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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?9 f7 v, E* \6 u+ ]" X2 U. `
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Let's face it
5 c6 Z, p, z: n" K4 mEnglish is a stupid language.; ~! x, [' k$ A# t) L
There is no egg in the eggplant
# k4 M$ k2 L) D, P% K p* X, [& ?No ham in the hamburger
: H: f, Q& ^$ t$ e% T1 u$ j# YAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.- _& z8 J4 g0 H# s" ]! Y
English muffins were not invented in England( v. u1 J7 T. l
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted0 F1 {7 o; O4 u5 q3 u
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
: L* O3 r4 L9 ~& i# h4 d2 d9 xQuicksand takes you down slowly
; o7 h; T$ |8 f: j9 XBoxing rings are square" I) o2 P0 c% Q% k5 ]( I% D
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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) C- T' Q( _: S. yIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
; c& k8 j/ B2 U9 d; A% w; TIf the plural of tooth is teeth
4 W8 [9 `' X! s( o% EShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
) B* M& {5 Y9 D6 I* zIf the teacher taught,' v& S2 j4 k1 S) V4 N
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables" e3 z6 |; d: p: o" R' @. q$ m8 ]
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
- T% V9 @6 Y& G0 J. |* ZWhy do people recite at a play: z% g; W6 b) A- K( m( r& _, Z a
Yet play at a recital?' E$ w9 h! d- U! }! _( y. X: p& {
Park on driveways and
% {; U; |/ a( A8 j* PDrive on parkways1 o1 d- U& [; T* v
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
2 @; [& w) D' G! ]; \& [ dOf a language where a house can burn up as
% @/ ], Z% [# C4 w% jIt burns down
$ [0 d, k. I2 U6 aAnd in which you fill in a form
" X1 ]) s$ u5 E4 y1 A% kBy filling it out
; D* E' m/ }# x% v$ ? PAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!
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. {3 K4 s( u3 B! WEnglish was invented by people, not computers3 H! k; f" p& P' m7 @# u
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
8 c" i. l/ A W$ |& D; F0 b(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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0 |) D+ d. T0 iThat is why
6 n3 z: V; i6 y5 S2 q7 }# F. k2 kWhen the stars are out they are visible0 K6 L5 x2 J0 C2 v% e
But when the lights are out they are invisible
8 O% N9 f8 ?2 X' d( i EAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch, w" ?+ {3 N6 |* X2 G8 Y
It starts
4 K( N% ?* ? W- mBut when I wind up this observation,
6 p/ Y; I4 U2 p$ c$ g+ WIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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