 鲜花( 1394)  鸡蛋( 16)
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HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
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Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.! z# K" r% y: ~; ~. x; F
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Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. + t4 D+ r& g* B/ N6 ]4 l- {
6 P) J# H/ b/ O7 V! i' BIf you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.8 x" {' `6 u; N# N
' n5 ^% O S6 @Look at your womanly physique in the mirror --
7 e( {, V I. o7 W) j* l7 Cmake mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc., }5 _( Y& G9 N1 Y6 K
+ z2 L- v0 D; B7 W V: eGet in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
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Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
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$ F+ [2 ^6 U+ h" h, a1 F5 t/ vWash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
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* s% Z* v5 c6 A* k3 xCondition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced..
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Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
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Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. $ q4 J; l2 j* e7 ~
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Rinse conditioner off hair.
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Shave armpits and legs.. d" t' v) O% a
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Turn off shower.
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Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
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Spray mold spots with Tilex.
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Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country. + _0 h/ E2 ?; D$ }7 R
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Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. ) G- M5 C+ Q6 [/ c2 J7 |& g* O( _9 v
Z3 P' q( |8 a \6 ?* w3 g% pReturn to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. , L4 j7 O H! x+ S2 d+ u* r
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If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
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5 O2 Q' f" u' j5 PHOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: 2 q5 _* c1 R. E& {, G; v- L6 n
, b6 h5 l9 \* ]8 Y8 W; vTake off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. * ]; c m1 N9 s1 r6 R. x# n, V
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Walk naked to the bathroom.5 b# e& R" {( U& |/ b
, s2 M d6 x% R# F$ Z/ VIf you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
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Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
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7 [; @ ^* }* k4 mAdmire the size of your wiener and scratch your butt.
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Get in the shower. Wash your face.Wash your armpits. " N7 E0 ], x( g0 b
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Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
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Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
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Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
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Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
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Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. ^* N" z3 ]7 T- ^
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Pee. 6 O. A. C# l3 i: E
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Rinse off and get out of shower.
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Partially dry off.
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- w7 C9 ?2 V" W# \Fail to notice the water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. ' j0 T. [' j2 E( ~7 v1 }$ F3 L4 k, B; q
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Admire wiener size in mirror again.
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' X. F, Y6 j1 c+ _5 e7 a* f ?+ FLeave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. 6 j% o$ P3 m% G: O0 A- E! ?
8 F* A. `' H) k7 z# OReturn to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
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1 N3 j/ c# v+ Y- ]( V, ^Throw wet towel on bed. - J' `* P% Q) s! E4 K$ y0 g
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If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. |
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