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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?8 t+ o& M& \5 h$ w
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Let's face it
$ f2 i( W: r' {$ y4 p- W$ p$ S. sEnglish is a stupid language.
$ z, g/ w3 e& Z' a* Y0 ~, {2 ~There is no egg in the eggplant/ e5 ?9 H" O' C6 u m
No ham in the hamburger3 `7 P; Y# W8 d
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
]9 W# S- l' |English muffins were not invented in England& ?$ Y5 ~9 `& u" H8 J7 p4 F
French fries were not invented in France.4 A7 d! Z* }$ w h
/ V; k& k4 i8 M. ~9 HWe sometimes take English for granted, g! t. C) ?5 Z& }9 U( X
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that$ j o/ M! R- }3 q, X( e
Quicksand takes you down slowly9 h) ~$ n. v" s' P- r& M
Boxing rings are square
5 b# I3 y. h7 kAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. & r3 D* |/ K" e
$ T) ^4 j! R( a' @% {4 F# _3 CIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
7 v. v" t8 \2 h+ _& n" w3 g' c0 JIf the plural of tooth is teeth
~; f$ `, N1 C$ H9 R7 y" k& J9 JShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth5 W% u0 T0 s9 X0 F; {
If the teacher taught,. H' S6 k0 \' ^- x6 N& i( ~+ |0 P+ S
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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5 J, t2 H6 D3 K$ ~# R! _1 lIf a vegetarian eats vegetables: B# _- ~5 T5 S! p8 z7 z2 ?1 X
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
6 S) G5 E# W6 K$ b( Y4 Y Y/ [7 }Why do people recite at a play D8 Z5 L$ ]8 Z( _, [2 I
Yet play at a recital?- {; H4 S3 K H2 R( F
Park on driveways and
6 R+ g4 d& f: }3 N9 s: M$ ADrive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy* l. @6 f9 n+ _! Z9 V
Of a language where a house can burn up as
! D' c4 I- k- y$ CIt burns down
1 H' J2 N2 p1 a! [And in which you fill in a form 1 ^ w' {1 {+ H3 A3 }$ j
By filling it out9 i* p( G! C# v# X
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
+ ~+ ^: @' m( C& ]5 \And it reflects the creativity of the human race
?* j) M! u) P. i! L M(Which of course isn't a race at all)3 `- m" T5 m6 d* _! ]/ m
0 r$ F* C& Z( L' C! ~That is why
7 @4 d) \! e" U, jWhen the stars are out they are visible
" f6 h; j+ o; j$ `. v5 d4 G; g3 k, DBut when the lights are out they are invisible
' O; \' U; M. k2 ~; N' YAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
2 {* r. L/ m8 [3 S+ u PIt starts3 \' N k% M0 r, A% r
But when I wind up this observation,
$ n, I* x0 n3 y# P# p: `! Z& x2 [It ends. |
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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