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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?, n. k* [) ? z0 y! S7 c _
; H2 |* _6 j; h2 w# b2 F& GLet's face it, N9 I r; x7 H$ q+ ]. j, ?
English is a stupid language.- [8 s, M/ U& ~6 \
There is no egg in the eggplant8 K; Y: F# V9 T6 c/ L. z
No ham in the hamburger( l9 f, |2 V/ b J. F G' q
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.* `% K5 E# @' u; p6 u1 K% }8 I; a
English muffins were not invented in England
0 X4 t% g/ E5 a, I- dFrench fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
. J& @5 g( E: ]0 i- }& CBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
- K1 Y3 M( n8 F: \% O9 e& n8 FQuicksand takes you down slowly
* l) w# b/ C# j7 N4 aBoxing rings are square" S8 \, p: C9 S+ C
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
( e5 |% H$ j! e8 g; ]9 gIf the plural of tooth is teeth
. c9 |7 ^* y3 G) i; ^! X: nShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth/ o$ B$ [/ C3 F8 {# N$ |1 q1 G
If the teacher taught,8 Z6 s& J3 z0 k) x8 @
Why didn't the preacher praught. U' H0 r' w0 [
1 x1 `+ D! A; n. I' ]; h2 l( q! {If a vegetarian eats vegetables
1 j2 Q' H7 [. k% `' {/ \6 `1 tWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?: n) }, f0 x+ O
Why do people recite at a play% G7 {7 J% v, U" y `
Yet play at a recital?
" A% L8 p* a# u$ XPark on driveways and
# R I6 j+ u2 \2 g# j$ `- c2 gDrive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy) a; N2 f% D+ @% j0 C8 l- z
Of a language where a house can burn up as
8 {% [, h1 I, j* X5 oIt burns down( h# b% u8 {. Z% x8 i
And in which you fill in a form
' b& \6 `! Z* QBy filling it out0 D) K" Y% S( F7 |4 i* j
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers3 q5 `' F, z4 x! N
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
5 a. x" ~! |3 y; U/ ~ Q; p(Which of course isn't a race at all)5 S: w# R1 R- K1 G& G: c- B. R
& V4 @: l3 v$ B# m" BThat is why0 b* s1 c4 \& S! W% ^* X: B9 P
When the stars are out they are visible" X; c2 u% q) T5 M; u- m. K
But when the lights are out they are invisible
& g# G: i) s1 H _( }# Y; EAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
: V/ J7 z4 Z% C- z3 `8 ^& ^It starts
& D; i* H# Q0 o8 A* z# C1 K9 e* wBut when I wind up this observation,
, F* S0 n( x/ n- b. e% ?It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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