English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

5 U" Z/ q8 Y4 H' WLet's face it
English is a stupid language.
6 o1 v2 ~1 g/ r+ x4 B; m' _There is no egg in the eggplant
! q4 e2 N2 n/ oNo ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
, s* d. y6 i) J2 l" Z) A# L$ `+ iFrench fries were not invented in France.

0 F( e& A, N: g+ C; M4 H' f3 TWe sometimes take English for granted
: R. n4 N8 M/ PBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
) K- m2 T# a. U: a0 ?; VQuicksand takes you down slowly
4 u5 d0 x# J6 n! p+ w$ S% k9 ZBoxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
. B8 ~- G7 c) t) X' W; r% t) h
; a/ J# m: g: i7 h6 J7 A: S3 yIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
5 c! O! J$ d* p. F8 sIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
: o; b/ |  ~& [* ]Why didn't the preacher praught.
1 v1 b% F1 x. A2 H
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
/ C/ v7 y$ ^) o  T/ z' l  oWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
$ J! ~6 w" Y4 OWhy do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways

You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
# L9 h0 r" ?2 r- U8 MOf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
9 f# d# [. `/ y5 g- s9 eBy filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

" j" _2 y2 Q" E- `English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
. e1 j' E( [, z! u( \0 ~(Which of course isn't a race at all)
) u) z% T- T1 s  Q" L3 a
That is why
# y) K' J% u3 v6 F) H2 aWhen the stars are out they are visible
" ~% M: ]6 W9 b4 ~% Y2 Q$ g+ PBut when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
! w3 r3 i  \7 w- z7 |$ r" d- tIt starts
+ y9 q: j. `0 S7 F: k& h& SBut when I wind up this observation,
It ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
7 k& A8 X+ E( H1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
/ }% t; F+ z* O5 z+ T# e; K3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
1 {$ X% k% r7 c4 H7 T% j4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
) Z: O1 m6 G) M- D. z我看了几行,就看不下去了.
. A& H' R* r! Y2 x1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

9 ~; _! h4 F5 K谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
) o4 X% ?9 ]/ |: g实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

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说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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