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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?% o/ M) c, d% e+ s5 C
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Let's face it
* h7 ~( l* v; \" @3 lEnglish is a stupid language.
% {6 l' S* e/ H3 W* kThere is no egg in the eggplant
& @5 j9 j+ |; R. J/ O8 SNo ham in the hamburger
( x# e5 t/ d" s7 TAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
$ t& Q- W4 S0 D. T; L" dEnglish muffins were not invented in England! V+ \& E. R. o P2 V
French fries were not invented in France.2 \" Z. _6 t. i( K4 d4 _5 h/ p# V
8 _7 \6 y9 T% ?We sometimes take English for granted
/ W5 E( L4 q) m8 A% EBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
I& D- C8 u# g) [4 @0 F' eQuicksand takes you down slowly) y7 _2 Z6 x. D
Boxing rings are square& G' y. H" }! v8 \7 M/ F" e
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
4 B- }$ d9 C# t+ QIf the plural of tooth is teeth
; w$ U, X: ?5 s' i6 x5 I8 VShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
( e9 v8 n1 q, T7 \4 DIf the teacher taught,
+ Z+ Y0 y4 R- E2 m( D* i" w' TWhy didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
/ t8 j# q. l0 Z6 E: nWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
( E/ S9 K1 R7 z% \5 A9 M# iWhy do people recite at a play# F1 B, C D% @
Yet play at a recital?
& j3 D c6 f/ g* I# F9 pPark on driveways and
+ i% M) J. W- F# J* H9 A! LDrive on parkways
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! |* H+ Q4 S( A( g& _+ LYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy8 f3 U }$ O) z. ?6 V1 _
Of a language where a house can burn up as; P% \( a# m4 U: s
It burns down
# k+ I( N9 Z( {% s3 vAnd in which you fill in a form
& d' S* ^, w% j0 F) Q6 yBy filling it out
, R8 G1 K" e3 F+ MAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!$ s, A' h8 g, f" J
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English was invented by people, not computers
+ t1 i$ Z) c/ u7 y. D/ l+ M; V# uAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
* ?4 K. H- w8 m(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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That is why
/ p3 E& C) T! Q2 rWhen the stars are out they are visible. v" f# B& w1 i
But when the lights are out they are invisible# o4 d2 A5 _, i0 r, c
And why it is that when I wind up my watch" {0 h4 ]2 A2 i9 v/ e# g& g2 n" j* R4 ?
It starts
$ H% e R3 v, K. W! M. XBut when I wind up this observation,7 y9 o. [6 f6 @# V6 x3 j- z
It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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