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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?) ]- S* X; O5 b0 f" W7 Q0 x
) C1 N) q9 S6 ~' M& N: c R2 }Let's face it
! Y0 V, o5 q# t+ y. DEnglish is a stupid language.. E" e+ ^( r; }; B
There is no egg in the eggplant* V& u9 H9 x9 w( o3 J
No ham in the hamburger
, O; l2 E& `3 [, F: \And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.. W6 `) ~& k8 v8 h
English muffins were not invented in England
: ~( H& d1 R( s/ c; y5 NFrench fries were not invented in France.% P& U5 ?7 T3 p: y2 y/ _
" k0 y+ o) a1 Z2 P! K3 u( q" jWe sometimes take English for granted
}4 E- U( B. BBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that# v! S2 O) _ J. q# X# y( o2 V
Quicksand takes you down slowly
% K, W( H8 l6 f3 [* H: p- NBoxing rings are square# b: |5 h9 ~' m9 G, }
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.# Z+ \4 j+ Y8 p% D3 V
If the plural of tooth is teeth2 i* j; A! m7 D5 Z
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
. e# \5 C: U) xIf the teacher taught,
1 D7 N& I! p, A) {/ f0 T8 AWhy didn't the preacher praught.8 a0 I, T9 J0 m* w, X
1 u2 o: |' \" N7 |/ c. K5 ?( GIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
G4 p) h2 g( \1 X3 d- g1 Q' ~What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
# L9 D1 A! }3 L! q8 i0 NWhy do people recite at a play
+ H) c8 p+ Q6 ~. a$ nYet play at a recital?
# ^8 V4 b! U% k3 y" n# hPark on driveways and$ w/ Q* o7 g0 P7 T- W
Drive on parkways
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3 l; x: C/ a# j1 H3 ~5 s& h' z1 GYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
0 z4 h+ J$ e5 sOf a language where a house can burn up as
4 [# L) u w6 gIt burns down4 S O( p9 H5 o+ W0 h3 J
And in which you fill in a form
% G/ B, y: r [! u* @& a b7 ~By filling it out
6 ~" @$ y& f; I3 h) ~And a bell is only heard once it goes!& _+ E- ~! I4 M2 N' i- \6 P
9 u6 ^3 p6 c: t' W1 A \" n% C7 h+ {English was invented by people, not computers
2 J/ _" P3 x- x, C: y K. JAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
* `) h0 e, p2 E$ \% p( K(Which of course isn't a race at all)" X: C& x# C1 @
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That is why2 A* D v# Z/ t( u
When the stars are out they are visible7 R) A* K6 V6 O- |6 z& v: G
But when the lights are out they are invisible
1 N6 E: i, T8 n0 L6 R. H0 gAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch7 V q* R2 O, C4 J$ s
It starts- Q r, O/ f7 h# R- @, e; S
But when I wind up this observation,6 B$ U, \" l4 n0 T7 W, f
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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