 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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( D! x2 ~ k% Y" _+ `) H; M- n, gLet's face it( ]" c/ }: j4 e' R+ Z% v' x
English is a stupid language.
( l1 J8 x: T' E/ B; G/ b- t: p' U' ?There is no egg in the eggplant2 `+ c$ Z9 a. ?4 `
No ham in the hamburger
' [/ F$ {) W' P4 eAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.: H; M" M' S8 ~2 K j
English muffins were not invented in England
+ i( z& ]5 C8 wFrench fries were not invented in France.
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) i% l/ V" [2 P: n, G& O) ^We sometimes take English for granted, b1 m- g- c7 s% W; ^; p: n8 I1 n( Q
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that: h: [+ r% Y, c W4 B+ t2 ^( {
Quicksand takes you down slowly @$ z, m$ a/ C0 P- f9 }
Boxing rings are square: u9 k6 F" U% Y% L' {9 _9 H
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.- e) n y, [% D; H# @+ ^
If the plural of tooth is teeth, ]6 h c8 n& u% M8 T: M# }$ X8 N
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth5 t3 |; q0 S! V/ I" T
If the teacher taught,
0 A) a" o4 P p7 N( E, K/ a; iWhy didn't the preacher praught.- {9 w1 J$ D( u; C
8 \1 ]' `7 D0 r; i2 s6 t. z) yIf a vegetarian eats vegetables. U) f0 o8 f5 y2 y) J
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
' |" s6 N4 \ Q) H; T" OWhy do people recite at a play) X' P% T1 B3 e4 f% p
Yet play at a recital?
9 L2 c+ Q' m; y' ?, m3 WPark on driveways and
, w" F* L0 P, r' T2 U, c, nDrive on parkways% r& E# j6 M$ ^$ Y: K
5 l7 \+ W9 o4 w4 |You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
* I, d8 n ^; z8 O& d1 Q- V* n: oOf a language where a house can burn up as- z: m- _8 d- H& V0 M6 V" w) t
It burns down$ C" W' h! @6 y5 a6 a0 I4 c
And in which you fill in a form * S9 ?2 @, j& f2 {5 |5 _! {
By filling it out+ X( [- V% t9 R, i- b
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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English was invented by people, not computers
* G% y: Y+ J! A, [! ?And it reflects the creativity of the human race
, n, q, l* o* K$ s; E E(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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/ ^* _& F/ a7 C* n7 JThat is why
- d3 S! o- ~* Y2 T8 OWhen the stars are out they are visible
' S" R- X& V, ~But when the lights are out they are invisible
9 p& @" q J {+ I) J NAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch4 R# D) C- Z6 m9 j$ \" D
It starts& l. p- D, V- {8 q# [2 L
But when I wind up this observation,% y/ F U! P, _4 j
It ends. |
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