 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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5 ^" r, r9 Y' M. sLet's face it
( X5 F) T, D6 ZEnglish is a stupid language.
' B4 f% }" Q2 p; [' AThere is no egg in the eggplant
4 L9 X0 E9 o v, ZNo ham in the hamburger7 s3 C" D# T0 @2 ~6 ?- w
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple., G8 _: @$ E1 P
English muffins were not invented in England" i! R8 Z8 }8 X$ {' \2 V0 x
French fries were not invented in France./ r5 ~9 h- k" a# `- n" D% |+ u5 p
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We sometimes take English for granted
^9 F+ c* D+ b0 M) }But if we examine its paradoxes we find that( [3 `' E2 s. g f: ?2 ?6 T
Quicksand takes you down slowly
9 s% ?# Z7 ?) \, Y6 GBoxing rings are square3 L! } _) D2 T9 X: \
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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6 I/ }6 [+ J: e9 z+ v XIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
3 q- s% _7 m( [3 eIf the plural of tooth is teeth
8 D1 [* I1 f. M4 J# K+ m, UShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth' Z. z* p4 b" h, r
If the teacher taught,5 _! Q. V% s6 u: k% Z, {' W
Why didn't the preacher praught.) j/ Y9 G" v: o3 s3 J
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables# b+ j: J& D0 Y) }! B' m6 }
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
8 x W* @+ ~8 J9 Z8 i! T. JWhy do people recite at a play- e8 }! t8 T4 m9 L
Yet play at a recital?& G7 d% x7 p+ {5 S. I! |9 o
Park on driveways and* H+ D; o" u* x% j) q. j0 K# p8 z
Drive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy" c |7 b+ B; Y( n5 t
Of a language where a house can burn up as) n$ v( f6 D5 Y8 o
It burns down( d& T1 Z3 J3 @7 z5 ?
And in which you fill in a form / R4 `' U2 s$ g4 W
By filling it out
- c: n% m( b2 e8 R& vAnd a bell is only heard once it goes! t8 S2 D4 k1 h, A& E$ n
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English was invented by people, not computers
- w) l$ Y i0 X. SAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race: Z: K8 E$ {1 l( O% O+ S
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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5 _+ M6 p& `2 w4 h5 s7 e/ qThat is why
1 L( O1 Z7 N% d* s! k* x/ AWhen the stars are out they are visible
/ C0 L0 v8 u& p1 k1 x/ SBut when the lights are out they are invisible4 K' T: }4 V9 I. D% A
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
* m* r4 Y/ w X& {9 {. b) LIt starts+ B7 X% I3 R' k& n9 H
But when I wind up this observation,8 y* R4 v) T! V: o- G1 p+ L s
It ends. |
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