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Tiger s Holiday Poem7 b' }4 D% R l
6 w$ F) ]: O; A1 ]' mTwas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house
Q7 h& U6 I* K1 z fTiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse.
8 y6 M! v I0 ~4 VShe wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry,( V9 p% ^2 V* t, W
Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry.0 L% z* Y3 w, D# v; {. y! V4 z
He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed.
0 y# ]2 Z9 O1 n% f3 dWoman after woman stepped up and confessed." r0 p: I7 }; o z! e, `8 o: g
He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori,
o& G+ d2 |! iWith Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story.$ z9 s1 [8 @! i$ R* m, u$ ~" I; c
From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues,
$ M0 `" i6 A1 uTiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news.
! p" c' @; S; FWith hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex,4 D+ ^3 W5 l. z) a
When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts.+ ~) P7 H( B' | \
Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin',5 b, N; C0 s* t; n
Tiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden .; O( E( O' V& ]2 ^. M( L3 p" { h
And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade,
2 H& A' P1 E" r+ M8 X; |8 ?"If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid."
}/ m# w- L. {* R: B, p" zShe’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer,7 H) ?" M/ a3 [1 A( ^
Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. |
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