 鲜花( 19)  鸡蛋( 0)
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Hi everybody. So... I'm Irish. I read a report recently that a man reaches his sexual peak at age 18 but I didn't know this... until I was twenty five. So the world will never know what a stud I was. No one took a bite out of this peach when it was ripe.7 @- K) e' \5 m; j9 p# L
) i& q+ A9 P- c8 TI'm not good at sports, but I love parallel parking... because unlike sports, when you are parallel parking, the worse you are, the more people that are rooting for you.: R1 r) U* ^- E1 H4 |" _
3 }8 J1 f, e9 o2 j; Z- ~I'm an immigrant and I used to drive an old car with a lot of bumper stickers that are impossible to peel off. And one of them said, "if you don't speak English, go home!" I didn't notice it for two years.# P0 y6 }7 L2 m) g4 Z
^; g0 v5 d" _) _" [$ b4 a: BI worked really hard to become a U.S. citizen and I have to take these American History lessons where they asked us questions like:
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* h; f+ `# q$ j8 x" W: G; ]"Who's Benjamin Franklin?" o# @+ k. ^" J: u' B( a6 k c% x
6 Q( u. V) v# \0 f3 _ o2 }I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed?8 G8 r7 J# S7 ]4 ~9 L% x
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And the second one was:
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# w+ X1 j1 Q- Y8 V, h4 J"What's the 2nd Amendment?"
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I was like; ahh... The reason our convenience stores get robbed? e' ^: }& l% g' }
1 ~1 z% d7 _, ^" i6 F/ D) Q8 ^"What is Roe vs. Wade?"2 j/ k4 u. I- W" t# T
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I was like ahh... Two ways of coming to the United States?
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8 N% B& e& V+ j$ a) }+ D/ J, tI have a family now, but I used to be scared of marriage. I was like wow... 50 percent of all marriages end up lasting on forever!
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I just had my first child last year. I was really amazed at it. I was in the delivery room, holding up my son, thinking to myself, "Wow... He was just born... And he's already a U.S citizen."
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So I said to him, "DO you even know who is Benjamin Franklin?"% B! k+ W% ]3 D6 H9 M# J
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Now I have a sign in my car that says ”Baby On board.”4 P& V* w8 C$ F
7 e* E" g8 Y/ a2 V) H; f8 J$ aThis sign is basically a threat. It just says that I have a screaming baby and a nagging wife and that I am not afraid of dying anymore.
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2 `9 V- ^' R' T+ K! JThank you very much!
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Implicit explanations to audience with culture difference:
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1. Ben Franklin's picture is on the US $100 bill., u$ @6 r2 h9 l X" c+ t. T: [
+ H; ^# r2 W; \* X3 ]2. Second Amendment refers to the US Constitution for the right to keep and bear arms.
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" `* C' _' l% T"Roe vs. Wade" is a famous court case that you'll learn about in history class that deals with abortion.
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Joe Wong used this case in a form of a question: What is Roe vs. Wade? To which he cleverly delivered the punchline "Two ways of coming to the United States".# [/ ^- P3 j3 O' n. o. C
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Roe is used as a play on words to describe "row", as in using a boat to "row" to the US.
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5 R1 t( ~# f" g/ d2 C( \* sThe denotation of wade was used, the definition meaning "to walk in water". |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2009-5-5 20:01
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发表于 2009-5-5 21:39
