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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?2 _2 t/ r" {+ r4 t" }% K h
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Let's face it; H0 g+ o# F% [3 i) K$ [
English is a stupid language.
# w0 J$ l7 k; c. L: D3 V- r" F- {There is no egg in the eggplant9 j; c3 B, B3 r! L
No ham in the hamburger
4 }8 x( A/ \' J2 `( Y2 Z8 [) LAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
J* a8 l& L8 T7 `1 [+ c9 r* b, {English muffins were not invented in England
6 d6 J8 q2 x% p, G* }7 SFrench fries were not invented in France.9 Q/ s2 m4 F& m# m$ Z
4 k- w2 q; {+ A6 ^9 B9 _, ^0 M6 `, t; {We sometimes take English for granted7 u1 K: O- A( K4 B4 J" V6 S7 b
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
1 ^# n- o- {" A4 s% SQuicksand takes you down slowly
: ?$ K/ M$ K# g# p$ c: _Boxing rings are square c) q9 X! |5 }! Q4 t" J
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. " V) s# o2 n/ V5 u$ w5 }
/ D# G8 c4 s8 l2 e* X5 u. ZIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing." d' k7 {2 x' \0 l
If the plural of tooth is teeth
# `+ S2 t, l B8 J& wShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth. X: V1 q5 J0 N# K& w3 ^
If the teacher taught,
0 z4 e& L- F" G% |& x& T' X% YWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
5 B' s4 Q+ U1 i5 R' T u$ bWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?$ }: _1 X+ Z0 L1 [% K
Why do people recite at a play* c+ @: o+ a5 r1 V: {8 X
Yet play at a recital?
8 s6 x+ X$ m d2 V7 cPark on driveways and% ]1 c- T7 x2 i. s& f% z7 K& l* \
Drive on parkways& Y' @2 l# x d8 k
! L, k6 o n* e2 M. ~You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
2 q4 j7 w1 y9 k' \1 ^Of a language where a house can burn up as- h; H: S' F5 F, l/ ~6 L9 B/ M
It burns down
. s* ]% f( p L1 h. wAnd in which you fill in a form 2 z6 v( F4 j: \- ^: J2 O1 D* S
By filling it out
+ T" K* E1 C: {9 AAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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! ^' d; E2 ^: p r' DEnglish was invented by people, not computers
/ J2 I& N5 J b+ L) Z9 F* e7 IAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race1 V: P9 q8 w$ ~3 a
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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( K q5 u2 A( a/ }- MThat is why
' H! A7 \ }5 K& ]& FWhen the stars are out they are visible
0 l5 Q3 s) h' }# s* D5 v2 uBut when the lights are out they are invisible
& Y/ \# r6 F/ V1 n# A4 k) hAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
* `. P, s8 W8 \8 ?9 A% K) uIt starts, ~* l. F4 Y1 @8 n' H5 E
But when I wind up this observation,# k. P- ~/ y5 i) f# O$ f5 o
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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