 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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Why did God make mothers?
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/ w) T: I5 u* Z1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
+ m5 j7 }/ a# b: c6 z8 z9 v' R" G2. Mostly to clean the house.
/ G b |+ A$ `' S# m3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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- h8 k/ b0 C( ~/ [0 G* N- {How did God make mothers?
: ]* h& E. K! C- b3 R+ K8 L( M1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
- V/ I* ]& L4 U$ `: k w2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
2 C! o; M" U% j/ q' `& T1 ]" |3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. 9 Z5 H( g0 C+ t; Q
9 [! @! \# L% N7 F6 H ?& v6 N/ w2 q6 GWhat ingredients are mothers made of ?
3 Z5 ]! W# G" T# t4 E. \1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean. % F0 N- g8 @5 Y3 i: r! N9 l
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? 5 H: ~. q6 n7 c: e, O9 x/ l
1. We're related.
5 q E6 j6 U, [4 B. V+ O' v2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me.
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3 s3 d1 |7 M0 K8 ]What kind of little girl was your mom? 9 ?5 {" f2 W# e1 _* i
1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
" z8 H: R2 x- V g; J! n2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy. * [6 {" ^9 a6 x) }/ Y' I W+ B
3. They say she used to be nice. ' K2 w3 k+ W; }
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What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
/ T! h: E" `, }/ C3 r+ j# d( i# X1. His last name.
2 V, l2 r+ h4 z2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?- B3 K6 h4 v: g+ l$ S3 P
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? 0 \9 C/ O5 d5 w9 E" ]! D' _8 R
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Why did your mom marry your dad? 6 ~9 B5 e, j9 z8 `
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot. ; M: t2 a" [+ f* p6 n" |
2. She got too old to do anything else with him. * X- f% A6 X, k& ~& Q7 _; I
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on. + `% }, Z4 w( H( W$ j! c- l1 z
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Who's the boss at your house? - R. U# h5 D1 d8 F" p5 \1 k
1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
# I$ G, h, e9 j9 w2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
& J! f- G/ R3 b3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad. 2 u m$ g( ?2 @$ S
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What's the difference between moms & dads? 7 P3 T( g* |5 s& U r
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
0 t- ^- f, B0 Q& Z H% E2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.% v/ m+ b* w* I: y# n9 X; v$ Q
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's.
+ s7 j) `' T8 @- \3 W7 c1 X4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine. $ l4 X0 ]9 ]& j& N0 R
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What does your mom do in her spare time? / w* H* N2 ]) R, B# n l7 ?
1. Mothers don't do spare time.
1 C( O. _: X; ~9 [5 B2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. X( |5 ]1 a% e$ y/ H8 F( u* S3 E: B
9 C9 |8 A$ W8 F9 C! S% lWhat would it take to make your mom perfect? 4 J* G8 \9 B/ A1 W2 v+ D: ]
1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.0 M3 i, ]6 m' v. T, x- Z
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue. ; {/ c3 Y% v9 N
0 K" Q8 T/ u0 b# y% mIf you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
: S2 O$ o" m, N9 J3 [+ R# J1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
" m5 A# ?# Q9 C7 \+ g2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.8 a) T, _1 Q0 `+ k2 N
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head. f3 p3 G4 l& C6 X) n ?& B
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