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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA9 v! l4 x4 U8 x+ S0 N1 }8 d# _
- k+ {) ~: A: a( e5 h3 R! H% `( u1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math.
7 b+ i# i' W$ I' `2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
! @. D! F+ {3 j0 m4 \( k3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations. * e4 M/ J& ^5 H4 \. x
4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on. : f F: y3 S2 A# N
5. Weed # C2 r0 ~. V$ T) | u) n: q
) {" s: K# v* i; qTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA
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5 G5 X1 d1 ]$ V) C) P2 ?1. Big rock between you and B.C.
' \" a. P J1 V1 N" {% N2. Ottawa who?( [; y+ V& K" ~) F8 v( V1 A
3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country. , n+ s' `3 u5 n' B
4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. 8 y! m, R- z7 K: Y* }* Y& {
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country.
" P4 j, N( z) e( b) E" ]6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups. 3 {& `2 I3 X( b
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN ) @+ o4 ]9 `- ?3 n4 [( u
) r+ ~8 J' U; E, {% D9 _0 W4 _/ }1. You never run out of wheat. * h2 p4 E7 d4 f3 j% F
2. Your province is really easy to draw.
& i' T% p {; o# X4 R3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
- i% D$ f$ p6 |2 _# i7 r: |4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA
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" o6 r. |, R# i0 v: p1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
% w! D% E4 M/ f& K2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes.
9 m: w, M/ s& h$ q3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter. ; q& {; G6 j; ]- b6 z# F6 {
4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood. % A% l" q$ n9 y3 @0 [, s
5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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+ j, k4 E2 L+ w& ETOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO 1 u+ c$ G$ w L8 f- A' x1 g2 e* h# M4 f* q
2 W4 R" l5 c* s, |, G1 t8 Y1. You live in the centre of the universe.
- c: E* q$ R$ F. Y) T2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump.
, n: Q7 S9 d, m( L. `3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election. 3 U9 F# Z3 g, s
4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
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6 }% U) B6 b1 K5 K$ s1. Racism is socially acceptable
+ K/ G4 N5 ?4 b9 P7 B# K2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next. + r' Y% v$ J/ f! B+ r
3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
6 T/ J+ P! m O) y$ V4 u/ ^4 I- d4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *
$ y$ t! D$ B- O. V$ ]" `TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK ) U/ O9 x' z: O8 _1 M' C) j, o0 g- S
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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! S/ R! P* k4 N0 } X! X5 ]- C% g1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income.
& W7 N! a% t' v, G0 J- n0 e- w/ w2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. " X8 f3 Q" \" P$ Y6 D
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick
' M! p8 e L; T3 a8 t/ k4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA 7 x1 f* k5 \' F) {3 I$ M
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' s7 c; M7 w1 Z8 B" h1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can.
. h$ ]$ y1 S3 @2 }3 s2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
5 N. _: D$ c! S$ y( u" T3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND 6 p4 r3 e* d: B* K
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. ( Q$ C. V1 Z8 M
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour.
- l* b' O! ]8 ? E' d* u: p- s3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. , r' n; ]# y ^* p# O7 c
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea."
- P* a5 R& v/ I3 y1 R4 }5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
% Z3 z+ b3 Y1 l6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night. , `4 f2 N. b m- z4 b4 c
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND " O, Y% a! J4 `7 z) y) ?0 J) n
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1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
; u( u, T$ S3 h- K2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse. % I' v9 g2 X% T4 M+ X0 I
3. The workday is about two hours long. . Z- X7 h: D2 W y
4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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