 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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; ?' ?+ g) a c0 B* Y; {Let's face it
! `' {8 X/ a8 H- R" YEnglish is a stupid language." n* L4 G* e( X& b
There is no egg in the eggplant
* u/ E% X. \5 {* r" Q. Q# LNo ham in the hamburger1 ?1 [: _/ d8 z# Q
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
. ~4 d) b/ ~! hEnglish muffins were not invented in England
* \9 ?, ?5 p7 J1 c, e9 qFrench fries were not invented in France.3 Y* H/ B8 Y' l% f0 I7 g6 y
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We sometimes take English for granted# u: f) g! c# _: Q5 [, c
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that$ r. g: G; x. g3 `* h4 C% w1 c
Quicksand takes you down slowly
: Z# c* B7 i+ _' y3 j. }Boxing rings are square! J3 Q7 e" j0 K* M8 [0 V2 w) W
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
( ~5 x' [& U# c w$ [4 E5 G+ ~! h5 mIf the plural of tooth is teeth
3 Q' o1 `3 O8 S+ ~) JShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth, K/ A, @- u; P; U+ g
If the teacher taught,
0 _0 X6 T+ q8 m* e W( O- VWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
' Z) H6 x M; _& b9 e* PWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?: \( T' q9 f5 N0 a' E; L
Why do people recite at a play- n1 J, N1 K9 g
Yet play at a recital?) l7 u; N( `4 Q
Park on driveways and% J3 g. k* y6 G. ?! C
Drive on parkways
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) }0 C9 T8 y/ i8 X7 ` `You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
9 w( A# M/ X, E+ j: e3 `. n0 h5 k3 qOf a language where a house can burn up as
8 V, V; k6 \7 J3 ^It burns down0 ?7 T2 R4 a8 k* r8 u8 c( m" h
And in which you fill in a form
# Z- I8 P! F+ l" g5 ^7 `By filling it out! g5 x4 j/ F; l. g
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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5 {# Y4 [# ]0 z0 {& JEnglish was invented by people, not computers
0 d5 @: e; K4 N$ f2 f2 lAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race* k" G9 C9 C* M' G
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why5 C- q0 ^" [( Z! C
When the stars are out they are visible
. B* q- y. M' t1 U$ V6 jBut when the lights are out they are invisible
: l7 w# i' l2 MAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
3 o/ p* x- ^/ y5 `4 b( d2 KIt starts9 |5 i3 ]0 {# c" b- }' J* K
But when I wind up this observation,2 Z4 \. x2 |( y4 l5 T" G. t
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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