English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
7 ?: C# z- @( U" s' O$ \- z
Let's face it
* H( q) a- L5 ~) TEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
) J$ x* N6 l! _+ h5 k. q( g, X* F4 q6 uAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
% i& L8 s! w1 D5 HFrench fries were not invented in France.
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2 W9 `! ~7 {" ]& Z0 j1 p/ [We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
8 ?, m4 i4 d+ e# U: v2 u- GQuicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
$ J. j. E: U) o1 i2 y9 C" A$ k/ N8 x  TAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
) `" h" _) D5 D1 e3 qWhy didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
8 j2 v2 t* m7 ~  D# O/ R8 jDrive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
' c/ C! Z2 o( K7 Z  w  U- wOf a language where a house can burn up as
9 ^6 R& h  p" J# a. c9 H' Q0 UIt burns down
And in which you fill in a form
2 {; T, a+ p; e$ `! @3 C& Z7 {By filling it out
# ^3 ~% B6 C) W0 @( R- C7 Z' p  j8 EAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
2 y4 R: g$ v! n4 U9 w3 B
English was invented by people, not computers
- ?$ s+ [* E, NAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
/ J6 \* s! d( w/ |It starts
9 b: r: I: d: R6 XBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
7 Z9 ]9 o5 B5 q- {6 u1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
9 p8 b4 L8 J! s! c" q, x" N  ]2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
) v7 C1 ~- V9 f3 V# Y; K" o: n4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
6 x- l& N: B" B9 j7 w其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
1 w' o, Q+ I5 R* D实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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