English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?

Let's face it
( V/ A2 Z3 m+ E/ zEnglish is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
4 G0 l) `' p8 x5 j1 L7 C2 i) ~And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
$ [9 I/ J6 C( T- BEnglish muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.

6 a! {# F! L7 C" r2 ZWe sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
* ?8 U5 w5 I' U  s" `8 ?; @' D7 k7 ?Quicksand takes you down slowly
( ~( b) a- m8 bBoxing rings are square
( L2 T0 O# S, u  s' }And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
* ?8 J" q: K- z: o
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
6 u6 Q6 u5 k2 [" nIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
( T+ q+ @  y; Y! k5 CIf the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.

3 H& D1 O8 R5 TIf a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
% |. G3 B+ v7 s  D* DWhy do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
2 }0 f3 t4 U: G' IPark on driveways and
' i2 b  _9 p9 BDrive on parkways
& B$ C8 \2 r; k$ Y
% J- X4 e  ]1 y( }* p2 MYou have to marvel at the unique lunacy
* R0 w7 ?& m0 q* N  JOf a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
' N0 c/ ~5 I& M3 G' K" C% i0 HAnd in which you fill in a form
2 }! Q/ O! U/ Y% Y, U* C; cBy filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!

English was invented by people, not computers
; K6 r6 W2 |/ C6 g3 Y$ jAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race
+ K( J7 F+ I" p' k8 x5 g+ i(Which of course isn't a race at all)
( \% }, p2 H& y2 A( H( |- p
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
9 c: e* u  g$ v- y2 f+ V1 mAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
1 u" \' A  x0 K4 XBut when I wind up this observation,
6 ?- |2 o! t* ]6 h' h+ X3 qIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
+ J2 M" T$ K( o1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
我看了几行,就看不下去了.
5 z, s1 ^6 c. z) C1 z* `# G1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
, }' K* V* j& I# z6 o$ L6 P! R2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

4 \1 c/ D& b* f谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
( x4 @# o/ {8 F/ W1 T7 t% x实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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沃索拉呐

说得不错，有收获，顶一下
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