 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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7 s4 F3 s' x9 X( x5 t$ P4 ELet's face it, N' K1 H- T# A8 G1 g1 K! H
English is a stupid language.6 r* A4 ?4 _% u5 \3 ]7 K
There is no egg in the eggplant* k3 K6 y+ d* c
No ham in the hamburger$ q# F# g% S/ W1 R9 I/ @1 e& w- ]
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.9 a# \3 p0 \# E, G' |3 c
English muffins were not invented in England- |' e, t( u; @" ]" @
French fries were not invented in France.
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( y* `+ y0 M# ] cWe sometimes take English for granted' k" I/ t' v& V5 T( c. h; c5 v
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that# S. ?: U/ b$ H8 Y9 L# O9 i
Quicksand takes you down slowly
' m; F, v$ h" v* B* E1 V4 PBoxing rings are square& ^- d2 ]% ]7 @( m3 Z
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ' [+ g/ C4 Q( C- S/ W1 u9 x
& E" H: d q) j2 XIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
9 h* M* u# d7 w1 ]' O9 OIf the plural of tooth is teeth
6 Y( W4 l4 v f+ _Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
2 A/ }2 S, k5 S7 A$ e1 I/ ^If the teacher taught,3 ?; }1 Y% f' X
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
& v+ a! W6 t! x7 BWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
F! h+ {( z+ ^+ T. J, ^6 z VWhy do people recite at a play
9 t$ J* X! Z& K) cYet play at a recital?
: G% S- U. c, V8 m* A- p; E2 f) WPark on driveways and! v( i! { e9 a) p
Drive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy2 |7 P% _4 k& c" K9 I# P
Of a language where a house can burn up as. {6 B1 x2 H9 I! f, i
It burns down
. E: Y6 {8 Y& o% c- j, G% J0 \And in which you fill in a form # h! h( ]- F+ P7 W4 f
By filling it out5 z' E9 G3 k. C6 m/ a. b! h
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers7 a+ m0 H# L! j1 G/ ~& T
And it reflects the creativity of the human race7 s' }' k' O& {+ |, l" E. @
(Which of course isn't a race at all)2 L* s9 [$ f1 e7 t1 @" O
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That is why, q k, T5 ~3 ]; M$ w- t$ u0 J; Y
When the stars are out they are visible
7 V+ H& s: F4 ABut when the lights are out they are invisible3 p; @ J. q2 x' T x+ V1 V5 f
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
* m7 C8 s! m+ x3 r1 CIt starts
3 h% O+ p7 H1 p/ T. W8 n: UBut when I wind up this observation,
+ C+ A0 p n! q$ {* u6 W, V# YIt ends. |
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