 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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2 c* z8 B G& s* nWhy did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.8 |' b3 y! w3 z( J7 X* P
2. Mostly to clean the house. # x" Y4 z, S* r. F
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born. ! I2 ~! a% Z2 l! z9 `$ f: T( ]
2 A( t! v5 x( l, I8 d) {How did God make mothers? : p3 E" M* z E+ w3 A0 Z$ y0 o
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.9 r, `. q: }9 ~7 ?5 a5 ]1 l
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 5 @4 s% g; b+ Q$ h" k6 f7 C. w
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. ( e, D) K7 K/ |' {+ E5 k! x
# V3 J2 p3 f; c' @% H* K9 @6 fWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? * ^1 {, l0 Y* w3 |3 B4 X7 f
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. 1 E: W$ \0 `! P8 l, j4 p( k
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. + n+ H# ~- ~7 S
- @8 k. L- |4 B: G" J8 @Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
# I* P( }) m& b8 s( o' x/ G1. We're related.
( U) [7 T" x$ [! N2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. / ]# T8 e0 R6 q* J
0 ?9 I. Q) @6 ], V6 _What kind of little girl was your mom?
( F2 Z5 W3 V7 I. t0 Z. `, U( I2 x2 O1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
0 i. T$ t* ~9 c# e+ z/ k; y, y G/ f2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
' `- |* R( W$ ~0 h: Z* V5 R3. They say she used to be nice. " ]! |! @* \' y0 t
( Q5 ], Z: |+ g: B) Z* O2 t1 C" rWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him? + w! w6 R" e: F0 b
1. His last name.
1 B( r/ L/ k" Y+ C! C# _/ T2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?6 ~; y' u: t1 k/ A3 l
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? & }; v! i" Q2 m# K
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Why did your mom marry your dad?
6 o5 w! {# ?9 u+ a! e, v7 |1 ^1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. ( A, n- ?/ h7 @
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
1 C# ^4 [1 h+ |/ q8 Z1 G3 C3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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Who's the boss at your house? : ]! t# m: L5 O9 |% Y7 d( o R
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
. v; N6 I8 M& v0 l2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
1 e4 Z5 e& X7 p& S4 |2 G) a3 I3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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; Y" t3 g: O0 f+ DWhat's the difference between moms & dads?
2 n k. |+ G' ~( Z1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
9 p; \) S1 f" N$ K0 M' e2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
; I' Y% z$ \% G. h+ b( s/ ]/ @3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. $ e# \) N9 U+ f
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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! w* t5 v0 ^: n: p% b8 C) ]# f0 NWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
) z, k; R, P3 C" M. }; s1. Mothers don't do spare time.6 S* K$ g" n0 B& c' {1 P
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. ; ?9 g! G# \+ w) G, x
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
; ]7 |* i' ?; J, f I6 {1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.. W9 C( g! ]0 U7 Z5 d$ B9 g
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 8 B" d5 X0 s) t+ ?( v# b# n9 _; ~3 h
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be? # {. M* e' E7 r+ ^. H$ V
1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. " N, c7 o) V! ^% I! d2 M) b, c4 S
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.) ?3 m5 g- w/ F6 N7 L, S. t5 t
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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