Benjamin Franklin?"
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6 [: U+ w+ }* C& U1 R* pI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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5 e+ q% E/ T4 z; ZAnd the second one was:
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* m* `1 M1 N" S/ ]"What's the 2nd Amendment?"7 V: O( [  K* y4 n1 [

4 _! t& `# Y* _) y  x% A$ MI was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?
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"What is Roe vs. Wade?"
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5 z6 M# o# y5 X, aI was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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+ Z/ o4 x3 L' }6 r1 g8 CI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!( u. c. x5 d* L
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."$ }& H  ^* s% D' x& z
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"
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9 q5 T4 h- H$ \; D+ V8 P. n  qNow I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”9 Y2 E* y' I* q. n

. X0 g4 }5 x$ p/ [This sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.7 r3 A: b) f& w7 K

' r/ |( O- O0 D9 cThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:7 ^. X/ _) s" C# M3 A+ ?

+ }0 H; u0 m  T9 K$ Y2 Y  L1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill.
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) B0 f5 N! g/ o) `$ V0 S! I2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".5 Q8 h+ i- l8 C9 L9 k

' j: O* ]: K: O0 kRoe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.( P+ L- d( A2 F. Y  L

5 j0 V6 Q" L% x* X! `/ Z6 nThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water".
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-5 21:39 | 显示全部楼层
the first passage is funny. I did not fully comprehend the humor until I looked for the exact meaning of stud, which means:
9 g1 \9 [# N, c: R8 a. p( ka young man, esp one who is thought to be very active sexually and is regarded as a good sexual partner 小伙子(尤指性慾旺盛堪为性伴侣的).
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-5 22:28 | 显示全部楼层
THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR YOUR SHARING. IT IS REALLY USEFUL. JOE WANG IS A FUNNY GUY AND HAS ACHIEVED AMAZING ACHIEVEMNET.
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-6 06:55 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队 追求完美
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 08:35 | 显示全部楼层
this guy is really cool.
鲜花(76) 鸡蛋(4)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:12 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。: Y4 f6 P$ `) H+ h, P) d
怎么理解?9 }) d! _" a2 e
50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 09:56 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
6# cyz0116
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不离婚,白头到老
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 10:33 | 显示全部楼层
50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever。" ?4 Y+ U" i2 U
怎么理解?
3 f" f' L7 U& J4 W1 t50%的婚姻最终走向永恒?5 ^( f$ B& ~! f! Y2 y3 K  t- j8 I8 M
cyz0116 发表于 2009-5-6 10:12

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我觉得JOE的意思可能是不离婚的比例这么高,(因为他害怕婚姻)可能他离不了婚吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-6 11:37 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
8# 朝阳
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. d: E3 o9 I; ~( Z6 V: Y! x我觉得他的意思是离婚率太高了。
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2009-5-7 19:59 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
同意朝阳的意见。原来没有认真看,觉着就是离婚率太高了。但是这样就没有什么幽默了,好玩的对方可能是为了迎合一些不爱结婚的美国人。从一而终对一些年轻人是来讲,不一定是梦想,却有可能是噩梦
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 12:12 | 显示全部楼层
表情僵硬。看第一遍没觉的,越看越觉的离专业演员差好大一截。
大型搬家
鲜花(22) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2009-5-8 21:06 | 显示全部楼层
东瞅瞅,西侃侃.
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