English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
- B9 h+ V( O2 }2 Y
5 Q# I  B6 \: |) y- G9 GLet's face it
English is a stupid language.
" j. ?& V0 T) G) ~1 R% s8 X* I4 cThere is no egg in the eggplant
6 F3 x) C; ], \& O, CNo ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

7 P% K% h* Q2 \- eWe sometimes take English for granted
/ f3 B' f; C$ h. t' IBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
/ t6 N( q) Y; O# G4 wIf the plural of tooth is teeth
& ]: F; K8 {, L8 o3 t  Y- tShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
7 p. O, e# ~% ?, CWhy didn't the preacher praught.

If a vegetarian eats vegetables
# ~* I0 Z- q. {4 j3 tWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
- `2 r: `* f3 f( j3 j7 {Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
3 j9 J9 U. f9 X' X! N& GAnd in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
5 A6 E- Y1 A8 N. o9 q) K+ MAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
7 {4 @( I1 m: ^2 t; V+ D8 N
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)

' j4 Q" r; E- U6 w3 q( XThat is why
When the stars are out they are visible
4 J7 M4 `3 K- D! y5 C) s( KBut when the lights are out they are invisible
6 _' |) r0 r: W( ?$ nAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
" k9 q3 d: h4 c0 pIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
  Q' y7 Y4 i7 _1 T1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
  T& E4 J& p0 o2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
9 H- \& X( M! t: I3 T  j' P) d! ]4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
8 ?- ~6 {7 J8 `; C2 E1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

2 M  l  w3 M. q4 T* _
: h' u, D$ P% s谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下

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