Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?* K+ V2 Y& ~# m; h! \7 h1 A
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Let's face it" N/ x4 c' a# M: p" ~( U
English is a stupid language. * N' N( v7 D: F" RThere is no egg in the eggplant8 B# Z6 z* D9 _: T7 y
No ham in the hamburger - V h6 H# b% \5 d3 R0 h8 dAnd neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.7 Q! V* a# P# E- e) c. V
English muffins were not invented in England " e! w( T8 \1 F1 [French fries were not invented in France. 0 O, k E9 y+ k* ] / {7 L7 O1 |4 {2 l9 l* [We sometimes take English for granted; t0 s% X. F( M
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that* B9 O" v) }% Z
Quicksand takes you down slowly # ^& m: t8 o3 i1 M1 gBoxing rings are square ! v4 u! ~6 [0 eAnd a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. ! }; X% e# F! l: v+ k
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If writers write, how come fingers don't fing. P* ~8 n) o9 O4 O" vIf the plural of tooth is teeth # i9 l) q8 V; i* X9 A* OShouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth : f; S) k& N7 LIf the teacher taught, + S p, {& H C( @# G- eWhy didn't the preacher praught." x8 N. V1 U5 O# }2 ?- l; ]& T
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If a vegetarian eats vegetables! m8 ], x5 A% R2 t9 _
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!? 1 i( K+ d# C) @Why do people recite at a play . }2 E: K3 p1 V& W* p7 FYet play at a recital? . X" ^* w# Z6 R) k% a" f1 |Park on driveways and1 \! L& Q" m1 x% M6 Y9 F5 _
Drive on parkways* m# b! {$ W2 p
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You have to marvel at the unique lunacy: y8 p. x8 U/ Y9 t, x# e9 {
Of a language where a house can burn up as # D3 s, P9 c c& R8 o tIt burns down ' d; f! |7 W6 C2 g7 O$ T* ?( v8 L3 lAnd in which you fill in a form R* N8 a) H/ h. q! u2 J4 u% `# I
By filling it out ! |* d- T0 f- u* fAnd a bell is only heard once it goes!' h3 P& {1 x7 N1 j( K4 y
( W4 Y4 ^4 D$ R9 p5 Z5 DEnglish was invented by people, not computers3 d/ \3 @1 K' X7 j
And it reflects the creativity of the human race . Y, u y7 _& }" J(Which of course isn't a race at all) $ h# S8 s- k5 u1 z4 p! e; a# h7 |( E6 ]
That is why! k: Q0 ^% X# m& o. `, p* d7 |
When the stars are out they are visible& u6 T$ @1 K5 c j8 F7 X! x' Q
But when the lights are out they are invisible 0 V( _3 N; t* ~* ^- [7 ]And why it is that when I wind up my watch# |5 _0 F4 ]3 T/ ^: U& {$ D
It starts6 [- q; c( z: h2 z% Y. f
But when I wind up this observation,) ~& s3 n8 S) E1 T+ g/ m
It ends.
我看了几行,就看不下去了.- e! `* J; q% d H
1) 第一行, 为什么用Have? 不用现在时? 直接用现在时表达当前的意思! 用have,现在完成时,是典型的中国教学出来的思维., D2 P: g1 G. v% X
2)还是第一行, 用... trouble in learning English. 你写出你的句子,就是LINK3水平.7 A o+ A1 ]7 h
3)第二句: Let's face it. 可笑,可笑. 当然意思可以看的懂,但是写出这话, LINK2水平. + \. \' d( Y. h8 M4) 下一句: stupid 是太口语话了.如果要讽刺他,又带一些正式文章色彩,可以用not as ... as 来表达.$ u' F; B& o. V8 \
其他的,我就不看了.好象LZ最近在学习E文. 你贴写文章出来,我帮你修改修改.虽然我也不行,但是可以帮你一些.