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Tiger s Holiday Poem
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Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house% O! @ |8 ]# r: P7 y% ^
Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse., W% \4 b m* ^
She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,
) w+ a7 x T6 e6 b8 w* f2 {Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.# ]3 g7 Q' P- _" l8 k" q
He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.: f+ [8 Z$ i0 U4 u$ x4 G
Woman after woman stepped up and confessed.
5 u2 t' m/ m+ q4 o/ T8 PHe’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,/ u' Y( O, Q7 _# s& c3 @0 m; ]
With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.5 O! B. U: A. K- O
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
" x- l; ]8 T6 @8 p. r2 v ?$ h5 X! F3 HTiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.
" c6 {$ K) K. L [2 p% `& SWith hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,2 N7 s' w" Q0 x1 u
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.
9 G2 h2 b2 | Z, d. f6 UDespite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',
, O' [4 e$ z8 L0 A$ N# ^Tiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .
- L% g/ P p; ]; A' \And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,' E0 O0 ]! G% ^9 n# n E
"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."
/ w, S) S) R* y9 N" _She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,3 Y) p$ E; u$ @5 g
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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