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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it
( u9 [1 Q$ i, I( N* |; Z) eEnglish is a stupid language.7 u7 R" i+ e* X3 E; t
There is no egg in the eggplant
- R: Y% w+ z# n' XNo ham in the hamburger
& V- m: [ s5 e9 [) J0 GAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.- c" w7 @+ v: B9 @* a7 Q3 e
English muffins were not invented in England
$ J' e3 l ]( |6 KFrench fries were not invented in France.$ Z- y3 c' U$ D$ T
5 K0 c, l$ R% tWe sometimes take English for granted
$ k9 \, A% H+ a2 MBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
7 \8 ]: @& N7 d1 }7 d9 x& RQuicksand takes you down slowly& t: x* d$ Z; w" S* N' k; X4 Y
Boxing rings are square2 \3 H7 ]6 g4 t& T n/ R, h
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.: i+ C' a% m. r% R/ J" p3 g
If the plural of tooth is teeth* P5 X/ o z! P( Z4 ^; v
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
+ U+ `7 m: C0 h* b# H: KIf the teacher taught,! f0 H7 T5 _5 q' }1 k1 }# l
Why didn't the preacher praught.5 U* u) t& V, D$ Z
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
; X2 I& E; ?4 L2 x7 R0 F7 `What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
# L+ e q5 _# H0 ^8 Y: xWhy do people recite at a play
3 s! N$ u# Q2 |" r8 [* |0 ]Yet play at a recital?$ W8 n/ Q; ~( p+ r) l' V
Park on driveways and
5 i# B" ?: g, j. U( c. oDrive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
* N; K0 n! U5 g( u: WOf a language where a house can burn up as8 [. I7 a: q+ u& Q
It burns down
, J- P9 Q8 V( N$ e$ x0 Z% ?4 nAnd in which you fill in a form
+ @ S' E+ `) L! ABy filling it out
, O0 z4 H. Y" f' vAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers, g, A: T! a6 O+ Q
And it reflects the creativity of the human race# Y a1 c7 \9 V% }, r2 a
(Which of course isn't a race at all); K& q$ U7 C* r7 n7 `( m
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That is why. }5 f& I5 y/ W0 \$ M3 B! E
When the stars are out they are visible
o$ c5 g) k# B- D8 h' |/ O' |But when the lights are out they are invisible
! L. S. S* E3 I3 a! N( nAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
4 C$ l5 Y. ]! D+ P" f, O/ aIt starts0 }6 B' c) U: b8 D
But when I wind up this observation,
' X# n( M j' h: \It ends. |
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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