 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
|
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?4 \9 q$ e5 M& Y! o) P, X
i6 D: L/ p/ F8 \ cLet's face it
4 s# R/ d. R% w0 V/ tEnglish is a stupid language.# `& E7 L' u6 ]# L) R
There is no egg in the eggplant9 t s c- m7 I; ?. Z7 j
No ham in the hamburger
/ c6 \2 H& a, @% q0 o2 y$ aAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.& A% Q- @+ d. G* U+ v) w+ U% a, E0 p
English muffins were not invented in England5 X6 O0 a0 p; U; x& Z
French fries were not invented in France.! U2 y# l' G( g- Y m9 l- S3 X. S
1 B( V5 x( ~5 c( Z; R
We sometimes take English for granted
* g% ?4 q, |. XBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that' ]- z& q, J) H5 _6 c: K
Quicksand takes you down slowly
+ X& ^( z6 ]6 W t- @3 C9 e% \Boxing rings are square
5 C ^: C4 I( X+ t4 e/ M8 LAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
; e6 O3 O) I. }/ j
5 b( C1 f2 a8 Z; `' X, B, SIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.$ T9 k% F- W5 u8 V0 K; n
If the plural of tooth is teeth) F, {8 x" T. [7 g# H2 b8 J5 _
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth0 P8 L& h$ Q% X1 T# T
If the teacher taught,$ t. d8 O' @& a# Z* m1 p% g
Why didn't the preacher praught.
0 Y! E, K& g; q/ t0 i/ ^7 A) r6 f" E& E8 G. N
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
" p8 i6 r* f$ N4 ?+ r' b; LWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?/ \1 z, K3 j5 ^
Why do people recite at a play
; c( ^5 P, }% @$ S7 b3 d5 }Yet play at a recital?3 R9 K" @5 G2 G
Park on driveways and
7 ^# d$ D$ J& }2 V2 _( xDrive on parkways7 g" l3 F Z5 a7 H0 @- B F
4 R7 }* L6 |, H; E1 ]
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
9 j1 e1 I% q. s3 K# HOf a language where a house can burn up as
" p/ ^* }% T7 G4 O/ C+ [6 d1 eIt burns down
3 ? L2 e" A# [And in which you fill in a form 8 w; I5 M6 b3 L. K" t- Q C6 B7 n C) W
By filling it out, m5 {, M1 z! r. p+ m( E( w
And a bell is only heard once it goes!8 ?1 q( R6 U9 l# X# S3 |
: l0 Q. y% D9 R% |* P9 [; m1 c
English was invented by people, not computers
- E* r: w4 L+ iAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
; H/ c4 N4 m' t(Which of course isn't a race at all)8 U! E3 A( [; r5 g
/ P' b2 ~0 i( a3 Y5 UThat is why$ D- ?4 c. n$ q5 w, f V
When the stars are out they are visible
; w8 U& w9 X+ _# e, R) hBut when the lights are out they are invisible0 j: n$ X2 u2 }! F `2 H
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
3 r+ a0 [# J: F* @' qIt starts
! E$ J8 x+ O! ^) cBut when I wind up this observation,& R0 W# i5 B9 t: N- i
It ends. |
|