 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?% P' T) H u% ~1 E5 B* w5 c$ [! L7 M
& r* |9 k, | Z, J2 ~" NLet's face it7 @" j+ E) I( N# \; c! X
English is a stupid language.8 W# U/ ?; j- z3 b
There is no egg in the eggplant
9 ?/ ]4 S: U9 }' t* m! K! w3 ENo ham in the hamburger
! [3 q S. W( L- J8 F2 ]$ ?4 DAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
" Y9 p" _( H0 J+ P* f& l9 jEnglish muffins were not invented in England
: d, a) t% Y# \' ]French fries were not invented in France.
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O' i$ Q/ J( e |We sometimes take English for granted
9 ~! u9 }4 M2 t z5 B0 k6 XBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that4 J: m1 N. I0 ~. |+ ~, [2 c
Quicksand takes you down slowly
5 t' D6 Y, {, p S+ H8 I* s, yBoxing rings are square+ o5 U; o. v- O. s* G4 Z3 j$ l
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. , D# J" n3 x+ z( M- x- K5 z: p$ v
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.7 Y! @$ M9 n- [5 \/ s+ N( y/ m& R
If the plural of tooth is teeth/ ?9 f9 z5 {# K9 `! q! e% M
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth; n+ g* t' e: v7 m! [
If the teacher taught,
* R" E4 n" H% l5 K* _Why didn't the preacher praught.
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( Y# o! j$ ?+ H6 t4 t' kIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
, Z5 p+ m' m9 p5 kWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?$ |% e- r1 i1 V3 I4 O( |
Why do people recite at a play
0 I$ A0 y; T2 c( j3 G1 o* l, xYet play at a recital?
6 V8 q, i: u7 r5 b7 P1 U5 {. v0 KPark on driveways and
% g' P6 F1 b# ]3 NDrive on parkways- j9 a& f9 p3 Z& {+ W: J5 n# ]
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy1 [* x* y+ s. I1 F2 f
Of a language where a house can burn up as: f# b% ^, J) M) g* c
It burns down
# g5 ]5 N0 e+ I( QAnd in which you fill in a form & r! c- ]2 X1 L; A1 H: m
By filling it out3 _. Q: o5 M o- L) f2 A
And a bell is only heard once it goes!$ I6 @9 F$ K( T: s* X; t0 w
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English was invented by people, not computers; ]3 p/ v5 u7 n8 S
And it reflects the creativity of the human race( A5 n6 S+ H4 V$ z+ N% X
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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( E6 H' N7 f. Z+ ~0 }* DThat is why
4 j: l6 w& U# X- t" XWhen the stars are out they are visible3 P3 q2 K# G; ~4 x, p
But when the lights are out they are invisible# R0 u/ t4 W# E" M( ]
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
/ N: _8 W. P5 n/ U2 Y# JIt starts+ V5 J" ^- M B$ }2 J0 D# ~7 o
But when I wind up this observation,9 L9 t9 L _$ S2 s! e- W
It ends. |
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