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English language

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鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24 | 显示全部楼层 |阅读模式
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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% T1 u$ [$ o+ iLet's face it
! K& s  R8 a! o( J+ a: t: uEnglish is a stupid language.# i+ \0 ~# b3 f6 O
There is no egg in the eggplant# L) K- w4 p5 J& O+ ^' B6 G6 e/ S
No ham in the hamburger% X. d8 F9 b' d' V
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
1 _! m$ O" s& F3 R0 U5 E$ fEnglish muffins were not invented in England8 D3 E$ p$ k; b; p5 [
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted8 `: q. {; r; J1 @5 l' b" D
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
9 \( @& L. v# Q4 F# dQuicksand takes you down slowly' u9 M. }3 [2 }! s/ t" D" H  C& p
Boxing rings are square. v2 b3 ^0 Z9 d( |; r
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.+ P' t" r# q8 D( P: @$ j, c* ?
If the plural of tooth is teeth
1 g3 {* E! t! E$ M. sShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth& \6 ?# `; K) [8 ^# X
If the teacher taught,
' y% G7 \/ b/ {7 }& R2 iWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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/ k, n& t5 v7 \% A6 X$ vIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
: g/ T+ L9 ]/ Y- U1 }What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
* c) v2 r; w1 Z5 U8 pWhy do people recite at a play9 A# Q3 S0 }3 i1 ~- T& O
Yet play at a recital?
0 c3 O/ D* J  _( VPark on driveways and1 D7 w' d. o& w8 X; E
Drive on parkways
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; j/ ?" l; K: ]4 vYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy( Y1 f# J& U4 P+ U1 x" Y/ U# c
Of a language where a house can burn up as
" ^, h5 m, r( Z6 qIt burns down
  d/ m; s- v( _. S7 g& W+ g( j- e. HAnd in which you fill in a form
) l- T: a! ^* ^* P& f+ ]; tBy filling it out
- l8 F4 _- q! ^* q$ Z$ k; U, VAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!8 I1 b6 Q  x( }9 {' V( J, q9 U
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English was invented by people, not computers7 n8 i, N1 v) t1 W+ q" I
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
9 C2 c, Z5 H3 B2 B2 u- `/ [' G(Which of course isn't a race at all)4 l) G; w* e' {% k# x) o4 e" a6 `

( |2 _$ C* h4 x2 J7 W4 d. _4 C! CThat is why
9 r( \! ?) B5 KWhen the stars are out they are visible
' `) b$ C( ?4 M/ I# B1 E2 IBut when the lights are out they are invisible
# ]: e$ x$ s$ E0 Y' rAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch$ \1 M7 {; P0 e' C1 }
It starts
" ?5 }" }$ h: c$ qBut when I wind up this observation,
" j4 I! [, ]* U4 TIt ends.
鲜花(78) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-17 18:40 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(143) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:08 | 显示全部楼层

典型的中国人写出的E文.该文写的非常差

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
- Y5 ~" Q( ?7 f3 C- d/ v# s1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
4 o$ |- T4 ~) x5 w0 x7 z- t" T2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.; F8 l+ H! @1 G# q( v& N
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.; N% y0 U# a3 ]( m# f
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
% I) `' p0 b2 b+ a' X& t+ \其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.
鲜花(143) 鸡蛋(1)
发表于 2008-11-17 21:20 | 显示全部楼层

而且就E文本身而言

老杨团队 追求完美
应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.
鲜花(21) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-11-28 12:24 | 显示全部楼层
鲜花(152) 鸡蛋(1)
 楼主| 发表于 2008-11-28 16:13 | 显示全部楼层
原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
% y& A$ s& \: z3 \+ [' V  ^6 d( j- ^0 |我看了几行,就看不下去了.
; J7 ~$ N. V$ J5 F8 |( {1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.3 ]6 k. g; X+ x4 b' Z0 E
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...
6 Y- a4 f. Y+ D& ?& T$ \$ w

8 k0 A5 a7 b$ }2 i% X谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢?" L9 N3 P! g. O3 {, C' U) \& G
实话讲,这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-11 21:29 | 显示全部楼层
老杨团队,追求完美;客户至上,服务到位!
能写出此文的人,一定是深得英文精髓。幽默,有趣。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-12 18:54 | 显示全部楼层
我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗?如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-20 16:07 | 显示全部楼层
理袁律师事务所
鲜花(0) 鸡蛋(0)
发表于 2008-12-30 05:33 | 显示全部楼层

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说得不错,有收获,顶一下
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! S8 ]+ a( G' g" O9 F, ]  一民工大便不通去医院作检查,医生检查后给此人开了一个药方,民工到取药处一看是一卷手纸,不解,医生说:以后不要再用水泥袋擦屁股了!
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