 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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9 }& U6 C9 Z1 YLet's face it+ [+ ^( c: F% S1 k; L
English is a stupid language.- a1 T: d, f* X v
There is no egg in the eggplant
$ R4 B0 ^' B. ^9 ]% } jNo ham in the hamburger
) K. m* h+ G# i8 g! x* u" h/ ?And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple., [1 |7 H) o/ [" ~" A& b
English muffins were not invented in England
; S' ~- N# z% S+ fFrench fries were not invented in France.; Q d4 h4 ]2 x5 x) i7 \! I
$ w8 I4 {; Y3 n- u0 h1 @% C; KWe sometimes take English for granted
3 {0 \. p/ L! e7 GBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that) m0 _6 S6 F0 g
Quicksand takes you down slowly; Z' ?& V1 J& z
Boxing rings are square
" Y: Q g% [; S9 oAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. 8 X, _7 a$ p7 x/ e, q
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
5 k M# k, s; J2 v4 pIf the plural of tooth is teeth) o( `8 m: ]: T( E, p/ [, b+ ~
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth* `0 z" z- t/ n' P ~
If the teacher taught,: Z8 f" t$ l& e/ f, n) Y
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables7 j0 |% N0 z/ w) {2 f) n
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
3 e/ m, X; m$ @% pWhy do people recite at a play
4 r J2 N) x' G" MYet play at a recital?
1 r [# W M3 qPark on driveways and
; P; ]$ h ^- C+ A- EDrive on parkways) a1 S/ r$ r2 T i
2 H% t/ Y. J3 N: |- SYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy7 @8 P. T, a, H& B S+ N a
Of a language where a house can burn up as+ F; X3 H8 A0 O3 \
It burns down
# ]0 {: q! Z& J8 x. ~3 VAnd in which you fill in a form : O1 @8 w& i3 G4 q
By filling it out. H6 r6 S4 b9 [. `7 z. q8 A J4 P
And a bell is only heard once it goes!" x. \3 r5 G3 `/ Q2 t
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English was invented by people, not computers
$ T9 H( m2 P; T% o; |9 G* \" Z4 pAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race/ f* {0 O/ o% Q r y7 O% D
(Which of course isn't a race at all)( o7 Z$ U9 z& \! d* A. i6 J; `
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That is why( k* g6 Z1 O7 ?0 C! c4 ] z) e
When the stars are out they are visible# K1 b" W5 v# o6 m( {* x
But when the lights are out they are invisible
' `4 d, v& |" T+ A- m: y/ |- @5 w' r% CAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch4 V+ E, S$ Z3 E8 I2 d1 x; C
It starts" _ ^! \* I( G' U, l2 q
But when I wind up this observation,
' X# k& Q) ^* z/ j6 V0 a) P5 EIt ends. |
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