English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
6 b3 v& H  W% i* L5 q( f
Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
# X0 |5 f3 z- U% KNo ham in the hamburger
6 I* t& s( W) r! N- {And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

# r4 K0 e, b9 \) `" e0 A7 ~We sometimes take English for granted
9 t' b. a) D2 B; UBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

$ [2 a3 j" y/ w/ ZIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
0 O' D" g5 b6 Z3 X2 L/ R- }3 n3 VIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
$ ]- p' Z4 l' e- T( f' X+ X  ]Why didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
0 E7 _* `* i  C$ o, j: ]What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
0 ?- x! {( O* ~Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
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1 [+ n6 j" K2 i1 o, O2 E/ k! qYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
) {( r$ t9 _  L1 D$ y  HOf a language where a house can burn up as
* I4 N3 [; r" ~2 q; Z$ `It burns down
. |; k% H5 q9 u+ }( p# Y8 @+ lAnd in which you fill in a form
' j4 f# t3 [/ CBy filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
: ~4 b! ^. e& ]% P5 @And it reflects the creativity of the human race
5 ]$ T1 @8 R$ D* K# s* N7 ^$ E% J(Which of course isn't a race at all)

8 {( R- C3 B4 J7 p: E# UThat is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
' H2 @% o. W6 G# L" g( b( Q" DAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
) y4 Q( r: m5 p0 u1 [; p  N+ xIt starts
But when I wind up this observation,
4 U2 q* S0 o+ R; a  m! K! i, yIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1 Q: F3 B' s8 q1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
2 n7 S% t$ B2 T# s, A$ S% E其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
5 G' r- t' j& [9 I& b8 [我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
; P  W4 t$ ?4 ~( B1 d2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

: e- y' V9 H$ F: T  Y5 S& L( n谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下

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