 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it% J$ `' v3 g3 F( v, F1 X ~
English is a stupid language.
5 ?$ k/ R1 E" o3 a9 W2 ?There is no egg in the eggplant
: B. |- ? S6 X6 zNo ham in the hamburger: I+ [6 C9 X) e: g) Z
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.& u8 `1 e4 E+ I8 m' f% d/ Z
English muffins were not invented in England. V3 {8 X2 U, V2 P' e3 S
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted/ j* m5 x6 M! H. f& i k# W* X9 i
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that% d# f/ |9 K9 \2 [ T$ _/ E
Quicksand takes you down slowly6 v2 u" f6 r1 t& Z- g
Boxing rings are square
8 ?1 V, h$ T7 E/ P8 K/ ~And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.& m/ O) u `2 q, \; B
If the plural of tooth is teeth3 \& E" O" Y1 c0 r7 ?
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth/ Z4 z6 J2 K/ D
If the teacher taught,. x9 E: K- w6 x3 j1 u# f) x$ ^% Y
Why didn't the preacher praught.
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables
: L2 O. D6 X) l9 O# y4 T9 X$ M+ UWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?- R' H. s; Y1 _3 l
Why do people recite at a play
0 U# ?$ U- r- Z9 l8 {% x$ {& S; m/ NYet play at a recital?
7 U/ X( Y2 o: N8 f, zPark on driveways and
- s- K5 X! _2 g4 P( V* rDrive on parkways
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) G% ^8 _; S! {" QYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
2 A6 V$ x O" q& rOf a language where a house can burn up as1 I9 M3 N9 X" M. `5 B
It burns down: D# t' U5 Z- ^" C. h$ g" S$ C! M' D
And in which you fill in a form ) H/ a+ z/ M2 ^9 e' |/ _% s1 Y( A
By filling it out
% V1 U( m0 o2 T) e+ B& t# qAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!1 b- ^) Q$ c, c+ w6 f
+ B5 X8 t5 }! r6 o, |) sEnglish was invented by people, not computers& `5 t7 O' }: B) U {
And it reflects the creativity of the human race! F. G& {2 `$ s+ z% d
(Which of course isn't a race at all)% {* t# G$ }0 o: L8 ]
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That is why
& w" v3 g5 \0 zWhen the stars are out they are visible
8 @& ~8 u8 N+ fBut when the lights are out they are invisible8 p! T# j7 ?, h
And why it is that when I wind up my watch! w( t3 V4 R5 m* ^
It starts2 r2 E3 t& {. N* ?9 ]8 O
But when I wind up this observation,
7 t% N3 y: T& s5 ?" ? ZIt ends. |
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狗仔卡
发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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