 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?" ^$ V- X" a+ }/ a$ H" J
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Let's face it6 d' j% E" x! s3 C% o4 [- C
English is a stupid language.7 R! t" a0 ^4 e# t7 e
There is no egg in the eggplant
- f* B5 }; J9 t$ fNo ham in the hamburger
! j9 V5 q: f/ D+ _: zAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
/ B9 A) ]$ c( X$ k, u) C, JEnglish muffins were not invented in England
$ c, O/ B( Z7 X+ {- M' t9 lFrench fries were not invented in France.) C1 ^3 G6 J+ y# q0 y' f6 \
) G O; b- A! c! {& XWe sometimes take English for granted
5 q4 T; [& l; h9 r; f9 Y1 o8 hBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
9 P% n- ^# L9 u) a. ]- XQuicksand takes you down slowly
; R* M. @5 \" E8 f# \! d. {# dBoxing rings are square) v6 `+ j% r0 F* I( |8 N; G
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing./ W7 w6 V0 j( x) f% O; Z. T5 G$ ~
If the plural of tooth is teeth
" Q j u# p# h" s% u nShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth+ `4 l; Q0 r) R7 k1 J9 ` C! v
If the teacher taught,, ]1 R) l! f: |* y* ]4 E; y6 @
Why didn't the preacher praught.; k, U( l8 d k/ E, ?" f F1 R
3 x; ^! r+ }* b3 Y7 KIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
. Q/ E u0 s8 T! z4 iWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
1 x. I: B, t0 v7 t, BWhy do people recite at a play
6 B! o& N6 C+ t$ mYet play at a recital?1 L) \7 r2 D& _; H# @
Park on driveways and" l: r) x1 V! t! d6 P1 X
Drive on parkways2 z4 V# |" K3 \! d) M/ `2 v+ _
" Z2 b/ w( }. ]9 e" Y1 K" g* ^- BYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
1 |) [. ~' ]: w2 T, Y5 l0 vOf a language where a house can burn up as+ Z7 u* G* v1 P8 P
It burns down
: T$ s2 p+ m: e- p7 LAnd in which you fill in a form l% n' Q4 h% c
By filling it out
) ?+ a" w$ m$ i, F6 g9 N3 Z6 GAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
! z; ^" ^6 |! i3 RAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
/ @: V. M+ z) F% M, L" H; W(Which of course isn't a race at all)2 ^6 {) A3 R) E* g. ]2 U# W; r/ R
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That is why
+ E. P) a9 E8 |( W7 m; Y. FWhen the stars are out they are visible
3 j/ [7 F g( K8 C6 Z; T) L$ hBut when the lights are out they are invisible
9 t, `$ u: O% Y( ?- Z% e3 D" M- AAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch8 t: @# \) n. ]' ~4 w2 G- T
It starts
6 S4 W, B8 W3 D/ lBut when I wind up this observation,) f" x9 W. c' q* A1 i
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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