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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?( d6 p/ N4 x& b! O8 S
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Let's face it; Y0 w. f( x* Z X- y2 D
English is a stupid language.' M; k7 ]. }( Q7 w. N' @- A
There is no egg in the eggplant
* K0 h# e/ d2 T0 `) v/ ^. c0 DNo ham in the hamburger
! }, ?& z5 m: L6 S& \3 z9 ]" v# j) WAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.0 U- I4 Z# \0 J; x* |: N C
English muffins were not invented in England6 {, B8 M& D! T# j' n
French fries were not invented in France.4 N8 X+ X; Z# o; a) c( i
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We sometimes take English for granted
5 N* j: Y' D# L! J, L" s0 L7 UBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that% g3 n$ P6 w! _/ [5 m* T8 e2 _
Quicksand takes you down slowly$ R. D$ L' Y- i- ?4 W5 @
Boxing rings are square
3 g$ b6 A7 h% j# j: iAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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6 S2 r9 v! \, Y* y7 N& c6 a6 A! BIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.$ m: }- Y! I5 g& q* s. m+ I
If the plural of tooth is teeth
! W& F* c. D# _Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth: y1 ~2 a8 g0 G, Q+ L
If the teacher taught,
" ?6 k: {% u gWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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5 q* t' C% T$ x6 aIf a vegetarian eats vegetables% ?- v! d0 E1 n. N; W; t; E
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?* J, Z7 p+ v0 M% e
Why do people recite at a play
( Q2 x/ a% h9 R0 m" [$ {1 iYet play at a recital?% I8 k5 z% s% \3 R; X
Park on driveways and# v. {, |: q4 d
Drive on parkways
% |6 E: n; i, E: r2 R' ~9 J5 E% x5 t) C7 W2 t" ?
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy! _! k2 G5 E/ i, z& _# |+ c
Of a language where a house can burn up as+ F: P$ F7 `- ^' Z& G( B$ x
It burns down
1 [7 |0 e0 c0 q9 M( `9 N6 rAnd in which you fill in a form - C8 h6 s. D+ |; `; |
By filling it out
0 ^5 ?) e: {7 N& O4 ~# E5 yAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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/ ]) \6 r' U; y& k4 L- H) eEnglish was invented by people, not computers
+ O! r. T$ l! p- FAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
. f" U% E$ |/ h. O(Which of course isn't a race at all): B9 }6 L9 M' }" N) B
8 G: c6 ^6 y4 R, sThat is why
" P1 f ?, x6 ]8 g, s% s2 J; k5 ~When the stars are out they are visible
m, k6 K) Q; qBut when the lights are out they are invisible( A2 a6 ]+ N+ y8 [0 x5 G: l1 n
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
5 Y6 [& v; ]% F D) `It starts$ b3 n, Q \3 t
But when I wind up this observation,
3 S& s6 O) Q8 x7 G& Q$ ZIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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