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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
% p! P+ Z, V8 {( wEnglish is a stupid language.
% r1 j9 F( y, E' dThere is no egg in the eggplant- \9 N& r/ \9 P6 W5 C8 r* Q( I; }
No ham in the hamburger
3 x! p4 y( r8 xAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.$ D, |+ i L( s2 J
English muffins were not invented in England, E" [; J' J& H- Y6 s& Y
French fries were not invented in France.0 `. D6 v3 g! q2 P5 j$ @
% R3 x; S" z; O% [& z& A6 iWe sometimes take English for granted: d9 F; W, r/ R9 d8 m# p8 V
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that/ d+ s% d C5 |* ]
Quicksand takes you down slowly7 h& \- h. q: O
Boxing rings are square
# H- F' v* d8 r" `And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.8 k% `: S; p4 d. J# P
If the plural of tooth is teeth
1 V# G* h0 t. M, [# kShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
+ X: Z3 z* [1 N% E4 L9 ^If the teacher taught,4 A2 M* c1 M' S! E8 `
Why didn't the preacher praught.2 [ v2 h3 p! S3 n+ u" C4 v
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
6 I! Y5 c. z% p# B* LWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
8 I* Y$ i6 M% J5 K9 a. g8 }# o# ]Why do people recite at a play
( ?- R& j' Y! E. o0 RYet play at a recital?
# f+ L# c& \; ]4 O+ u8 kPark on driveways and
7 x0 V$ c5 F" g9 F7 q' t" KDrive on parkways
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" W" w. g( `, z2 |, Q; DYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
) g! q" q% V$ o% T- W3 X! L! F* TOf a language where a house can burn up as
( W* f7 H7 Y/ w3 s t* j; EIt burns down
& g' N7 K) ^4 a$ [+ Y* E7 [And in which you fill in a form
+ ]4 V! O7 w$ k* }- e/ S" z* {By filling it out' ~7 f$ X( c0 r& t4 s3 p
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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& R7 {: B- c9 \9 J+ @$ {( IEnglish was invented by people, not computers
+ S. \( @# a& s- J0 l* r: GAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
- S& J+ L. v$ u% D(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why
! W0 [) j: i! S8 \When the stars are out they are visible6 f( d+ g9 l$ { k
But when the lights are out they are invisible- T2 j4 w$ [2 W
And why it is that when I wind up my watch; _! G6 y9 l# g/ I0 c* A4 t
It starts
% o) I( ?3 D, Q' QBut when I wind up this observation,
9 Q4 O/ Y. W" }It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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