English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

. D9 D& b) U- E" R3 D- k6 t( u; L# ?Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
4 m8 x1 B5 V5 b5 x1 aThere is no egg in the eggplant
; q3 a. y, {' ~/ V& B4 @# i/ ]( SNo ham in the hamburger
' }/ c! G" d4 {$ J$ CAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
0 _& ^! D. Z1 bFrench fries were not invented in France.
. [. Z. m% P( N2 f
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
4 C5 b) r. H4 W- K4 WQuicksand takes you down slowly
' @& N3 s. r" G8 [6 uBoxing rings are square
7 C' {* J' t: o! `% B, }6 W* MAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
5 i4 w6 u, l9 ^+ L" }: c2 W- [
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
- B. g$ M7 a" H+ `+ I& H4 d: f3 G' ~8 @If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
& @: y0 p& M& |" h0 S" a5 rIf the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

* X7 g0 _5 @+ ]If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
/ s& s3 W5 l- b9 S+ ePark on driveways and
2 E6 E" {/ H* W) s$ cDrive on parkways
( r" d9 V0 Z' Q3 {9 E# U$ m
% v6 r. q  Q% S& W3 `7 LYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
4 z7 q/ ^/ ^7 G( \Of a language where a house can burn up as
1 y# `2 o- x$ B* W, GIt burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
- O- ~2 x# f( T1 X* g* {6 x% w+ ^And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
) Z" O' [3 x  g9 }(Which of course isn't a race at all)

That is why
5 F5 `+ P! W8 u8 ^0 O7 ?+ AWhen the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
7 [/ m3 X+ U  g; b; \But when I wind up this observation,
& z9 Q0 f! j  ~! E( x7 o+ |$ dIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
- i5 r. k0 i, X7 A8 n/ `2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

& d: o0 _8 c, ?( v
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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说得不错，有收获，顶一下
- x1 i# b2 }* K( q. H

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