Never Say to a Cop:

OliveOil

NEVER SAY TO A COP:
# [/ @: }& V$ {; k
1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer. (OK in Texas)
* u* F& @1 H% O4 a$ s
2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.
5 K7 g1 f% s: u+ l
9 V  H. q* h/ Y, V  X- \5 s3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?
* k4 B+ Q/ c6 h3 g; X0 \0 W
2 m. d6 ]& r) l8 w( j9 T% N4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me. Good job!
& o! v- n1 }2 e4 e/ [6 V; ^# Y
5. Are You Andy or Barney?
3 d/ C1 H; @; n2 K( d2 T
) z# |/ g6 X, a3 w: m6. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.
- W7 o/ [4 Z- l
7. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

) X: ?) X9 E; K* s1 q- l8. I pay your salary!

9. Gee, Office r! That's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning, too!
8 l' L( `& h5 x+ |" Z2 J8 b' `
: y' U$ E* A9 ?8 ~% d% I10. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

11. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there are no other cars around. That's how far ahead of me they are.
, O' ]0 N; Z: u" X& L7 P9 V
12. When the Officer says "Gee .Your eyes look red, have you been drinking?" You probably shouldn't respond with, "Gee, Officer your eyes look glazed, have you been eating doughnuts?"