 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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+ f7 h8 ?0 }0 R8 c* V( a' w3 L4 ]Why did God make mothers?. Z( U. z& e0 _& F/ M7 i( u
/ n7 X2 Q5 c" H4 ?; V6 q. g1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
! D% Y" O& T( A' T# Q! Y2. Mostly to clean the house. * O2 d8 L# D1 S
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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& Y& r- {/ Z+ CHow did God make mothers? , z! j u$ Z9 ?/ e
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
( a+ R5 f- B4 L( G7 K9 y5 A) l8 c0 v2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 6 q! s: X; A) E! C7 o2 E) U
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.
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/ D7 k* Y% W" X( M/ i+ q! ?3 AWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? 1 |4 G9 v) _# a' A; ~% q
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. & T2 b3 o0 B* h( w+ n# T# I
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think. $ `: [# G4 C e7 a: _
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?
# p8 Z1 f& V L% [# X% B+ z1. We're related.
! ~5 s7 J4 |% E* j& `+ _2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. : i/ k, `# Z6 x }
" w3 _, r5 k+ @3 J9 W4 S6 ?What kind of little girl was your mom?
- a; p3 N/ f4 j& F1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff. ; I3 f& J, Y& _3 b) @
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
& u& j$ H7 A0 K- H* `3. They say she used to be nice.
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$ n* j. t% @+ p) e8 vWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
' y- {! ~6 x5 J0 @1. His last name.
9 e; ]& i- c Q$ P2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?, i5 X# ]$ D5 {: T1 h9 ]9 V" c
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? ( [1 u0 N" m# \' J, l! F5 o
- o* X& C( K5 a: j K4 NWhy did your mom marry your dad? 1 n* d! W- K" H5 v% P& A
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. $ p% M# J2 B+ r! W7 x0 u
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. # Y+ m; G& ?# N7 y7 d' Z9 m( |
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. 3 P1 X4 L1 W: @' \3 m# L
- w0 Y/ D# m3 M) e) F$ h: EWho's the boss at your house?
0 U% N2 i# @ N5 X# A1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
) s8 J1 q) t/ b$ J2 S( e2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
4 W; b6 O, h1 b3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. + S! L# m0 m" S
2 m. K+ a- K' VWhat's the difference between moms & dads? & z" u& k* o* o% m' V+ T# O
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work. + ]: m, \: k3 y+ E
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
1 Y: \5 O* l! S3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
) x" R$ L; M3 i/ F4 p4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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What does your mom do in her spare time? , T, S0 n1 I0 O0 M. n2 ]. x7 v( u- t
1. Mothers don't do spare time.7 n- S `8 ~# l- `
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. . F7 ^) I4 T, O3 F5 d$ ~
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
$ E+ z- @6 p1 ?1 o* O# C1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
$ T/ @* _2 H+ n2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. 4 b8 o5 h9 S0 Q. C3 S
5 L* s& n6 l% j; z% b8 IIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
; e* u$ Y6 i" t; V1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
' W# I/ M" Y5 k. w7 z2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
/ D6 z0 v$ A% l+ D: I* S9 s* q3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. * ]; o6 L6 G4 }& m% y
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