 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it) ~( }3 U0 [6 a" ^2 T6 I; E9 E
English is a stupid language.* Q, [" \5 @1 j2 _5 j# S
There is no egg in the eggplant
% t* V( N0 k; `: ^& Z @, k2 |; ONo ham in the hamburger6 K% M6 ]+ Q1 ^
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple., O- u1 w) i" r' b, u
English muffins were not invented in England( y1 e* O! L5 }. D: l! l( g
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted( l* B$ T4 F7 K' D2 Y- w! ^
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that. R; K3 ]1 d7 \; y2 t( \
Quicksand takes you down slowly
5 W( _ k) U/ t R4 v2 zBoxing rings are square
: {9 f) R7 X e; G7 I. ?! C6 R7 s iAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. / h" ?+ \$ r) Z3 c9 j G% |; b! w
7 a* Y) E8 k+ i6 }. w. K" C4 EIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.' {2 y" l' r' L( a6 f9 U
If the plural of tooth is teeth6 Y/ d0 W& k# o- @2 W; J5 h
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth$ s: c& q( ?* K5 P! Q; Y
If the teacher taught,; e) {. I) I2 ?2 ]4 D5 ^* o
Why didn't the preacher praught.: d% {" x# ?! \! q8 o. R! V
( E5 a9 w5 J) k" S! E8 iIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
# A8 y1 \2 \# u) O; K. H& O) e, WWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?$ @# X8 B2 @* H* V9 n9 f, c
Why do people recite at a play" I- N; i# p' U- t A; Q% v
Yet play at a recital?
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Drive on parkways" ?, z3 _6 _( y! ~5 q
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy4 L* R1 H5 k1 Q% K# X2 ^# d) a
Of a language where a house can burn up as' [! u% b6 [* M" W
It burns down
7 c5 Q6 b. S, t" x A& dAnd in which you fill in a form - Y& I) s4 s# \% q4 w( Y
By filling it out- n9 ?/ S7 x& A9 Y3 G% Q2 i, F! F
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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* B# x% r3 F: q) ~ XEnglish was invented by people, not computers
: y- n) L1 g `2 \; JAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
" S9 z% `& d9 U- \% u' F(Which of course isn't a race at all)4 }7 i; Q9 [! ]5 [, R4 \
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That is why% e6 j* u- \# c; C8 s
When the stars are out they are visible: y. ]: y$ Q! [; @5 s
But when the lights are out they are invisible' T! @ G, S3 i# r
And why it is that when I wind up my watch2 C" v, m0 o3 V1 w1 y( ]
It starts
7 C( ^ l( L# w3 S4 V$ J) q) f0 O3 ~But when I wind up this observation,
- p: i) l8 ~. ~8 l& OIt ends. |
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