English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
* V' J% Z$ S/ v! WEnglish is a stupid language.
. F3 g0 Y  W; ]; E- r, q1 jThere is no egg in the eggplant
( k/ U$ ?7 }! t' F$ t( i6 iNo ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
0 |1 x7 m! E$ W7 t' Q9 q# kFrench fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
5 [3 ]3 i3 a0 s( U; B# S; VQuicksand takes you down slowly
6 r- ?6 v9 I7 _! v+ g3 G) u9 f0 gBoxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

% Y. r& S3 b: `- X9 lIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
1 O$ [; E6 Y' _5 P0 Y0 _If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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1 F  \' j: l  t8 sIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
. w4 L! s  |% d, w- Z" V9 c$ EWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
, F2 K9 p$ k6 T% ]0 P0 ZWhy do people recite at a play
( Z0 \1 G- V. x' B5 lYet play at a recital?
( O; q) k; `4 f' CPark on driveways and
" ^5 m; ~+ ?1 U; Z& e3 PDrive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
8 D$ X6 v+ K* S. `Of a language where a house can burn up as
! }) B0 x5 u+ }It burns down
% u9 I: w/ `1 L! i; ^6 V- q" ]; wAnd in which you fill in a form
2 e3 s9 A0 n2 s" r  Q" jBy filling it out
7 x; \! y9 Z( U* R2 bAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
- x# C; [8 Y. y% T% e- e' J5 e# OAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why
' q. c/ M9 j' k0 R3 C1 v% LWhen the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
/ y# q0 o3 |8 t+ q" _) t" `( v$ wAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
& g. q9 ~% G+ j- v. `It starts
% W0 A1 _6 K- A3 P/ O; q: V9 xBut when I wind up this observation,
/ q3 Y' a7 f6 BIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
( F: l. {# \/ ?# @) S( l$ T1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
7 F5 U+ R. ?7 Y5 I+ F$ a2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
5 F, ~! C0 r6 S1 a7 ~3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
. v8 e7 f! o; o; ^其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
( c- i  V4 f3 ?( G' G2 B我看了几行,就看不下去了.
8 ]1 w( e$ `. Y5 ]; ?) W- v$ h1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
% l+ a7 T# E- C4 E- J2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

9 R; L6 ]& m3 ?$ h7 i0 F
  y) E6 U9 x- `) l' R# |1 P5 r谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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( f; Q2 n+ m+ @& _
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