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3 V% i$ W3 _% R# B, H5 bWhy did God make mothers?
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.) J9 X) o |3 o
2. Mostly to clean the house. ) }; Q5 w7 J! h+ ~( ?
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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How did God make mothers? ; l% a" X) P7 Z0 }4 K
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
* D. ^/ F& O5 m) |; t2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 7 G% }5 h! Y* z1 a4 j( u& E, k
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. * k% L5 l5 S |8 a4 _" P
! w- B7 e' f5 V/ JWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? $ ~6 ?6 ], v/ [% p3 \
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
/ J- E* J w: c; r4 v2 X2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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7 z1 Q4 A" P& F* bWhy did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
2 p: c$ E) Q. U, W5 x1. We're related.& H N0 E# [% N. N& W
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. # o; r% X( {4 ?: K2 s+ H* V N& j, H
* x& x9 m) I9 U3 F/ B+ m7 l0 @What kind of little girl was your mom?
+ U p) I+ n4 u1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
7 [% c& l5 y/ ]; e) `3 J7 \( T2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. ! f2 a4 ]% P4 a& E! K8 ^
3. They say she used to be nice. 3 x$ x$ | q' E. y, o
( \; ^: V# l) d) u* l4 [* QWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
: T x$ k" s2 B7 H$ A1. His last name.! p3 ? U* p# R0 P) O, c' Q% \' ]3 n
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
* i- K: \" G4 C7 i- E/ }- r) W Q3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?
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Why did your mom marry your dad?
* M, O: _, [+ H4 ^% Z9 R1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. , E1 h& f) j) Y3 W
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3 {, x' G) I0 Z, K0 ]& C7 O% q: D3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 5 J4 q. |! Q8 l: Z9 n, h% H: l
3 g1 }5 X+ j8 M: w# QWho's the boss at your house?
`' W# ^# S) U2 w1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
3 x5 @6 P }' F m7 R2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
# [) O4 S7 T. M# F1 z5 b3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. $ |* y1 z/ d( V$ h! h
. j0 r$ B2 F' q8 |' x7 f/ W" lWhat's the difference between moms & dads? 2 G" i5 n4 I2 ^
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. 4 F3 }2 _; r( H5 G3 P& ?
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
! s6 R# R, u: b& Y' W" Y2 W3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. : J6 n. W( K i- {! F6 e
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. , |9 |6 O% S6 i
, p* ~6 @/ Q; J/ _What does your mom do in her spare time? ( m# {' e" F" l
1. Mothers don't do spare time.' M% n4 O% o5 C* K
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. 1 C* t& E7 _6 }2 i3 u( K4 P
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
. y1 a4 ]. Y; q+ ?1 ^! }1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
7 R; H( |3 @& g6 U9 U2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 7 ^6 A& u) H' g% X4 ~
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
2 o8 o: `0 e( B, V' I' W1 q3 \1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
. z6 w' L- V6 s2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
1 n) I5 ~4 M0 E6 D3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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