 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?7 T/ i$ J' h3 j- f# n# H
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Let's face it0 M" L! I- ?0 r% D7 \$ H
English is a stupid language.
4 y; x* U2 y# a. b1 v9 [/ {There is no egg in the eggplant$ g4 g" L, j+ o9 v, A0 t7 K
No ham in the hamburger# D9 ^/ @# T" v/ b0 E
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.7 r1 X8 G# e0 j. i# g
English muffins were not invented in England
/ b" ]8 p) v. Z! gFrench fries were not invented in France.5 F8 q8 z% i6 W, Y7 N$ Z
3 `* P; _' n, a6 ~We sometimes take English for granted
3 S4 ~# u& M0 X/ nBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that2 T' L2 n; W4 }7 h I, `/ y
Quicksand takes you down slowly7 P9 e4 e+ |7 C) ?; B. O
Boxing rings are square
% W/ l- w$ E$ LAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ( Q8 G. b4 l' R
* L4 Z' F. g+ J, d" c3 P& x% @ {If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.: x$ b/ A, l, n' p t4 q! k
If the plural of tooth is teeth
; H7 u3 f1 F5 f' q* r8 wShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth% ^1 r. ?& S$ t s& I: ~9 @5 O
If the teacher taught,$ K6 X5 g7 {6 x3 G7 X
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
k: e" r2 W0 C+ m+ o4 PWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?: M2 z5 F. Z0 Z
Why do people recite at a play
. M* i9 Q7 a; U* p! D4 T$ cYet play at a recital?( B6 T# I+ \" Y& t- e. ^$ J+ i
Park on driveways and% r8 ^5 v2 j/ k9 R( L8 @
Drive on parkways( v# ?$ R6 e* ]/ x" H/ e
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy4 [$ M2 E" e5 C1 H& T
Of a language where a house can burn up as) L8 X5 n2 |1 e$ [* O9 d; _
It burns down
1 b" a/ {; L8 \8 X4 t9 d# [# CAnd in which you fill in a form
( l8 _/ G0 d/ k; g5 y! Y" ?3 @8 EBy filling it out
! G3 v9 C$ {6 x5 D L1 M" ZAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!1 P! p1 w" E7 Q: M: `; v
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English was invented by people, not computers
/ ^7 G) {& q5 f6 O+ o5 y$ J# ]And it reflects the creativity of the human race, T( W7 o" U/ _1 I' L1 m% A( a3 G0 }
(Which of course isn't a race at all). f8 Q+ T4 w! k r* S& M$ ?7 @
. i) q. U% C2 OThat is why2 M* p; \5 h( h4 e4 V! o- U
When the stars are out they are visible
5 g- _8 N9 [ o1 `/ Y% k- e, S2 UBut when the lights are out they are invisible
- B5 J* j) r- {/ V! ^And why it is that when I wind up my watch
' r- u! r0 _% J- {5 QIt starts
, j- S5 J# l& E$ dBut when I wind up this observation,
- } d8 n/ m% WIt ends. |
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