 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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! d% E8 \" N" w& K, C2 wLet's face it
. W4 R8 R1 S" L KEnglish is a stupid language.' A* n8 S: O( i# t( A- |
There is no egg in the eggplant
6 t, ^# l6 I/ \* _" ] |, ~No ham in the hamburger
; o0 W5 A9 m. l5 wAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
5 V# _& c+ G8 }English muffins were not invented in England% @9 Q9 F' h4 K) [# }* Q
French fries were not invented in France.* D' t( T3 ?- v# b" x0 M, N, G1 K3 y
% m$ z9 i1 P0 m* |$ p" T* LWe sometimes take English for granted
( ?6 ?# i7 @1 m2 YBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that/ C! R: l8 R% i: a
Quicksand takes you down slowly( @ ^. Q' o: A! u" m
Boxing rings are square
j5 r! x8 b T- lAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.# p W; v7 W, a5 F' h9 W
If the plural of tooth is teeth
* I( m' \- t3 c5 o8 Y# H4 B' `Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth. y8 R1 V6 H3 \
If the teacher taught,
& O p+ t9 d: {: T. h! X) eWhy didn't the preacher praught.! E- ^$ o/ F" n# P3 M0 K
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables1 v b6 P' a& I$ O3 P9 s+ Z
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?$ @; c9 y9 y% L# X- L) f) X
Why do people recite at a play3 E7 ~% z n4 ~
Yet play at a recital?
9 W4 o" e/ E2 e" bPark on driveways and
- Y' v9 P/ r! e* N$ XDrive on parkways' ]/ Q8 |& S! h2 T6 R% `- |! c
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
& t) o: f- B+ E# j+ nOf a language where a house can burn up as1 g8 G7 B) B' I: P. n
It burns down
: ~/ ^- l8 q: Z' ], DAnd in which you fill in a form t) u+ g' B. x4 V v1 h K! {
By filling it out
8 R% C8 V }- t$ |0 J; fAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!5 T* W& x" c5 T8 o: s3 P
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English was invented by people, not computers
. ~8 F1 F+ v8 T# u3 S/ n! H+ VAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
. \$ [ p; o6 J0 K% F ](Which of course isn't a race at all)* q6 ~2 r2 o; G+ _# H; s
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That is why
4 |# A7 N# ^+ {5 eWhen the stars are out they are visible
8 `2 l5 @6 X }! v& ?" T& S, lBut when the lights are out they are invisible1 I, ?/ U& ^. U) M% V ]- f
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
! L3 e! p7 q* c) h6 PIt starts5 ` A' ?, H$ b2 I
But when I wind up this observation,
, s' @3 {3 a- n- E; g) _5 e, m0 zIt ends. |
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