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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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1 g0 O+ L$ x: {5 l, H/ dLet's face it
7 j U [- s* M8 W9 b/ {English is a stupid language.) g- j8 @# e' T* J! _/ `, B! r) a/ g
There is no egg in the eggplant+ A/ z# t6 T9 A& ~/ h8 U, j
No ham in the hamburger
2 b, o4 @4 M. H2 \# H2 _And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple., g, N$ b) ?$ Q8 p# c$ c3 }5 j! B2 V* f" ^
English muffins were not invented in England
" r% C$ w1 X& y3 S- qFrench fries were not invented in France.) @4 q# J& P$ P0 x" i& y5 Y
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We sometimes take English for granted( F/ t, m% R3 }1 F" B, y
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
6 M1 M& B* I+ Y3 W. bQuicksand takes you down slowly; T- }) T# u4 r7 Y* x
Boxing rings are square( b* L5 ~3 W, J
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.# V8 z6 m0 E0 `
If the plural of tooth is teeth: L( C) Q1 X( n* |6 j; K
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth g2 X" ~4 t7 z5 K( a R; N& g
If the teacher taught,' @/ {: g U. V4 @
Why didn't the preacher praught.- N. `; {5 W7 v
2 q: h# x: Y0 QIf a vegetarian eats vegetables, T( f- ]7 c8 i2 y; [* w y
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
1 v' X7 B! p' u, h7 x0 u! bWhy do people recite at a play
- O1 y8 Q& a* E- t k4 O4 bYet play at a recital?4 q& I* y4 f3 U5 }5 G' V5 D# r
Park on driveways and+ \2 t$ `5 K1 a) i9 E2 P B
Drive on parkways
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! a1 f7 e5 z8 |8 w8 Z9 t gYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy" [, b, M; E @' G5 C/ E
Of a language where a house can burn up as
. `0 L9 s7 J+ R# t" \, y8 |1 ?- AIt burns down
' S2 e- _' L' |! N/ w. DAnd in which you fill in a form - ]' v9 k6 B7 W/ D
By filling it out
/ |" l1 n3 D& I tAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!! T) w* o" j2 u; p- {; @3 |4 J$ @
( } @0 y2 p3 b8 W* Y0 l, hEnglish was invented by people, not computers% b$ v. H% [2 J* V7 A
And it reflects the creativity of the human race9 Z) \! R) m% ~* X p5 C7 B
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
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! n5 X7 P$ I2 hThat is why0 T* ?$ ]8 w) F6 d6 ?5 a. K, ^9 l# Y
When the stars are out they are visible; r! S9 H% s( [
But when the lights are out they are invisible( K4 b; o- U: V* {+ y
And why it is that when I wind up my watch( h4 y; w# e) a2 v; e0 {
It starts! Y& O8 Y- _3 b6 [9 Q) M1 K
But when I wind up this observation,
3 z; M3 S* W- }, n0 O+ Y. R$ _It ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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