 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?: L) f- U" r) s2 h5 {
' W! D# a: o$ ^& r' X* \) j2 }Let's face it! ^! G1 d; g8 \3 V& T1 ~
English is a stupid language.
* p$ R0 {/ s3 W' k- E l. L0 X7 jThere is no egg in the eggplant
C/ x8 x! X1 O' ?No ham in the hamburger
, z2 X' e, s9 N' PAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.8 q0 i- c1 r; r* h" O" a
English muffins were not invented in England
! T: j) `7 `* | s* ^; QFrench fries were not invented in France.; E- X6 w& q# c5 l! m, c- A
8 N% U4 w+ A7 g8 _9 ~6 R# ?: @2 P: gWe sometimes take English for granted+ w& x6 x0 l* `% f5 E2 K0 Y9 ?
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that. \ T% ` F, y* y# h( V t. }
Quicksand takes you down slowly4 F, w2 d1 ?' Z; i. h/ ~- j9 G8 \% P
Boxing rings are square: ?6 g: `5 w, j
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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; Y6 x o- d. R4 bIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.5 K: j, G5 V+ c6 L# O9 [
If the plural of tooth is teeth, m$ k0 Z# L* y4 D1 o! j
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth* H L4 Z, d# M8 F3 R' ^& P5 b; N
If the teacher taught,; p' I* m8 v! Q5 O6 K2 x- x
Why didn't the preacher praught.) F) O; x! l* _1 _, J; ~/ i
8 F+ ` c, V3 x$ R) u1 WIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
% s( \9 I% j6 E# ?" wWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?$ x2 p$ Y: @$ m# j" D2 \4 y
Why do people recite at a play2 d1 r/ X0 f& J" ~! w$ s
Yet play at a recital?
- I2 p2 y, g6 S2 CPark on driveways and3 h* M1 w: |- x: H7 b6 Z0 m4 I5 B
Drive on parkways
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
+ l0 n- R$ l3 l1 [Of a language where a house can burn up as
8 l& p4 V+ i3 U) }9 S* Z0 v( V2 dIt burns down
/ X6 h/ W6 a/ M9 W6 f! W. WAnd in which you fill in a form ! b. Q7 W5 G' D5 o! ^" M
By filling it out# [$ D/ D% X) D1 M. I# U
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
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L* X5 i2 a3 e8 t3 BEnglish was invented by people, not computers- g3 X8 v, B2 j) B; `9 |0 y; l, e
And it reflects the creativity of the human race: g: e& r" {3 u$ l2 z4 O1 _6 `. x
(Which of course isn't a race at all) w/ H, A$ m: f C6 q% `& ~' e
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That is why9 Y8 Z4 S# s% T/ g1 _ B) P
When the stars are out they are visible
, m, W3 e6 P* _9 C5 C8 r @But when the lights are out they are invisible3 [% P. {2 F J; S4 \
And why it is that when I wind up my watch8 u% V& O3 A# ^+ p# d T
It starts: ]! }+ O# [+ j! k+ }' T! `% x- A- C
But when I wind up this observation,
! _/ U& R5 p! M0 kIt ends. |
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