 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
|
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
* Q% A1 L8 _, z6 W( S; G0 a, G1 F: d- r" H) G2 U) X
Let's face it
8 r6 `- l3 x, H# t; ^English is a stupid language.
3 a( W0 R: u( I8 W! t, M* hThere is no egg in the eggplant
5 L% K9 u7 y0 ]. X6 S$ J2 T) sNo ham in the hamburger! V) k) k; n' p& P' g
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
0 ?* l# T6 {" O N8 f4 ]* NEnglish muffins were not invented in England
5 F0 R1 e' [( \8 s0 E# D. \# s3 LFrench fries were not invented in France.
% c+ v; s" Z" @3 z& n/ ?
* {1 h1 h, \+ T7 q- u, {We sometimes take English for granted
2 I: O7 ^6 w8 ~! X1 P8 zBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
* D( a: g) U( x2 SQuicksand takes you down slowly$ y/ J) y2 i) E1 }9 v5 e
Boxing rings are square
+ {, y2 g( A5 j2 g( _9 n: ~7 cAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
$ }# r$ ]0 F h2 i7 f
: L2 j6 c+ X6 `0 j' AIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing. X& D& A+ D$ \! d# ?' F! I
If the plural of tooth is teeth
! ~# k# Z! f' |- }Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth& j3 x3 P) x/ J8 \
If the teacher taught,& M' N" D& Y6 y6 G2 c6 b
Why didn't the preacher praught.7 }% p" j: c( B( o3 d, @' W
7 Z! m8 s( a _% C
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
+ Z, l0 o4 \8 D1 w$ [$ tWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
) f# j4 ]8 Y8 k6 G# E |Why do people recite at a play$ I3 p0 d4 F$ w- r- r
Yet play at a recital?: _, k0 k+ e( r( ~# ]% [
Park on driveways and
1 W/ Z6 i1 B' k3 `; V$ U _Drive on parkways3 C* A. |' M4 E5 h0 P( O
, j6 o1 E# E. W; Q8 QYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy9 Y, J3 V; k( n" F9 o
Of a language where a house can burn up as
9 |5 s5 L3 t# C3 a6 i( F. k+ N" m" zIt burns down
0 i5 z1 R! |0 D' } O3 z% mAnd in which you fill in a form 0 ?$ v: U0 K9 ^3 }5 U* X3 t
By filling it out- U1 |/ ^% m& e& m/ Z
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
: x8 s9 t+ r( A1 H" v) y f" @, U5 x( U' \5 d' x: `) Y; Q
English was invented by people, not computers5 R `# j# G% f, x/ h( f" p. w
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
, `7 \. h- l3 s(Which of course isn't a race at all)5 Z7 _, g/ T# x3 D9 e0 L
! w5 k& F* s& P4 N2 \$ ^+ q% b6 iThat is why
( M, _5 N# f8 L+ W" oWhen the stars are out they are visible
$ I$ }- b N K2 t' NBut when the lights are out they are invisible
& J$ x d/ G0 P) o7 D# r5 f6 YAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch. t+ W7 j+ F! [ Y! X/ x
It starts* e' B) R4 i& z3 k* q2 h7 j7 {
But when I wind up this observation,
1 f+ G* h5 Z* L" l+ Y" VIt ends. |
|
狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
提升卡
置顶卡
沉默卡
喧嚣卡
变色卡
显身卡
发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
楼主
