 鲜花( 152)  鸡蛋( 1)
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Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
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Let's face it4 t- O4 U2 T* W: i! V- P( W2 P1 x
English is a stupid language.
( M& z- O9 N* r/ `3 F/ i% EThere is no egg in the eggplant
) L& h+ X1 I J) u& ?No ham in the hamburger4 A- U6 Q! w+ j s3 T) I* V/ M
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
3 B! n% k- J. V8 ~1 l! z& uEnglish muffins were not invented in England V5 j, P% y8 d! P
French fries were not invented in France.
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We sometimes take English for granted
4 H( `; @# p0 U7 m! \But if we examine its paradoxes we find that7 k" D5 z- }4 Q" {
Quicksand takes you down slowly
. ]' F4 c6 q& B1 J, J9 T1 qBoxing rings are square
, U0 S: U2 X" v7 _And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
( L- ~, L5 f5 H2 l2 b9 ^6 r9 X& |If the plural of tooth is teeth( V0 T" e# h& N4 u
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
4 G# l5 |4 |; S2 \If the teacher taught,6 u" C1 F4 A' F% d
Why didn't the preacher praught.+ H4 X4 N- ^) F1 I, s
; F9 Q: C/ K& J/ v5 }8 QIf a vegetarian eats vegetables$ N; U6 ^, S; ^! L, G2 v
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?/ a, g% d# y7 h! U6 L
Why do people recite at a play
5 \0 v# A; m* A( h/ D* n& n7 X0 b5 zYet play at a recital?
: B% m% K t* Y- Y, ~Park on driveways and
: I& @! H! o$ Z: [4 S8 XDrive on parkways0 f% Q" g1 o' r% ?
% x- A' f" K9 @0 H2 [- j6 {You have to marvel at the unique lunacy, s( n. \/ n- b, @
Of a language where a house can burn up as
; O2 l4 O8 s/ S& h% R$ f# X% gIt burns down0 I& N K4 {' m/ q6 i: a! R6 K
And in which you fill in a form * b# c. K) c& N
By filling it out
$ D7 b; T7 w7 [8 j. N) UAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!9 p$ ]( z6 U' l0 b `1 s9 M
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English was invented by people, not computers! h- m2 M/ x3 Y. q9 B+ J; p
And it reflects the creativity of the human race0 D. K0 u8 {2 s9 V6 ]" z
(Which of course isn't a race at all)) N' q4 C" b: M6 I* R3 g( M8 [% Q
6 p7 s' i2 ]! o2 vThat is why6 s: C" u3 q% J) u
When the stars are out they are visible4 |0 Z6 g; n% C0 @& |$ t
But when the lights are out they are invisible$ I1 _ X' o, k5 G N
And why it is that when I wind up my watch u6 S8 X8 C/ |/ ?+ f
It starts
6 c6 E' g8 `3 e5 q6 Y3 i$ x8 c& P5 }But when I wind up this observation,
. j+ U! ^, g( dIt ends. |
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