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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?9 H, W2 w3 I. S& G* d9 p# e W
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Let's face it6 D) ]1 t) c+ m3 _, Z
English is a stupid language.
- m- w$ K( ]8 F' lThere is no egg in the eggplant
( q7 H, u8 h+ H9 p% B2 ^7 x' e9 TNo ham in the hamburger$ F+ t% T+ X! ~0 k% C; n+ U
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
6 N8 _9 d2 S# P+ V. N- u# ZEnglish muffins were not invented in England- }: Y4 A$ \) p; R
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
7 ?* }* e6 e3 T6 HBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that+ x& _: k4 g' H$ @. B, u
Quicksand takes you down slowly6 T" ^# H5 a% b& F2 K, J
Boxing rings are square, M) ^" c! f% |4 n: m0 _0 G
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
7 p. V; `$ y9 n6 v( WIf the plural of tooth is teeth. q6 _; { X2 M- f# ?- f. U& D
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
4 V9 c8 K0 u! Z$ V+ qIf the teacher taught,: F5 t, ~* L4 e. s4 a. {: o/ o
Why didn't the preacher praught.; N- D+ o: @, a1 K+ w1 D
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
0 l$ f! B5 {: Z! C2 w5 jWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?& \! j; a6 X: F8 w8 G6 K
Why do people recite at a play i* c0 @) P1 i# v, Y- ]/ P5 F
Yet play at a recital?# p+ D! p* v- R* ^8 k, A$ J& v
Park on driveways and3 z$ l- I2 V, t2 b t: D+ r
Drive on parkways
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6 k/ q9 L+ {- m) `+ X; s9 fYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy/ n9 r0 L5 e8 K2 Q8 Q1 X) s. E
Of a language where a house can burn up as; P# t& v" M" n. l- ?- X8 D3 U
It burns down i) v7 L7 `' b) \: o$ i& v, Y
And in which you fill in a form 0 a# z4 e, m8 A& [8 X# x( w
By filling it out0 f/ h( p% i8 Q
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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- m8 `+ |2 p+ V3 O% sEnglish was invented by people, not computers
, p1 l8 E5 T6 J. P; s" {2 BAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race2 u) K2 x; n. |
(Which of course isn't a race at all) I) l. C6 G2 X9 ^6 S6 N$ s/ e
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That is why4 M3 z9 S0 _1 ~) D" U) w
When the stars are out they are visible
8 z6 p# ]8 Z4 o [# {# E. MBut when the lights are out they are invisible* `5 o8 e9 u" `8 f9 G
And why it is that when I wind up my watch. f1 I- @0 I' |) U1 A
It starts
0 s. t7 S n0 s5 cBut when I wind up this observation,
; q: p( g# _/ t! A; X; ^( sIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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