Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language? 2 `) E' _; I% N + ?: Z6 C4 C/ G, c4 CLet's face it- I8 A6 F6 ^1 l
English is a stupid language. 2 t+ n3 K" Z# n! c8 Y" MThere is no egg in the eggplant 5 b( J8 w5 f% y, B8 h( H% fNo ham in the hamburger$ k7 D" k2 r& ~1 D
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple. # C7 B" ~& d+ j: |! k) lEnglish muffins were not invented in England 5 n6 ~0 y$ x/ c* [) q9 mFrench fries were not invented in France.* P$ u; s; }: u' B
9 f0 G e5 ?0 D' C$ j( G/ z0 D
We sometimes take English for granted: `$ [* p8 Y3 Q
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that. t$ X4 Z# j; x( |
Quicksand takes you down slowly& C3 n7 h j/ U. J& W' S" w5 H
Boxing rings are square9 H3 b; }/ G1 P
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. - Z% `& V+ V* T7 b# W2 A) ? ; _1 }2 m" M8 i% U% f1 I/ x; a- w( TIf writers write, how come fingers don't fing.6 ]- V1 e# W3 L
If the plural of tooth is teeth . K! n9 Y9 J) `4 E. o' z8 [Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth! k/ o; K3 p( c" Y7 G
If the teacher taught, ( U2 g H0 H& O6 PWhy didn't the preacher praught. & [0 s# ~! e* e: s* |, C/ k. w- \0 V# s6 Y
If a vegetarian eats vegetables! S* E! v/ E* G L1 Z
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?0 ?& ?; K- N9 W/ W3 C3 m& {
Why do people recite at a play ; b+ S' G: P" v: d" AYet play at a recital?5 T) l B6 q* Q- I3 ]
Park on driveways and: [! T# i; P% Q' {
Drive on parkways & B5 i: E6 Z+ d% \0 E& F i6 G; g% [9 E5 E
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy 9 N0 D! k) e7 r" X7 ~- d: iOf a language where a house can burn up as 5 T2 S( P9 | `1 A; Z4 jIt burns down0 m& I# e4 w( z- K6 \4 `' ]
And in which you fill in a form ' L% k$ B( l1 v4 z% kBy filling it out& D3 N! t3 R) P! S* i
And a bell is only heard once it goes!2 _8 w$ ?; x* |
5 s4 S$ j* X& F; }English was invented by people, not computers * _' s* n: A: W- Y5 [; zAnd it reflects the creativity of the human race6 o3 v" B& ^) u/ h) c
(Which of course isn't a race at all)6 v1 `. p/ m" S- q. U
- I* {. B% r' Z/ g- hThat is why % k& f- v* m! y8 z4 @3 C8 TWhen the stars are out they are visible " h- Q! ?2 a0 w7 M6 Q" j EBut when the lights are out they are invisible9 O4 Z/ t% J( e" p. z' U! n* j6 F
And why it is that when I wind up my watch, v$ r2 |$ J* g+ Q$ k/ B/ G
It starts v4 U+ c' O2 H& n
But when I wind up this observation, $ z' a6 @) h% _' @5 T: RIt ends.
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发表于 2008-11-17 16:24
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发表于 2008-11-17 18:40
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