 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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6 Q. p3 {9 _- f( Y- H+ o) \Let's face it
" c% Q `# ?5 `English is a stupid language.4 h0 `2 x, V6 @
There is no egg in the eggplant
" K' B; ~, q+ i; W1 o G. L" ]No ham in the hamburger5 @; q7 ^+ k! w( v( k' W; L9 O& ?
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.) ^$ ~! K) d7 ]+ Z" ~# @$ M
English muffins were not invented in England
/ k, i! S5 i; I: ^2 d) w" V; bFrench fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
. `) z/ Q6 R) q+ `# a1 C2 tBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that3 W" X+ \4 \9 U1 s: l8 d
Quicksand takes you down slowly
[7 p+ x; b& q) K$ L! FBoxing rings are square D7 r4 e" J5 B5 r/ V0 k( _: W, D
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. , G1 ^1 o1 h% `4 D- B* n
( L* u" o% @; v* O" RIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
( D) ~0 A p' B5 I* F) P9 wIf the plural of tooth is teeth. G9 n4 H0 C4 s' S7 X
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth( R6 d# O- Q, j+ ~7 U z
If the teacher taught,2 y* P) }) _ R* }) b6 w, k
Why didn't the preacher praught.# |4 C. ]% D1 J P6 \! N' ~5 Z
1 x; T ]2 a4 J ^If a vegetarian eats vegetables$ L$ `) c4 f, @2 {
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?, k& Z* O5 \/ r# t' P: J
Why do people recite at a play
& [' L6 G) _( ]6 ~$ X2 Q- aYet play at a recital?! L' P) I7 O5 o% x. L
Park on driveways and
) A3 _2 P- A8 F# E- o8 F& L8 pDrive on parkways
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) a: K) t7 a- B: r$ z/ ~You have to marvel at the unique lunacy% k- c- b) h) z, T
Of a language where a house can burn up as
# @ i+ n- R0 D7 j0 L3 \+ S. _! OIt burns down: d6 }: S) b" |) g5 A& o
And in which you fill in a form
; J8 M, x/ |% E6 u$ oBy filling it out
+ W0 x- x# `4 V4 P7 A& E( P8 ZAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers3 p3 B% K: |) @
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
4 Z6 t+ k4 u. U(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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3 \* {7 P) b$ _& S zThat is why: N3 X, r5 B5 D4 J8 B7 h
When the stars are out they are visible T1 `& U3 F. a% z
But when the lights are out they are invisible p. p/ z( P4 @! k
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
" m f& ]; V" P# xIt starts
: ~% e$ G6 U/ R& h7 x4 v; BBut when I wind up this observation,) w$ j. _$ z2 w* U. u) X5 i
It ends. |
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