English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

! h# E# h/ e* i. ^7 o4 mLet's face it
English is a stupid language.
/ [! ?8 _9 A8 O/ C; q+ c( lThere is no egg in the eggplant
4 o! p: h" J: ^; S# z( _No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
4 O  E$ x" S$ B$ ]5 XFrench fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
. V( n9 d2 h9 A7 N7 J3 BBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
0 g( O  N/ H& J/ VBoxing rings are square
* `) h9 \. e3 E9 J0 H+ U5 [& h0 SAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
* a3 d' s+ v6 B- I" L# P& B
0 W% h( V9 Q5 \4 `" F* r; M+ u( Q& fIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
: q* V1 H$ n  p8 mIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
# |+ ]. T- j+ ^1 V9 QIf the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
  t+ A# [  W2 oWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
4 l+ E- T% P: N6 f0 O5 I5 W( [Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
4 _. M' j8 q# M5 f& Q, J
! P- X8 M* P# W) g5 @0 t% }You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
3 k0 w6 F3 a2 p* `6 Z; g' [' hBy filling it out
+ m. N# _5 [1 \6 ^8 k" t8 I' MAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
1 w2 k& i4 k  r, n- a4 L
; m! P; z/ b* u! ^  yEnglish was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
' [) A- w; y$ N5 F2 J2 \, `6 x; W
. B  G; M* N* o2 j" bThat is why
1 |' C8 D3 d% p& F2 P' NWhen the stars are out they are visible
  a0 S9 v- w) h5 ^$ h; Y: H* ABut when the lights are out they are invisible
+ Z& h9 e2 w$ A$ ]) Y. k' x4 z$ lAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
: o  {* Z! G: r8 T6 E" IBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
; J' B& e2 q  _1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
+ _" e& F# I" U% B0 s2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
" g3 a0 W- E) H0 w9 T1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

( e7 |' n: }4 u# ^
谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

免费杀毒软件下载酷我音乐盒wps金山毒霸2009下载免费金山毒霸~！!~！!！!！!

沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下

( K) O; U* g7 E/ Q! {6 q
  一民工大便不通去医院作检查，医生检查后给此人开了一个药方，民工到取药处一看是一卷手纸，不解，医生说：以后不要再用水泥袋擦屁股了！


-------------------------
; H2 d4 Q$ Q# k# @$ O; ]6 _' M! Pa 传奇世界私服, b WoW Gold, c 传奇私服, d 传世私服, e wow gold