English language

billzhao

Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
! _: x+ ~4 F- A2 e7 ~
3 @+ U) |: t& m8 j# pLet's face it
English is a stupid language.
0 I8 ^2 w" U; k0 c9 E9 N% p  M" {There is no egg in the eggplant
$ v  A# n: |) ?6 FNo ham in the hamburger
, C  ]/ E7 y& |. C6 }And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
( Z- D: ~* B! \+ u5 k8 XFrench fries were not invented in France.

We sometimes take English for granted
* @" e5 q- b6 C% ]2 f. U8 KBut if we examine its paradoxes we find that
* l" _( Q  I3 x! U# F5 C" @5 X+ R: CQuicksand takes you down slowly
- @* W3 d% l3 S  `/ U5 FBoxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.

0 c* z+ _6 E* F4 [5 QIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
5 p! B2 S4 m0 Y8 qIf the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
  D* e2 L6 d6 P1 z# c* HIf the teacher taught,
- _2 @- J' V' T- x: h+ L5 aWhy didn't the preacher praught.
$ u1 }. ]6 f& D
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
5 d! g& _3 a( \; jWhat the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
/ @$ S/ y0 z$ m0 K' Z0 rWhy do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
% v) ~4 i5 H9 A* d' s$ Z- {8 zPark on driveways and
Drive on parkways
' ?1 z5 t9 @( D8 O8 A0 D, z' g, h" R
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
# J/ U* _/ Q7 _
) F7 a4 T9 D: m9 M5 YEnglish was invented by people, not computers
6 a9 S" {/ W  [+ G( ?/ d% ~And it reflects the creativity of the human race
( t  r4 I. y7 c5 e, z(Which of course isn't a race at all)

7 j7 k7 W* r, U8 Z3 P8 IThat is why
8 D1 M& s5 L6 `. w9 s& K4 QWhen the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
5 _7 w/ O3 _6 i/ w6 zAnd why it is that when I wind up my watch
6 K% I7 Z+ N6 g. ^; g- q+ `It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
9 k) C9 V7 n% Y( B. S4 R: y8 b- N9 T1 pIt ends.

YZSUNNY

suvescape

我看了几行,就看不下去了.
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.
) s4 f) D. }, u; L3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平.
' \9 Z2 d4 v& `0 O( u# M( b0 \. p4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.

suvescape

应该是西方语系中最好学的一门外语了.

没心没肺

billzhao

原帖由 suvescape 于 2008-11-17 21:08 发表
1 V( n8 p0 J8 h# Q% S( l$ T我看了几行,就看不下去了.
/ {: r9 a: J; z9 L% b" E" E1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维.
- z( s& u& s0 D( `0 A3 f2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子 ...

9 l5 G" _. t9 ?; U5 N7 ?1 L! B8 ?谦虚使人进步。不看完怎么知道文章的精髓呢？
8 U: p% C# O/ b/ K- Z9 c8 l实话讲，这个文章还真不是中国人写的。所以并不是只有中国人才犯语法错误

lington

能写出此文的人，一定是深得英文精髓。幽默，有趣。

小柔

我觉得这篇文章还是写的蛮好的。是楼主自己写的吗？如果是转帖应该注明出处吧。

abcd460

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说得不错，有收获，顶一下

0 u: k6 ?) E# R3 j" Y
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