 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?3 Z" v3 @, w4 S: r v
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Let's face it
4 Y; O7 }1 S2 y- p! ?. LEnglish is a stupid language.
$ ^3 Q! J* y! H8 Z# F) pThere is no egg in the eggplant/ T" j! [4 E B
No ham in the hamburger: b5 J7 ?( U) @( D
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.5 @) r8 Z- [* w5 O" A* f# B
English muffins were not invented in England
$ j6 ^2 N- S: E- I, QFrench fries were not invented in France.$ U# H) w% o: `8 a- z% d2 I
" e5 L, |7 r1 V8 u) MWe sometimes take English for granted. ^( q8 w% e T' r
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
. @" k) J& ^4 c* P) q/ @Quicksand takes you down slowly0 i1 J; u: g' z
Boxing rings are square
$ \7 d' I# }: GAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
$ Z/ r9 D# S, U3 HIf the plural of tooth is teeth
; s, I( }; T9 _, f% T5 DShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth% o0 g8 l5 E$ s; s7 m' n
If the teacher taught,
3 C: b% W, l* S0 L% z/ P4 QWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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5 l7 U1 u. S% `: yIf a vegetarian eats vegetables0 l4 d5 N( G x# r/ e
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?+ V9 u- c o. X9 u& u- p! g7 K- R
Why do people recite at a play
- Z; U5 g: k, k/ p9 u: D% ~# eYet play at a recital?2 L* q" `5 E$ t3 Y7 }# ?6 n# [4 P
Park on driveways and( w3 i& F0 E. R/ K
Drive on parkways4 T) O3 u0 y7 F3 R
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
+ G9 _$ X @, G. s2 `3 _4 mOf a language where a house can burn up as+ n; O7 t# A$ a/ ?1 O, M
It burns down9 n- x/ V5 L8 ?$ H# h
And in which you fill in a form . q' l2 z' {* H$ {& X3 \2 ]" ^! c
By filling it out0 g, l0 y' ^* u
And a bell is only heard once it goes!: a* K0 V& Q y
# ~. [; `1 T+ }" n5 N0 \& p. MEnglish was invented by people, not computers
( R8 m+ q$ ^. Q- v8 X9 ?8 n4 |3 R% yAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
" p- Q3 O% T- f$ ]. I' \(Which of course isn't a race at all)' ^6 |2 w5 q/ A# ]3 d
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That is why
0 D, C1 P+ g/ d# }1 o0 r6 hWhen the stars are out they are visible
6 K; H+ o, B$ `$ wBut when the lights are out they are invisible
6 Q6 w' m! B# J4 NAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
+ A: N% ^; M6 c! tIt starts
7 z& p4 {" W9 Y" {+ t- ^But when I wind up this observation,- {* W' R$ Y; r
It ends. |
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