English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
& }% A! u7 d, m2 ~) p  C
Let's face it
/ T; z% W7 O0 Y0 B# _. p/ LEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
" f6 N* V/ K* i& bEnglish muffins were not invented in England
1 f* i  K8 i1 B# u0 bFrench fries were not invented in France.
$ N8 N% G" g; ]% H) W
5 a  _6 o1 l/ g. r* x' @% EWe sometimes take English for granted
, R; o; E' l" t4 [6 aBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
5 S* m8 k2 _0 i5 Q" @% \' `: QQuicksand takes you down slowly
% Q7 i1 i5 z9 ~; K  r! e0 j% XBoxing rings are square
% M- h( o# w  cAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
# `0 ^# w# D! H
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
% s4 e' @8 w- u8 S0 `Why didn't the preacher praught.
& q4 V! H2 A3 w2 F
+ |$ R$ G0 i3 V$ v2 c4 _If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
. T7 {2 v+ p" q8 m* uYet play at a recital?
( w8 y! d! O0 ?8 G4 uPark on driveways and
% j. r# x0 D; M. B: N/ q/ EDrive on parkways
- d+ x& y1 [. ~! n8 B' I
) y$ M- `2 |" B% K$ H  Q2 D9 ?; e6 rYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
6 }0 `& s; C( wIt burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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! Q' |3 q4 l/ _, k8 a: mEnglish was invented by people, not computers
$ g0 z$ t: j# v& z' N3 gAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
1 Y8 ^2 A8 o$ g7 X6 o(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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2 d+ I' t  n. ]% pThat is why
When the stars are out they are visible
# y$ K! C+ H/ V& kBut when the lights are out they are invisible
5 z9 ~* J" O( aAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
2 i: [; h, r) z8 w8 t$ QIt starts
8 V; ?: q% I8 H' V. HBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
: F! E) w* ?4 d$ D1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
, a! j" L3 r/ o( F; |7 ~. [我看了几行,就看不下去了.
' x- F1 |6 q) I7 F8 }, n( d- \1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

  e( g* {; p5 V( F谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
" G; e8 h1 ]; a! X& t8 `" ^实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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