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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN BRITISH COLUMBIA
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1. Vancouver: 1.5 million people and two bridges. You do the math. 6 q/ T) _0 ?+ C1 d( `: q% a" N3 R
2. Your $400,000 Vancouver home is just 5 hours from downtown.
% ]* Z5 g+ V9 ]$ Z3. You can throw a rock and hit three Starbucks locations.
% b+ [8 C5 ^" B% D4. There's always some sort of deforestation protest going on.
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$ B$ z9 q5 _5 X; G$ I U; @TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ALBERTA - `0 G1 A/ Y8 G5 Z
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1. Big rock between you and B.C.
2 {$ y- {( z* b4 {* M2. Ottawa who?
" y8 C& Q4 f( x+ n5 L3. Tax is 6% instead of approximately 20% as it is for the rest of the country.
& `' C, ~6 @% a B4. You can exploit almost any natural resource you can think of. + `; P+ Y( C$ R) T8 e
5. You live in the only province that could actually afford to be its own country. * D# o& a0 K+ L
6. The Americans below you are all in anti-government militia groups.
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' D' V9 {: G0 D3 t) I9 D% kTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN SASKATCHEWAN # f6 I1 P; c7 A% K- T1 d
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1. You never run out of wheat. . X8 e. W1 s/ D5 G( a% o& r$ b7 W
2. Your province is really easy to draw. * W$ I% W& C0 g* l6 Y6 H" L
3. You can watch the dog run away from home for hours.
$ |/ e6 }6 C, e& w4. People will assume you live on a farm.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN MANITOBA : o# Z e+ Z* e6 q
2 _6 Z& [$ @! c7 Y$ i$ E1. You wake up one morning to find that you suddenly have a beachfront property.
3 m8 V. u! U; S$ o/ L6 U2. Hundreds of huge, horribly frigid lakes. # N. v: d) N0 w1 Q! F$ C
3. Nothing compares to a wicked Winnipeg winter.
) n: I+ @4 g" ]. S( h% k4. You can be an Easterner or a Westerner depending on your mood.
: v; q! }, b0 u' L: ~, u& V7 l& Z5. You can pass the time watching trucks and barns float by.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN ONTARIO
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1. You live in the centre of the universe. * o5 R/ ~7 W, g1 G* J( j' ~5 H& k
2. Your $400,000 Toronto home is actually a dump. + I/ i9 `0 N& o) z
3. You and you alone decide who will win the federal election.
* y" c' Q# M1 Q, M* a8 U4. The only province with hard-core American-style crime.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC ! Z! w9 @' H5 X# N0 E6 ?
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1. Racism is socially acceptable 5 B+ C6 P v2 @/ c) L* H9 E
2. You can take bets with your friends on which English neighbour will move out next.
% U m$ E* t/ I: X9 F7 b( H3. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada.
0 O4 l& ?. \/ D# r) A4. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo *9 v+ V' u. R S7 e- J1 M
TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK 4 [" J; I4 m8 i% e$ ^' q
( A. N) M0 I9 ~, LTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEW BRUNSWICK
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1. One way or another, the government gets 98% of your income. ' s! x7 i8 I$ e2 U
2. You're poor, but not as poor as the Newfies. $ z, Y j/ L9 [6 j* b
3. No one ever blames anything on New Brunswick 3 B2 F% q# \: M, I" F
4. Everybody has a grandfather who runs a lighthouse.
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NOVA SCOTIA ' T0 x' m! M+ B* U1 P, u
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2 ]7 C3 U* F2 b! T! P9 q% w1. Everyone can play the fiddle. The ones who can't, think they can. # J% i# [( v$ L# u/ l
2. You can pretend to have Scottish heritage as an excuse to get drunk and wear a kilt.
5 T0 w+ R. l7 F9 B- u7 F( Q3. You are the only reason Anne Murray makes money. 7 D5 N6 b7 Y: @
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TOP REASONS TO LIVE IN PRINCE EDWARD ISLAND
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1. Even though more people live on Vancouver Island, you still got the big, new bridge. 1 q" [0 P4 o' A. F. S! ~
2. You can walk across the province in half an hour. ; K- m+ m3 u$ X; c
3. You can drive across the province in two minutes. 7 b* W) \+ H3 A! o8 Z# E' K7 q9 x
4. Everyone has been an extra on "Road to Avonlea." 9 [8 O0 A' G9 p8 j
5. This is where all those tiny, red potatoes come from.
3 A4 j, N0 ^3 i i! L _6. You can confuse ships by turning your porch lights on and off at night.
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& c( @% U* {+ | FTOP REASONS TO LIVE IN NEWFOUNDLAND - T, T' w8 S3 i$ h" n( ^
' G$ h. J4 a# R1. If Quebec separates, you will float off to sea.
! q! B, K8 J; ]5 o- W2. If you do something stupid, you have a built-in excuse.
9 X e) x& t' x4 [* l3. The workday is about two hours long.
9 [8 }4 e4 I/ W- I4. It is socially acceptable to wear your hip waders to your wedding |
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